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  • "Don't You Know Who I Am?": How to Stay Sane in an Era of Narcissism, Entitlement, and Incivility

  • Written by: Ramani S. Durvasula PhD
  • Narrated by: Ramani S. Durvasula PhD
  • Length: 19 hrs and 6 mins
  • 4.9 out of 5 stars (50 ratings)

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"Don't You Know Who I Am?": How to Stay Sane in an Era of Narcissism, Entitlement, and Incivility

Written by: Ramani S. Durvasula PhD
Narrated by: Ramani S. Durvasula PhD
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Publisher's Summary

It’s time to take our lives back from a world of narcissism, entitlement, and toxic relationships.

“Don’t you know who I am?” has become the mantra of the famous and infamous, the entitled and the insecure. It’s the tagline of the modern narcissist.

Health and wellness campaigns preach avoidance of unhealthy foods, sedentary lifestyles, tobacco, drugs, and alcohol, but rarely preach avoidance of unhealthy, difficult, or toxic people. Yet the health benefits of removing toxic people from your life may have far greater benefits to both physical and psychological health. We need to learn to be better gatekeepers for our minds, bodies, and souls.

Narcissism, entitlement, and incivility have become the new world order, and we are all in trouble. They are not only normalized but also increasingly incentivized. They are manifestations of pathological insecurity - insecurities that are experienced at both the individual and societal level. The paradox is that we value these patterns. We venerate them through social media, mainstream media, and consumerism, and they are endemic in political, corporate, academic, and media leaders.

There are few lives untouched by narcissists. These relationships infect those who are in them with self-doubt, despair, confusion, anxiety, depression, and the chronic feeling of being “not enough,” all of which make it so difficult to step away and set boundaries. The illusion of hope and the fantasy of redemption can result in years of second chances, and despondency when change never comes.

It’s time for a wake-up call. It’s time to stem the tide of narcissism, entitlement, and antagonism, and take our lives back.

©2019 Ramani S. Durvasula, PhD (P)2019 Post Hill Press
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What listeners say about "Don't You Know Who I Am?": How to Stay Sane in an Era of Narcissism, Entitlement, and Incivility

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eye opening

This book is a most read. Every individual should be educated on the types of narcissists present in our society so that they can maintain their distance and protect themselves.

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Eye opening and healing book

This book helped me understand a lot of things, and I feel more mindful about myself. I listened to this book through quite a few difficult moments, and I felt the book gave me support, advice, and validation. Thank you, Dr. Ramani!

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A must read - for any one with a family, a boss, a coworker, or a community.

I listened to this while driving across the country. Things I’ve learned have come up as useful information in conversation so often already, and this book has changed how I see myself and others around me.

Dr Ramani’s take is one of compassionate realism. I am deeply grateful for the work and time and community contributions that have gone I to making this book possible.

I also really like that she read it herself. It’s nice to hear words in the person’s own voice.

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A GREAT BIG THANK YOU!!!!!

Thorough, honest, caring, illuminating, educating, preventative, soothing, healing and necessary for EVERYONE. This book is not only about NPD. It's about toxicity on personal, societal and global levels. It's for all of us. Just read it, bask in it and hope that the message will keep spreading.

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2 people found this helpful

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BRILLIANT!!! RECOMMENDED FOR ALIENATED PARENTS AND GRANDPARENTS TOO!!!

This book is an incredible resource for anybody who has an interest or a need to learn more about narcissism, a buzz word that has become all-too-familiar in our society. There are far too many books, podcasts, you tube videos, etc. on the topic , by people who are not qualified to present the information in an appropriate manner, and unfortunately, by others with PhD’s in psychology, who in my humble opinion, fuel the fire in narcissists themselves, who feel they have the right to diagnose and abuse others. I feel Dr. Ramani presents the information like a professional should, using appropriate research, tone, and delivery of the information.

I am unfortunately one of innumerable alienated parents of adult children and alienated grandparents, who believe narcissism has a role to play in this alienation. I myself went from being called mother of the year (a title I was never comfortable with), to narcissistic mother of the year (in one year). I was told I lost my title as mom and grandmother as I was not deserving of such titles. My husband lost his title as dad and grandpa, and our other children have been called “flying monkeys”. This has led me on a journey of almost 5 years, of being berated, beaten, grieving and lost. My whole family has been alienated along with me and I am accused of being the blame by my estranged son and daughter in law. Despite the loving support provided to me by our family, I have had to seek counsel and have read anything I could get my hands on about narcissism and grandparent alienation in an effort to find out if I am a narcissist, and to help me heal and learn to love myself again. While I still struggle with this, I so appreciate Dr. Ramani’s constant comparison throughout the book of what constitutes a true narcissist as opposed to each of us in our being human, of having the occasional narcissistic moment, recognizing it, owning it and learning from it. Thank you Dr. Ramani for helping to contribute to my personal journey of healing.

I also appreciated the time Dr. Ramani took in her own humility, to thank so many people that helped her in a myriad of ways, to help complete this book. I would love to see a research study, or podcast, or book by Dr. Ramani , specifically geared toward alienated parents of adult children and their grandchildren, as it is considered an epidemic in our society. I am confident this would be well received by the multitudes in need, and help them in their own healing journey.

Thank you again and I will highly recommend this book to members of alienated grandparents anonymous (AGA), a group of which I belong to in Canada as a Facilitator, but that originated in the United States.

With gratitude.

Nano

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An Eye Opener

Not all heroes wear capes. Dr. Ramani has changed my life since I found out about her through YouTube and heard about your books. I knew I needed to read them. Let's just say I devoured them. I watched every video as well and feel confident how much I now know about Narcissistic abuse. This book, "Don't You Know Who I am," is full of excellent content that is engaging and new. She gives so much psychological advise, shares so many stories and provides a source of healing for the victims listening. If you're a victim of Narcissistic abuse this book is for you. This book will open your eyes and be very aware of the types of people in your lives. There are so many terms she teaches and provides so much help in different situations. She even happened to speak about how Narcissists treat you when you're sick. I happen to have a Brain Tumor and am currently dealing with what she explains. You have to read this book! It's very worth the read. I will definitely recommend it on my Instagram and Tiktok @zainah.mb. I love you Dr. Ramani you are a gem to this world!

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expert advice

A subject that is tough to endure. A bit long winded for me, too much of the same but maybe that is the point - to remind like a mantra. The youtube series is also good.

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