Maryse

Insightful!

Reviewed: 2019-06-28

This book offers a scientific approach to trauma exposing how trauma is a part of nature. We discover the natural way the body copes with trauma and releases it, how the body and minf are closely interrelated and how we can benefit from such negative experiences in the restorative process.
I found this book very insightful.

Fabulous book!

Reviewed: 2019-06-27

This has been the perfect book at this particular time in my life.
I found it to be calming and a great reminder to the best way to encounter difficult times.
It is about learning to embrass any situation we have no control on as a new direction to our life and an opening to maybe something better suited for us. I understand it as if the obstacles become a stencil that puts our focus on what is the most important for us. We just need to be receptive to the message and humble enough to adapt or risk losing our life or a part of it to resentment.

Nice overview of security basics

Reviewed: 2019-06-21

I really enjoyed reviewing the basics of security in action in the perspective of a social engineer.
There are numerous examples of social engineering exploits with the details explained and why it worked.
The last chapters details how and what fundamentals of security should be implemented in general but also how specifics should be added depending of the needs of the enterprise.
I found that despite the fact it is a book from 2002, it stays relevant in many aspects and can certainly be used and adapted to help implement the fundamentals of good security policies.
This is not a technical book but mostly on the social engineering side, an important aspect of security.

Great read!

Reviewed: 2019-05-29

I really enjoyed reading about the start of hacking, how it evolved and the whole thought process behind it.
This book was insightful and entertaining!

Awesome book!

Reviewed: 2019-04-21

This book is so awesome, I didn't want it to finish! When it ended I was left with peace and courage to keep going and a sense of being on the right track of wanting to keep going despite my own difficulties. 

This book is about going forward despite all odds. It's not a book about the perfect plan on doing intense things it's about the attitude to have.

I believe he went so hardcore and a lot of times unprepared for intense challenges because of the sense of urgency he felt about going beyond his bad odds and this I believe to be the reason of being so hard and going beyond physical limits breaking his body and still going on.

I related so well with this attitude and search for the ultimate limits possible as I have lived that way with my own realities. 

Like him, when I finally reached my own limits, it was with hypothyroidism and I had the same thought of being satisfied of having given all I had and the feeling that if that was the end, I could die with peace because I didn't hold anything. Like him, I still was ready to keep going and do the best with was left to me not going to give up as long as life was there.

I really love how he took the different steps in his life to come up with tools to push through hardships and obstacles that he shares through the book as challenges that anyone can implement. Here are the 10 challenges:


Challenge 1-

Write what is the bad hand you were given, what is your disadvantage what has held you back, your obstacle in detail.

Own it and like it saying you can't hurt me.


Challenge 2-

Have your own accountability mirror.

Tell the truth about your reality and what needs to be done about it.

Make small steps to the biggest goal.


Challenge 3-

Write down everything you don't like to do and that you should do to progress and go do it over and over again everyday. Make your weaknesses your strength. Take the path of most resistance. Go at the micro level and progress. Callous your mind.


Challenge 4-

Choose any competitive situation you are in right now. 

Who is your opponent: (teacher, coach, boss, client, collegue)

No matter how they are treating you, there is one way to not only earn their respect, but turn the tables, it's excellence.

Know the answer to, "Why am I here?"

Find how to be at your best in the worse times.

It is a mind game to endure just enough to dominate. It is mostly a mind game against ourself.


Challenge 5-

Time to visualize overcoming or accomplishing a new task and potential challenges and ways to solve them. Research the problems and solutions.

Be prepared to answer the simple questions:

Why are you doing this?

What is driving you towards this achievment?

Where does the darkness you're using as  fuel come from?

What has calloused your mind?

You need those answers at your fingertips when you hit a wall of pain and doubt.

To push through you need to channel your darkness.

Feed off it and learn on your calloused mind.

Visualisation will never compensate for work undone. 

You cannot visualize lies. 

In the midst of pain and doubt, take time to calm your mind instead of panicking, take time to be patient, regain your thought process. Slow your heart rate down by slowing down the tempo to take back control of your mind. Slow down your thought process to gain back logic thought.


Challenge 6-

Take inventory of your cookie jar. 

Include achievements, life obstacles, things you failed but repeated until success.

Feel what it was like to overcome those struggles, opponents and win.

Then get to work.

Set ambitious goals and let thoses past victories carry you to your new personal best.

The cookie jar is your shortcut to taking control of your own thought process.

Use it that way. Use this energy to succeed again in the heat of battle.


Challenge 7-

Remove the governor from your brain.

Push past your normal stopping point gradually.

This resets your baseline.

Stick to this process and soon what you thought was impossible is something you do everyday of your life.

Go beyond your 40% capacity.

The 40% rule says that we usually think we're at the limits of our capacities when we really are only at 40% in and still have 60% to give.

There is a big caution.

Do not figure this 40% rule by destroying yourself.

Don't go from 0 to 100, go gradually.

Go 5% to 10% more at a time.


Challenge 8-

Schedule it in.

It's time to compartimentalize your day.

Week 1:

Go about your normal schedule.

Take notes. 

Get super detailed about your activities. Document them all with timestamps.

This will be your baseline and find plenty of fat to trim. 

Identify wasted time to increase productivity.

Week 2:

Build an optimal schedule. Lock everything into place in 15 to 30 minute blocks.

Some tasks will take multiple blocks or entire days. 

When you work, only work on one thing at a time.

Think about the task in front of you and pursue it relentlessly. 

When it comes for the next task in your schedule, place that first one aside and apply the same focus.

Make sure your meal breaks are adequat but not open-ended.

Schedule in exercice and rest too.

When it is time to rest, actually rest.

No checking email or bullshitting social media.

If you are going to work hard you must also rest your brain.

Make notes with timestamps in week 2. You may still find some residual dead space.

Week 3:

By week 3, you should have a working schedule that maximizes your effort without sacrificing sleep.


Challenge 9-

Ths is for the unusual ones.

If you made it somewhere, you need to look for more.

You need to become uncommon amongst uncommon.

Continue to put obstacles on your way to put friction because this is how you grow even stronger.

Before you know it you will stand alone.

There is no finish line.


Challenge 10-

Think about your most recent and your most heart-wrenching failure.

Write out all the good things, all that went well, be detailed and generous with yourself.

Then note how you handled your failure, did it affect your life and relationships? How so?

How did you think during the preparation for and during the execution stage of your failure?

You have to know how you were thinking at each step because it's all about mindset and this is where most people fall short.

Now, go back through and make a list of the things you can fix.

This is not time to be soft or generous, be brutally honest.

Write them all out, study them. Then look at your calendar and schedule another attempt as soon as possible.

If the failure happened in childhood, and you can't recreate it, still write the report because you still can use the information to achieve anything. 

As you prepare keep this keep the accountability mirror handy and make all the necessary adjustments.

When it comes time to execute, keep in mind everything about the calloused mind, the cookie jar and the 40% rule in the forefront of your mind. Control your mindset, dominate your thought process.

This life is all a mind game.

Once you realize that, own it.

If you fail again, so be it. Take the pain, repeat the steps and keep fighting. That is what it is all about.


 This book is a great reminder as I am in the midst of other big challenges and even if I'm not one to quite, I find this book to be a great guide to keep grinding with courage and strategy.

4 of 4 people found this review helpful

Quick and good

Reviewed: 2019-03-20

I read this book after finishing the book Letters to a Stoic and felt that it was coming on the same ideas.
One quote that stuck out to me and that I like is, "Man does not attract what he wants but what he is." It sums it well. Cultivate your thoughts and you will cultivate your circumstances.

Soothing listening !

Reviewed: 2019-03-16

I enjoyed this book as receiving wise words from a caring friend.
Overall I found it calming and soothing.
What I get from it as a general idea is to gain control of our actions and being. Also, it is to make the focus of our life the learning of how to live and die (stoic philosophy) as a means to gain genuine happiness. Stoic philosophy is about gaining control over our emotions and our life overall, rather than having our emotions, desires or anything else, control our being.
The idea is of not wanting more than what is necessary. It is of being "want free" so to stay free and in control, not controlled by your wants.

For example, he mentions wealth is evil because it is wanting more than is needed. He describes the rich around him over-indulging in food and exposing their wealth with lots of luxury, and then would live with the fear of losing what they have and do anything despicable to prevent this. This description would be the evil. I get that the focus should not be to get the wealth for it's sole purpose, to then be controlled by it. Furthermore, just having more never satisfies the want. It is not the wealth in itself that is evil. The idea is to focus on what is honorable rather than wealth. Wealth can come but won't control you. What is honorable is to have your spirit and actions in harmony. It is to do the very best with what is given to you, with your capacities, in all matters. Do not entertain grudges for not having more and if wealthy, do not inspire envy from others by your behavior.
Honorable behavior is to live and die with dignity, remaining calm and being consistence in your actions whatever the circumstances. What we cannot control, we should not moan about but accept it as our duty to carry out and perform it with dignity.

He also says that emotions are vices to avoid. This can be confusing but here is how I understand this.
It is to not let our emotions master us but rather have self-control.
To deny our emotions is not the solution. I know from experience that cutting oneself from emotions gives way to having your emotions control you, regardless. This indirect influence makes things even harder to solve because you don't know what is making your life miserable. You live in denial.

The answer I found, and that the author talks about when talking about friendships, is in talking to a trusted person openly, without restraint. Not to everybody and anybody, but a trusted person. It could also be a therapist. At the very least, I would add talking to yourself aloud because by hearing yourself you get aware of your nonsense. Writing can bring the same benefit. The idea is not to be told by someone else what to do but to have accountability and an opportunity to express freely. With expression we have a better chance to sort things out, find solutions and avoid storms of emotions taking control over us. The other person can merely reflect on us what they see and hear and help us gain awareness. They can point things out and help give direction but the idea is to keep control on our lives rather than being shipwrecked by our emotions.
The whole idea of the book is about having self-control, not losing it to circumstances, emotions or anything else.
This is the ultimate virtue and honorable way of living.

Great concepts, less great presentation

Reviewed: 2019-01-28

This book is very long and repetitive and didn't encourage me to continue reading but I thought I should push through.
Despite that, I really appreciate the concepts and I believe it would benefit better the readers if it was better presented and not so packed with unecessary repetition.

I still want to go through the book again by going only to the last 3 to 5 minutes of the chapters (Audible version) only just to filter out the best parts that I want to remember because I believe it is worth it.
So my 4 stars are for the good concepts I find in the book but the presentation would benefit being more concise.

I think anyone interested but not willing to go through the whole book would not miss anything by just listening to the last 5 minutes of the chapters at most plus the appendixes for the Audible version.

For the written version, I guess you could spot the summary of each chapter towards the end of them if it's written as it's read in Audible.

Awesome book!

Reviewed: 2018-12-23

I really appreciated this book. It is well structured with a brief review of the main points of each chapter at the and of each of them. I feel nothing is left out concerning building habits or breaking them. Everything is well thought and even the downside of habits and how to not fall in the trap and keep progressing. Great book I highly recommend !

Best book ever for me!

Reviewed: 2018-12-15

This book has been so liberating, an immense relief. I have taken deliberate decisions even before the end of the book that brought to peace of mind and freedom. It is truely an essential book and I recommend it to everyone!