Maryse

Quick and good

Reviewed: 2019-03-20

I read this book after finishing the book Letters to a Stoic and felt that it was coming on the same ideas.
One quote that stuck out to me and that I like is, "Man does not attract what he wants but what he is." It sums it well. Cultivate your thoughts and you will cultivate your circumstances.

Soothing listening !

Reviewed: 2019-03-16

I enjoyed this book as receiving wise words from a caring friend.
Overall I found it calming and soothing.
What I get from it as a general idea is to gain control of our actions and being. Also, it is to make the focus of our life the learning of how to live and die (stoic philosophy) as a means to gain genuine happiness. Stoic philosophy is about gaining control over our emotions and our life overall, rather than having our emotions, desires or anything else, control our being.
The idea is of not wanting more than what is necessary. It is of being "want free" so to stay free and in control, not controlled by your wants.

For example, he mentions wealth is evil because it is wanting more than is needed. He describes the rich around him over-indulging in food and exposing their wealth with lots of luxury, and then would live with the fear of losing what they have and do anything despicable to prevent this. This description would be the evil. I get that the focus should not be to get the wealth for it's sole purpose, to then be controlled by it. Furthermore, just having more never satisfies the want. It is not the wealth in itself that is evil. The idea is to focus on what is honorable rather than wealth. Wealth can come but won't control you. What is honorable is to have your spirit and actions in harmony. It is to do the very best with what is given to you, with your capacities, in all matters. Do not entertain grudges for not having more and if wealthy, do not inspire envy from others by your behavior.
Honorable behavior is to live and die with dignity, remaining calm and being consistence in your actions whatever the circumstances. What we cannot control, we should not moan about but accept it as our duty to carry out and perform it with dignity.

He also says that emotions are vices to avoid. This can be confusing but here is how I understand this.
It is to not let our emotions master us but rather have self-control.
To deny our emotions is not the solution. I know from experience that cutting oneself from emotions gives way to having your emotions control you, regardless. This indirect influence makes things even harder to solve because you don't know what is making your life miserable. You live in denial.

The answer I found, and that the author talks about when talking about friendships, is in talking to a trusted person openly, without restraint. Not to everybody and anybody, but a trusted person. It could also be a therapist. At the very least, I would add talking to yourself aloud because by hearing yourself you get aware of your nonsense. Writing can bring the same benefit. The idea is not to be told by someone else what to do but to have accountability and an opportunity to express freely. With expression we have a better chance to sort things out, find solutions and avoid storms of emotions taking control over us. The other person can merely reflect on us what they see and hear and help us gain awareness. They can point things out and help give direction but the idea is to keep control on our lives rather than being shipwrecked by our emotions.
The whole idea of the book is about having self-control, not losing it to circumstances, emotions or anything else.
This is the ultimate virtue and honorable way of living.

Great concepts, less great presentation

Reviewed: 2019-01-28

This book is very long and repetitive and didn't encourage me to continue reading but I thought I should push through.
Despite that, I really appreciate the concepts and I believe it would benefit better the readers if it was better presented and not so packed with unecessary repetition.

I still want to go through the book again by going only to the last 3 to 5 minutes of the chapters (Audible version) only just to filter out the best parts that I want to remember because I believe it is worth it.
So my 4 stars are for the good concepts I find in the book but the presentation would benefit being more concise.

I think anyone interested but not willing to go through the whole book would not miss anything by just listening to the last 5 minutes of the chapters at most plus the appendixes for the Audible version.

For the written version, I guess you could spot the summary of each chapter towards the end of them if it's written as it's read in Audible.

Awesome book!

Reviewed: 2018-12-23

I really appreciated this book. It is well structured with a brief review of the main points of each chapter at the and of each of them. I feel nothing is left out concerning building habits or breaking them. Everything is well thought and even the downside of habits and how to not fall in the trap and keep progressing. Great book I highly recommend !

Best book ever for me!

Reviewed: 2018-12-15

This book has been so liberating, an immense relief. I have taken deliberate decisions even before the end of the book that brought to peace of mind and freedom. It is truely an essential book and I recommend it to everyone!

Awesome resource!

Reviewed: 2018-11-24

I really appreciated this book as I have been back to school after a long time. The book is full of tips and great ressources. I really recommend it to any student!

1 of 1 people found this review helpful