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The One You Want to Marry (And Other Identities I've Had) cover art

The One You Want to Marry (And Other Identities I've Had)

Written by: Sophie Santos, Joey Soloway - introduction
Narrated by: Sophie Santos
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Publisher's Summary

A hilarious and heartfelt memoir about finding your true voice by Sophie Santos, the fearless comic and host of The Lesbian Agenda.

From the self-proclaimed Queen of the Stunted Late Bloomers and one of the most exciting emerging voices in comedy comes an honestly funny memoir about the awkward, cringeworthy, hilarious, and longest possible journey of coming of age and into her own.

The only child of a perpetually transferring Filipino-Spanish US Army officer and a spitfire nurse, Sophie Santos spent her early years starting over again and again - and accumulating her fair share of anxieties. Growing up in 99.6 percent white communities, where girls had to learn to flash Vaseline-capped smiles before they’d be considered real women, Sophie adapted. Determined to fit in, she transformed from a tomboy misfit into a hormone-crazed beauty pageant contestant and a southern sorority girl, among other personalities. She nailed each role she took on, not shockingly, but nothing seemed to fit her true self.

In her twenties, floundering and locked in her bedroom with lesbian YouTube clips playing on repeat, Sophie began to understand that her true self might be more tomboy misfit than Southern belle. That realization set her off on a journey that led her through an unexpected lesbian puberty and eventually toward a New York comedy career.

©2021 by Sophie Santos. (P)2021 Brilliance Publishing, Inc., all rights reserved.
  • Unabridged Audiobook
  • Categories: LGBTQ2S+

What the critics say

“[A] hilarious, identity-affirming memoir…a must read for anyone who has ever struggled to just be.”—Shondaland

“Her breezy tone feels intimate and makes the more serious and somber moments—such as her first comprehension of race (and the term ‘ethnically ambiguous’), her struggles with mental health, and rueful admissions of having mistreated former girlfriends—hit all the harder. LGBTQ millennials are sure to find a kindred spirit, warts and all, in these clever pages.”Publishers Weekly

“Sophie Santos isn’t your average comedian…she details the plot points of her own life—like constant moves due to her dad’s gig in the Army and her stint in pageantry—with hilarious aplomb.”Entertainment Weekly

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