Wasn’t what I expected- Mixed feeling

Depression & Other Magic Tricks
by Sabrina Benaim
I am torn.
Am I the only one who felt kinda meh?
I related to the poems about depression, they were seriously beautiful, it felt like reading about my own emotions sometimes.
There is something extremely vulnerable about this poetry collection, something genuine and real, which makes it hurt even more when you read it, reading about the author's depression and anxiety truly made me want to hide under my blanket and cry. It was beautiful.
But some of the poems . . . I felt like some of them were just there to fill some space.
I found that the author really seemed to make some poems really long and drawn out. It might be the fact that I've been used to short poems filled with dierent topics.
The poems that really spoke to me were:
Single
Is unshaven legs, not checking in, not being checked on. cheese and crackers for dinner, skittles button drunk at 3 AM for breakfast, sweatpants, no sweat pants, no bra, clean laundry left in a pile at the end of your bed,Chocolate in bed, movies in bed, TV in bed, books in bed, writing in bed,Texting in bed, phone calls in bed, not answering phone calls in bed, dreaming of not being in bed while in bed. Single is everything in bed, everything but company.
The loneliest sweet potato
So, I'm at the grocery store because I feel sad.I feel sad because nobody is in love with me. Nobody is in love with me, but everybody loves me. Everybody loves me because I'm good at making people feel good. I'm good at making people feel good, because I've had a lot of practice on myself.Practice on myself because I feel sad a lot.I feel sad a lot, but when I'm make people feel good, I feel good for a little bit. I feel good for a little bit and then I get lonely. I get lonely and I am uncomfortable in my lonely. In my lonely at the grocery store I practice trying to make myself feel good by pretending I'm a regular person, buying her groceries, not a very sad person trying not to cry. Crying gives me a headache. Headaches make me want to crawl into bed, and crawling into bed is what sad people do. What sad people do when they are lonely

looks a lot like me at the grocery store. In my lonely at the grocery store I feel sad, but I look just like everybody else, while picking out avocados and lemons.Items nobody refers as "comfort food". Comfort food makes me want to crawl into bed.To crawl into bed reminds me of two things: I am sad and I am alone. I am alone at the grocery store, moving slowly in the condiment aisle.Everybody knows in the condiment aisle it is perfectly acceptable to stand around for too long. Stand around for too long and I will begin to tap dance.Tap dance lonely in the grocery store' is a fantastic name for a book.I think to myself while waiting in line to reach the cashier.The cashier seems surprised when I asked her how her night is going.Her night is going 'okay', she says.She says nothing else except cash, credit or debit.She waves goodbye.Goodbye is the saddest word I know.The saddest word you know is my name.My name walks around at the grocery store and feels less sad.Less sad because at the grocery store at least nobody knows no ones in love with me.

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