Coming of age as a Pakistani Mancunian

In a dramatically changing world, one young man … just wishes Steak Bakes were halal

Just a week after the world rejoices at a shiny new millennium – and realises that fears over Y2K were well OTT – you officially cross the threshold from adolescence to adulthood. On the cusp of turning twenty-one at the very start of the twenty-first century. Goodbye kids’ table at weddings, hello relatives declaring: ‘It'll be you next!’

The scope of who and what you can become are limitless. As one chaotic chapter of your life ends, another begins. In the words of Natasha Bedingfield's yet unwritten Unwritten, the rest is still unwritten. Mind you, the younger Bedingfield wasn't (and still isn't) a working-class lad from Manchester with a cob on. And she defo didn't say ‘Inshallah’.

Now the Asian side of you is unexpectedly fashionable, but the Muslim side is suddenly The Enemy, and your Northernness is a mad-for-it stereotype. Madonna is appropriating Asian-ness, Timbaland is ransacking Bollywood for samples, and Osama is turning your life upside down from a cave far away from Crumpsall.

Assalam Alaikum, Our Kid is the often comical, always complicated story of being Muslim and Manc in the new Millennium. It's about trying your hardest to figure out who you are, what you wanna be, and where you want to go in life – all while the rest of the world is busy defining all that for you.