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Part 5 of 5 of an interview with Caroline Brown of - This Crazy over 40s Life - a Black & ethnicity perspective

Here is a portion of an article by Lauren Dubinsky - Founder of Good Women Project: What I Wish I'd Known Before Watching Porn, 2012

"Pornography is a charged subject, and it's a word that rarely crosses the lips of most women. Yes, there are now breeds of the modern woman who watch, talk and joke about it regularly, but most of us still stay farther away from speaking the word than we actually stay away from it...... but statistics show that, at least in Australia, more than one-third of pornography viewers are women. Just last week, I received an email from a girl who leads a small women's group; they'd just discovered that every single one of them were watching porn.

When I was in high school, pornography was on the long list of "bad things" that I didn't know much about -- and unfortunately also on the list of things I had participated in. Never mind why I was watching it, the how is the same for nearly all of us: We stumbled upon it because of someone else. And none of us knew what to expect, or how to handle it.

I wish someone had talked about how women watch it too, so I wouldn't have had to spend years living under the shame that comes with being "the only one" and thinking there was something wrong with me....."

What are the psychosexual issues that we work with as Sex Therapists, which young people are storing up and manifests in their twenties.

• Erectile Dysfunction: Inability to get or keep an erection
• Delayed/Retarded ejaculation: Inability or 'long' delay in being able to ejaculate
• Premature Ejaculation: Coming too quickly
• Vaginismus: Inability for penis to enter the vagina due to vaginal muscles
• Dyspareunia: Female pain during vaginal penetration
• Sexual Desire Disorder: Little or no desire for sex
• Lack of Orgasm: Inability to reach an Orgasm
• Spectatoring during sex: Coaching self during sex and so not fully present
• Genital/body dysmorphia: Belief that genitals are not 'normal'
• Spermaphobia: Fear of ejaculation and specifically sperm
• Eurotophobia: Aversion to/fear of female genitalia
• Sickle cell Priapism: Ejection failure to reduce and is longlasting
• Vulvar pain

Get some help from The Kairos Centre. See what you cannot see. Begin to change that which you begin to better understand.

Help is here for you: bit.ly/pornaddictionhelp

Gary McFarlane (BA, LLM, Dip, Certs), Accredited EMDR Practitioner.

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