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57 - The Different Faces of Identity: Navigating Sexual Orientation and Gender Expression

57 - The Different Faces of Identity: Navigating Sexual Orientation and Gender Expression

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 The different faces of identity: Navigating sexual orientation and gender expression Welcome back to Blended! Today, we’re talking about sexual orientation, gender identity and expression. Discussions around these issues have been hitting the headlines more and more in recent months. And it’s fair to say that many recent rulings and debates have felt like a step backward for a lot of different communities – they just want the freedom to be themselves. But there’s a fundamental lack of understanding. A lot of people just don’t understand what it means to have a different identity or expression. And a lack of understanding, the unfamiliar or unknown, is what often sits behind fear. So today we’re going to be opening up a conversation to encourage understanding, so we can fight that fear and create spaces that are safe and welcoming for everyone. IN THIS EPISODE: [01.02] Introductions to our Blended panelists. · Kai – Social Scientist, President of TransFocus and speaker · Ross – Vice President at GLAAD Media Institute, author and speaker · Kiara-Kumail – Employee at White Ribbon and actor [04.23] The group explore sexual orientation, gender identity and gender expression and the many factors around these topics, from pronouns and labels, to authenticity and fear. · Sex vs gender · Labels · Evolution of labels/identities · Words/identities mean different things to different people · ‘I am’ vs ‘I identify as’ · Asking open-ended questions · Creating safe spaces o What are they? o How do we create them? o Language o Infrastructure o Support/listening · We’re more than just our identities · Definitions becoming reductive · Problems with identity becoming politicized · The growth of LGBTQIA+ · Pronouns · How we introduce ourselves · The nuance of curiosity and asking questions · Respect · Fear of making a mistake · Being open to being corrected · Acknowledging, and apologizing for, mistakes · Making assumptions · Internal vs external · Control · Cultural rules · How gender expression relates to physical safety · Masculinity and femininity · Shifting gender expression to suit different environments · Belonging · Authenticity · How anti-trans sentiment also harms cisgender people “Labels will never fully be able to capture everything, though they help people identify in certain ways. Ultimately, it’s not about fully understanding everything, it’s about respect and being a good human being. And labels expand and mean different things to different people. The community exists beyond a monolith, we all have different opinions – there’s no one easy answer unfortunately.” Kiara-Kumail “Sexual orientation and gender identity are not just LGBTQ things, they’re something we all have. We all have a way in which we know and understand ourselves, and share it out with the world.” Ross “There’s no right or wrong… But the way we can be more expansive is to say: ‘Tell me about yourself.’ It’s an open-ended question, and then people can feel free to share whatever they want... Sometimes people are hesitant, because they don’t know whether it’s safe to share.” Kai “If someone raises an issue, that’s a big deal because it takes so much energy. Most people in the research we do, do not raise issues. About 75% have issues, but don’t raise them.” Kai “Introducing yourself is a good way to do it. Because, if you’re asking, be honest: Are you asking the only visibly trans person in the room, or are you asking everybody that? Sometimes inclusion can actually be exclusionary. It’s good practice not to single one person out.” Kiara-Kumail “For trans and non-binary folks, people often misread them – we look at the exterior and jump to conclusions… They’re misgendered about 70% of the time, it’s on a daily basis, and that’s a heavy burden to bear.” Kai [40.44] The panel share an overview of where the US currently is with gender and sexuality issues, why many feel that we’ve taken a step backwards, and why it’s so important to continue to talk about these issues openly and without judgement. · Similarity to the persecution of gay men during the AIDs crisis in the 1980s · Modern radicalization of boys and men · Manosphere · Danger of discriminatory echo chambers · Dehumanization · Allyship · Honest, open dialogue ·...

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