"One Green Care home that I just loved was kind of messy and untidy. You had the feeling that life was happening all around you, and it was busy enough that not everybody could tidy up entirely ... a little bit of what we did yesterday, reminding us today of what we did yesterday, which actually with dementia is a very good idea.

And the woman who had initiated it identified that the culture had three elements to it: One was 'do with, not for'. Two was 'joy and purpose every day'. And the third one was 'live till you die.'

Five years after her husband's death, Fay Martin visited Green Care Farms in the Netherlands, a non-medical residential setting for people in fifth stage of dementia.

The visit ignited a recognition and an articulation of the principles that governed how she had cared for her husband as he slid into dementia.

It also helped to explain why his dementia 'wasn't that bad', why it lacked many of the behaviours that we believe to be inherent in the disease. She now wears more confidently the role of author of her soon-to-be-launched book, Dementia Widow, a memoir about love, death and survival.

Learn more about Fay and her work: https://www.faymartin.ca/

Learn more about the Strengthening a Palliative Approach to Long-Term Care project at: https://spaltc.ca/