At this Sunday Morning Café gathering, Dr. Tom Wagner explores how everyday gratitude practices cultivate resilience—especially during the holidays. Framed by personal “foundational stories” and research insights, Tom introduces the idea of doing intentional “beauty checks,” a practice of stopping to notice and savor what’s good even in hard moments. The evening blends music, guided reflection, small-group sharing, and a contemplative “sacred breathing” exercise inspired by the Ignatian Examen and somatic psychotherapy. Together, participants form a pop-up community that remembers loved ones, celebrates life, and practices showing up for one another with authenticity, curiosity, and care.

Key Takeaways

• Gratitude leads to resilience: Decades of psychology and resilience research link simple, repeatable gratitude practices to deeper well-being.
• Do “Beauty Checks”: In stress, hunt the good stuff—intentionally look for small, specific moments of beauty and savor them. This “defiant positivity” fuels strength in storms, not by denying pain but by noticing light within it.
• You don’t have to be grateful for everything: Some experiences simply hurt. But even in the hard, there is often something to notice, receive, or savor that helps you take the next step.
• Stories shape us: Personal and family stories become lenses for meaning. Retelling them across seasons of life reveals new layers—and can become reliable sources of courage and perspective.
• Community is medicine: When we share honestly (and listen with curiosity instead of advice), we become “rainy day people” for each other. Ordinary kindness changes outcomes.

Reflection Questions

• Tell the story of a challenging time that you have been through…. What did you learn from that time? What were some practices that got you through? Was there a person, or people who were a blessing to you during that time? Looking back, what was something you learned about yourself during that challenging period?
• Tell the story of a challenge you are facing right now. Is there any wisdom you picked up in past difficult times that you can use in this situation?
• Gordon Lightfoot, that great singer/songwriter from days gone by, wrote a song entitled, “Rainy Day People.” That song describes people who come closer when times get harder. When and where have you been a rainy day friend for somebody?

Resources & Links

• Join us live for the 2/15 SMC Event on relationships – whether you’re single or in a couple, this one’s for you!: https://www.tomwagnerspeaker.com/events
• SMC events honor that what is deepest within us is most universal between us. Your gift helps create space for reflection, connection, and belonging — donate here: https://gofund.me/8cb4f9463
 100% of donations are dedicated to the cost associated with bringing SMC events to more people, more often.
• Celia – featured musician: https://www.celiaisrock.com/

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