How often do you speak kindly to yourself after making a mistake or do you tend to be your own harshest critic? In this episode of Headflex, co-hosts Rebecca and Diane explore the powerful, but often misunderstood topic of self-compassion. Discover why being kinder to ourselves isn’t just “soft” or self-indulgent it’s scientifically proven to boost resilience, emotional regulation, and wellbeing.

Rebecca and Diane bust some big myths about self-compassion and share their coaching insights on why so many of us struggle to treat ourselves with the same kindness we offer others. Whether you’re wrestling with high expectations, tough self-talk, or feeling “stuck,” this episode will help you shift your perspective, boost your confidence, and unlock new ways to grow at work and beyond.

Here are the Highlights:

00:00 Introduction: Why self-compassion matters at work and in life

00:22 Seeing self-compassion as “soft” and why that’s a myth

01:08 Neuroscience: What kindness does for your body and mind

01:48 Philosophical roots from Aristotle to Buddha and Stoic wisdom

04:18 Mindfulness, common humanity, kindness

05:15 Expectations, imperfection, and tough self-talk at work

06:22 How our environment and learned behaviuor impact self-compassion

09:10 How awareness breaks the cycle of self-criticism

10:45 Is compassion weakness? Why the opposite is true

12:22 Accountability vs. kindness and why acceptance matters

15:09 When being kinder to yourself feels uncomfortable (or indulgent)

17:45 Lessons from health setbacks, parenting, and returning to work

20:45: Driving your career from compassion vs. “shoulds”

21:06 Practices to build self-compassion

26:46 Letting go, reframing, and daily habits for kinder self-talk

27:10 Self-coaching reflection questions to start your journey

Connect with us at Headflex:

Email: hello@headflex.co.uk.

Website: www.headflex.co.uk

Instagram: www.instagram.com/head.flex/

Produced by Winter Audio

Why do so many of us feel the need to be in control, at work, at home, and in our relationships? Co-hosts Rebecca and Diane dive into the complex and often messy world of control, exploring what drives our need to orchestrate and manage every detail. From the pressures of change and uncertainty to the deep links between trust, fear, and perfectionism, this episode provides real insights about how control shows up in our lives and impacts those around us.

Tune in as Rebecca and Diane discuss how our relationship with control can hold us back and how learning to relinquish control (yes, even when it feels challenging!) can help us move forward, boost collaboration, and restore our energy.

Here are the Highlights:

00:00 Introduction: Why our relationship with control matters

01:04 Control at work, when it helps, and when it hurts

02:14 What’s behind the need for control?

04:50 What drives controlling behaviours?

06:09 Real-life examples: Control at home and in the workplace

08:43 The energy drain of chasing control

09:19 The impact on teams: Collaboration, trust, and getting “stuck”

11:22 The cycle of rescuing, fixing, and passive behaviour

13:21 How to notice where control shows up for you

14:28 Trust, fear, and how to unlock new dynamics

16:15 Relinquishing control leads to innovation, creativity, and freedom

18:27 Self-compassion, pacing, and reframing what matters

20:42 Parenting, delegation, and the lessons for leadership

22:05 How to identify, trust, and delegate more effectively

22:34 Self-coaching questions to reflect on your relationship with control

Connect with us at Headflex:

Email: hello@headflex.co.uk.

Website: www.headflex.co.uk

Instagram: www.instagram.com/head.flex/

Produced by Winter Audio

Why do annual appraisals inspire so much anxiety from those being appraised, as well as their managers? Co-hosts Diane, and Rebecca take a deep dive into the good, the bad, and the ugly of performance reviews, sharing real insights from the coaching room and exploring how shifting mindsets can make these conversations far more meaningful (and less stressful) for everyone involved.

This episode brings practical strategies for approaching appraisals,, and offers self-coaching questions so you can reflect and take charge of your appraisal experience whether you’re giving or receiving feedback.

Here are the Highlights:

00:00 Introduction: Why it’s time to talk honestly about appraisals

01:45 A brief history of appraisals and why nerves kick in

03:30 Why appraisals have a negative reputation

04:26 The emotional impact of appraisals

06:22 The challenge for managers

08:52 Feedback pitfalls: The “feedback sandwich” and surprise revelations

11:46 The aftermath and why the negatives stick more than the positives

13:12 How to make appraisals more meaningful

15:15 Focusing on outcomes and forward-thinking

16:32 How to walk into an appraisal constructively

17:25 Choose a collaborative approach: Adult-to-adult communication

19:24 Who should do the talking? Why managers need to listen more

19:32 Self-care, reflections, and three essential self-coaching questions.

Connect with us at Headflex:

Email: hello@headflex.co.uk.

Website: www.headflex.co.uk

Instagram: www.instagram.com/head.flex/

Produced by Winter Audio