Mambition Moments #30 - Why I Stopped Running to School Pickup: The Parenting Performance Trap - Tiffany Scott (Sanya)
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Mambition Moments #30 - Why I Stopped Running to School Pickup: The Parenting Performance Trap - Tiffany Scott (Sanya)
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I used to sprint to school pickup. Actually run. Because being first in the queue somehow meant I was doing it right.
Last week, I strolled. I was 15th in line.
My son didn't notice.
The running wasn't about him. It was about me - compensating for working, performing for invisible judges, trying to parent like I don't work so no one could question if I was enough.
Being 15th in line didn't break him. It freed me.
I used to think good mothering meant being first. But I've learned it means knowing which standards actually matter and which ones I invented to over-compensate.
In this episode, I'm unpacking the performance trap working mothers fall into. Why we over-perform in visible moments to compensate for the fact that we're more than just mothers - we have identities outside of it, we enjoy working, we pursue our own goals.
The constant vigilance about our performance and the exhausting need to be visibly devoted every single moment.
It's ok to let my children see that I'm more than mummy - I go to the gym, I have friends, I enjoy my time alone.
Invented standards, real relief, and the freedom in letting them see all of me. That's what I'm building.