Michelle is back in New York where she’s battling freezing apartments, cursed bodysuits, and the ongoing search for a pair of non-lethal sweatpants—only to discover that both Old Navy and TJ Maxx may be actively working against the human body. Enter comedian and internet sensation Dylan Carlino, joining live from Texas with a brand new laptop purchased solely for this appearance and a shocking backstory involving accidentally deleting an entire microphone.

Together they cover Dylan’s rise from 10K to nearly 700K followers in under a year, the dark psychology of influencer culture, and why stand-ups are being emotionally replaced by ring lights. Plus: Portland post-pandemic, bombing in Austin, the dangers of “minky fabric,” and a truly unforgettable deep dive into body-shaping garments.

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Michelle joins us live from New York in the middle of a whirlwind week, starting with launch parties replete with swag that somehow healed her childhood and Hillstone lunches where she (accidentally) undermined a co-workers salad orders, and dreams coming true of seeing her face on a Times Square billboard alongside convincing ads to visit Thailand. Meanwhile, Abby Holland joins live from Tuscon where she has ingratiated herself with the less-scandalous Mayor of two two, while also criticizing vet students and their deworming techniques. In other news: Are servers becoming more Disneyfied? And why are children insisting we #FreeLuigi? This and oh so much more including a Bike Seat For Biggies update, a Boop mention & Michelle's upcoming shows at Joe's Pub this weekend and next week! You can get tickets here: https://publictheater.org/performances-jp/2026/m/michelle-collins-wait-why-don-t-i-know-you/

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It's the most highly anticipated collab of the year... when our friend and OFFICIAL Olympics Correspondent for The Michelle Collins Show Adam Rippon comes on the show to unpack and divulge oh so much about this year's Milan Cortina Games 2026. Don't let the ominous crow visit at the top of the episode fool you, there is so much to celebrate in this episode: Michelle taking Adam to one of her favorite spots in Milan to be met with one of the worst meals she's ever eaten, Adam's total Peacock takeover, and inside skater's perspective on all things rinklated, such as surprise doping tests and how periods are finally being studied on the ice (literally? Maybe!) Michelle is tricked into a purse with hundreds of different uses, Adam is tricked into choking down "Poca Debbie" cakes, and together they paint a picture of the Olympics we can pretty much guarantee you won't hear anywhere else.

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