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Birth feels different when the room feels safe. We dig into how to choose a doula by focusing on connection, clarity, and calm rather than running a rigid checklist. Instead of quizzing someone for the “right” answers, we map the questions that actually reveal fit: their vibe during intensity, their range across home and hospital births, and how they help you stay informed without pushing an agenda. If your goal is a steadier nervous system and a smoother decision path, this conversation gives you the language to get there.

We break down what to ask and why it matters: how they describe their style, the types of births they’ve supported, their comfort with inductions and c-sections, and how they collaborate with nurses and providers when decisions move quickly. You’ll hear how to screen for flexibility and respect for your choices, plus the cues that signal a red flag—like fighting the hospital rather than helping you navigate it. We also cover communication plans, on-call timing, when they typically join you in labor, and how they include partners so your support team works as one.

Backups and advocacy round it out. You’ll learn how to ask about backup doulas and why a quick intro can ease last-minute stress. Then we define real advocacy in the hospital: making space for your voice, slowing moments for consent, and protecting your presence without speaking over others. By the end, you’ll know which few questions to ask, what a good answer sounds like, and how to trust the feeling in your body when the fit is right. If you’re planning a hospital birth, exploring unmedicated options, or anywhere in between, this guide helps you choose support that aligns with your values.

If this helped you get clear, follow the show, share it with someone planning their birth, and leave a quick review so others can find it. And if you want my notes from this video, comment “notes” below.

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Medical Disclaimer:
This podcast is intended as a safe space for women to share their birth experiences. It is not intended to provide medical advice. Each woman’s medical course of action is individual and may not appropriately transfer to another similar situation. Please speak to your medical provider before making any medical decisions. Additionally, it is important to keep in mind that evidence based practice evolves as our knowledge of science improves. To the best of my ability I will attempt to present the most current ACOG and AWHONN recommendations at the time the podcast is recorded, but that may not necessarily reflect the best practices at the time the podcast is heard. Additionally, guests sharing their stories have the right to autonomy in their medical decisions, and may share their choice to go against current practice recommendations. I intend to hold space for people to share their decisions. I will attempt to share the current recommendations so that my audience is informed, but it is up to each individual to choose what is best for them.