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What if obedience in marriage isn’t about control, but about love that aims at the common good? We dig into the heart of a Catholic marriage through the living model of Christ and the Church—where respect means honoring dignity, headship means spiritual responsibility, and submission looks like strength poured out in service. The conversation gets real about how cultural baggage and family patterns confuse these ideas, and how grace in the sacrament empowers two people to move from me-versus-you into an honest, shared pursuit of holiness.

We unpack the daily work of mercy and justice—holding space for wounds without letting them harden into excuses. You’ll hear practical ways to communicate without escalating, to pause when emotions surge, and to replace accusation with clarity and care. We also talk about intimacy as the courage to be seen and received, how fear of rejection sabotages closeness, and why small habits—journaling, gratitude, daily examen, and simple prayer—retrain the heart to love well.

If trust has been damaged, we point to the shoreline scene of Christ and Peter: no shaming, just a sober question and an invitation to start again. That same grace can rebuild a home, brick by honest brick. We close with reflection prompts you can take to prayer: what you’re thankful for, where you hope to grow, and which hard topics deserve a gentle, patient return.

If this resonates, follow the show, share it with a friend who needs hope, and leave a review so more couples can find tools for covenant love. Your voice helps others choose healing over transaction and communion over keeping score.

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Have something you'd love to hear Fr. Stephen and John talk about? Email us at myfriendthefriar@gmail.com or click here!

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We explore respect and obedience through the lens of Christian discipleship, tracing how honor, office, and conscience intersect and how obedience, purified of fear, can lead to real freedom. Stories from religious life ground the theology in daily choices, conflict, and growth.

• respect as honor rooted in the dignity of persons
• Jesus is Lord as foundation for obedience
• kenosis and the purification of the will
• vows versus promises and formation in virtue
• separating person from office in authority
• conscience, limits of obedience, and channels for appeal
• avoiding legalism and passive-aggressive compliance
• speaking hard truths with prudence and charity
• moving from ritual attachment to interior freedom
• authority as service and the common good
• prayer, counsel, and reflection to discern God’s will

Please consider supporting the Discalced Carmelites. You can make a one-time or recurring donation using the link in the show notes. If you’re not able to give, please support us with prayer. “Prayer first, finances later.”

Click here to support the Carmelite Friars!

Have something you'd love to hear Fr. Stephen and John talk about? Email us at myfriendthefriar@gmail.com or click here!

Send us a text

What if your feelings didn’t get the final say on your choices—especially when life is in flux? We open up about seasons of upheaval: a child leaving for college, grieving a parent, cancer scares, and the low hum of uncertainty that follows big change. Rather than force emotions to match the moment, we explore how intentionality helps you act from conviction, not reflex, and how a Christian identity rooted in “beloved child of God” steadies you when roles and routines shift.

We map this through the story of Israel in the desert: the cloud that rests, the fire that moves, and the training of a people who learn to trust timing as much as direction. We talk about open‑ended planning, why anxiety spikes when we over‑predict, and how clinging to job titles or achievements makes transitions feel like identity loss. Then we get practical: slow, communal prayer as a way to breathe with Scripture; letting duty carry you when desire feels thin; and building habits that keep you present to God and others without numbing out or grasping for control.

The heart of the conversation is simple and demanding: hold your plans lightly and your identity tightly. Stand a half‑step outside your emotions, name them, and choose the next right action aligned with faith, reason, and love. Whether you’re waiting in place or stepping into the unknown, there’s a way to live with clarity and courage. If this resonates, subscribe, share with a friend who’s navigating change, and leave a review to help others find the show. What transition are you walking through right now?

Click here to support the Carmelite Friars!

Have something you'd love to hear Fr. Stephen and John talk about? Email us at myfriendthefriar@gmail.com or click here!