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Rebuilding Trust After Porn: A Faithful Path for Wounded Marriages

Rebuilding Trust After Porn: A Faithful Path for Wounded Marriages

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In this second half of the conversation, Tanja and certified sex addiction recovery coach Chris Grimbilas go deeper into the practical work of recovery from pornography and sexual betrayal. Chris explains why men often “trade addictions,” how healthy coping habits are formed, and why emotional awareness is essential for long-term healing. They discuss the role of confession in community, the difference between honesty and transparency, tools for identifying emotions, and the spiritual importance of asking God to reveal what’s happening inside the heart. Chris also addresses common myths and excuses surrounding pornography, explains why gaslighting and blame-shifting harm the marriage, and offers concrete next steps for anyone ready to begin recovery. The episode closes with encouragement, hope, and a prayer for couples walking this difficult road.Episode Summary In Part 2 of Tanja’s conversation with certified sex addiction recovery coach Chris Grimbilas, the focus turns to the practical steps men must take to move from secrecy into true recovery. Chris explains why men often replace one coping behavior with another, outlines the nine-step framework used in his 90-day recovery program, and emphasizes the spiritual and emotional work required to build new habits. He also offers tools for naming emotions, debunking myths about pornography, overcoming defensiveness, and taking responsibility for rebuilding trust. In This Episode Why men often “trade” one addiction or distraction for another Why new habits must replace unhealthy ones—and how to build them The three essential levels of communication: with yourself, with God, and with others Why confession must happen in safe community (James 5:16) The role of Sex Addicts Anonymous (SAA), Sexaholics Anonymous (SA), and faith-based recovery programs How emotional recognition tools like a feelings wheel help men grow in empathy The spiritual importance of asking God to reveal what’s happening inside Common myths about pornography and the truths that dismantle them Gaslighting, excuses, and blame-shifting—and how they destroy trust Next steps for men and couples beginning the recovery journey Scriptures Mentioned James 5:16 – Confess your faults one to another Psalm 139:23–24 – “Search me, O God… know my heart” Proverbs 5 – Rejoice in the wife of your youth Song of Solomon – Joy, desire, and intimacy in marriage Job 31:1 (implied) – “I made a covenant with my eyes” Resources Chris Mentioned The Recovery Mindset – Free download Proclaim Liberty ...
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