Sex isn't always easy to talk about, but today, you're going to hear from someone who is bringing the sexy back to sex ed. Dr. Alexandra is joined by Shan Boodram, a sexuality educator and certified sexologist, known for her work on Netflix’s Too Hot To Handle, The Marriage Pact on The Roku Channel, and Ex-Rated on Peacock, as well as her MasterClass, “The Art of Seduction,” which leads folks through the fundamentals of flirting, intimacy, and how to foster deep physical and emotional connections. Shan’s approach to sex education is welcoming and approachable, and she has a reverence for this topic that is oh-so central to our humanity and aliveness. From re-defining the way we draw wisdom from the ancient Kama Sutra text, to even designing jewelry that encourages folks to reclaim their pleasure in the bedroom, Shan & this conversation will inspire you to see your and your partner’s sexuality with fresh eyes. And if you’re looking for practical advice on the art of seduction, you’ll get that in this episode, too (enter Shan’s iconic “sexy eye triangle” tip). There’s so much to glean from this episode, whether you’re looking to spice things up with your partner in the bedroom, move past sexual shame, or just see sex in a new way.

You’ll come away from this episode with:

• A refreshed perspective on the “intimate self” and a reminder of how central our sexuality is to our humanity
• Practical tips for how to use flirting and seduction to connect with others, and even more importantly, with yourself
• New ideas for how to bring novelty, improved communication, and playfulness into the bedroom

“Your Midyear Refresh” on MasterClass: masterclass.com/yourmidyearrefresh

Couple Therapy Certification Course from PESI: pesi.com/dralexandra

“The Art of Seduction on MasterClass: masterclass.com/shan

Käma, Shan's jewelry collaboration with Surmeyi

Shan’s website

LOVERS by shan, Shan’s podcast

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Dr. Alexandra sits down with author and speaker Jennifer Pastiloff for a heartfelt conversation centered on vulnerability, new beginnings, and embracing joy through trying times. Jen’s candid sharing of her personal journey reminds us that we're constantly given opportunities to evolve ourselves, heal, and step more deeply into our authenticity. Jen and Dr. Alexandra also discuss navigating the "messy middle" after a breakup or divorce, and how we can begin again in life after facing bumps in the road. Jen's new book, Proof of Life: Let Go, Let Love, and Stop Looking for Permission to Live Your Life, is out today and explores all of these topics and many more.

You'll come away from this episode with:

• Hope & permission to live a bigger and more beautiful life
• Reminders for how to cultivate emotional safety in your intimate partnerships, which will pave the way for deeper connection
• A deeper understanding of the importance of "I Got You" people—the supportive folks in your circle who reflect your best self back to you—and clues for how to find them
• Empowerment to feel joy and search for beauty even in the most difficult or heartbreaking chapters of your life

“Your Midyear Refresh” on MasterClass: masterclass.com/yourmidyearrefresh

Couple Therapy Certification Course from PESI: pesi.com/dralexandra

Proof of Life: Let Go, Let Love, and Stop Looking for Permission to Live Your Life by Jennifer Pastiloff

Order Dr. Alexandra’s book, Love Every Day

Subscribe to Dr. Alexandra’s Newsletter

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Welcome to R&R: Revisit & Reflect, a new episode format here on the podcast. We’re living in a time of information abundance (sometimes information overload) and lots of that information is about mental health and relational health! But there’s a difference between consuming content and integrating it. When we consume, the information might just pass through us, whereas when we integrate, the information weaves its way into our unique story or situation, creating insight and the potential for a shift in mindset, in emotion, in belief, and in behavior. With these R&R episodes, you’ll reflect and journal with Dr. Alexandra to integrate core lessons from the podcast, starting with today’s conversation from the archive with the inimitable relationship expert Esther Perel. They explore relational ambivalence and how to reignite the spark inside your relationship, and within yourself, inspired by a listener’s question. So, get out your favorite pen and journal and join in this summer reflection.

You’ll come away from this episode with:

• A deeper understanding of the importance of rituals in maintaining connection amidst life's challenges
• A new perspective on the impact of external circumstances on anxiety in your relationships.
• The ability to recognize and respond to your partner's bids for connection.
• A framework for self-reflection with actionable journaling prompts to enhance intimacy.

Journaling Prompts:

1. How do the macro issues of the world shape your love life today? To what degree are you able to give yourself permission for play and pleasure, even as the world feels so hard? What allows you to do that?
2. In the clip, Esther reminds us that if you don’t know how to turn yourself on, there’s nothing your partner can do to turn you on. How are you finding ways to connect to your own aliveness? What are some things you can do this week, just for you, that could reinvigorate your internal spark? This could include engaging with nature, art, food, movement, or play.
3. In this clip, Esther and Dr. Alexandra talk about how for a couple to create an experience together, one partner is the initiator and one is the responder. These roles aren’t fixed, but which role do you do you tend to find yourself in more? What do you like about being in each position, and what’s hard about each of them?

“Your Midyear Refresh” on MasterClass: masterclass.com/yourmidyearrefresh

Couple Therapy Certification Course from PESI: pesi.com/dralexandra

Order Dr. Alexandra’s book, Love Every Day

Subscribe to Dr. Alexandra’s Newsletter

Submit a Listener Question