Welcome to The Big Smoke Variety Show!

Tonight, we explore music, movement, and a little misfiring magic — three very different ways humans try to make sense of the world.

We begin with music, and a deceptively simple question: what, actually, is it? Kevin is joined by director, writer and composer Bill Barclay to discuss What Music Is, a project that draws together music, neuroscience and astrophysics. From the ancient idea of the “music of the spheres” to planetary orbits and harmonic relationships, the conversation explores why music exists in every culture, why it can feel deeply right in a chaotic world, and how listening — especially to live music — is the brain-spa we all need.

When the bells ring out across The Big Smoke, we head to our local village hall to check out what's pinned to the Parish Noticeboard. Today, we turn our attention to Parkrun. From its beginnings in Bushy Park to its sprint across the globe, we explore how a free, weekly 5K became a quiet cultural phenomenon.

And finally, as the fog rolls back in, we head back to our audio-stage where two apprentice magicians arrive from the Xander Eldrick Institute to complete their final examination. The Strange Brothers attempt to perform spectacular illusions on an audio-only podcast, with predictably strange results. What follows is a brand new comedy segment for 2026, where a bit of editing and imagination result in some real magic.

So listen closely, fire up those neural networks, and join us once again in The Big Smoke.

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Links

🎵 Learn more about Bill Barclay and ‘What Music Is’

🏃🏻‍♂️ Learn more about Park Run

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Chapters

(00:00) Intro

(01:54) Bill Barclay Interview

(46:31) Parish Notices: Park Run

(54:13) The Strange Brothers

(01:04:05) Outro

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Credits

Hosted & Executive Produced by Kevin Bennett

Produced & Edited by Alex Graham

Original music by Giles Terera

Music arranged and played by Joseph Atkins

Trappist – 1 audio clip by Shawn Feeney

Parish Notices written by Adam Wright

The Strange Brothers written and performed by Jamie Sandersfield and Matthew Nicholson

Welcome to The Big Smoke Variety Show Christmas Special, recorded live beneath the West End at The Phoenix Arts Club.

Tonight, we gather for an old-fashioned festive tradition: ghost stories at Christmas, games played in good company, and the sense of connection that comes from gathering together at the darkest time of the year.

We begin with Charles Dickens, and a lesser-known seasonal tale from The Pickwick Papers: The Story of the Goblins Who Stole a Sexton — a darkly comic story of Gabriel Grubb, a gravedigger who despises merriment and is forced to confront what it means to sneer at the joy of others. From there, the live show unfolds with crackers pulled, paper crowns donned, groan-worthy jokes judged, and the mysteriously hidden Christmas Pickle, promising good fortune to whoever spots it first. Music fills the room thanks to the Lewisham Creative Chorus, performing original festive material, while Sean Clark the Mudlark shares a true ghostly tale about a trade token from the Thames foreshore, and its link to the famous diarist Samuel Pepys.

After a suitably Dickensian Pub Quiz, the night darkens with one of the most unsettling Christmas ghost stories ever written: Elizabeth Gaskell’s The Old Nurse’s Story, read by Rachel Pickup — bleak, wintry, and deliciously spine-tingling. We then consult Dr Quack, whose hysterical and historically accurate medical treatments come back to haunt him. We hear some of our audience’s favourite Christmas memories, the pickle is finally revealed, and we leave the live space behind for one final reflection: a meditation on the restless spirit of one of the original pantomime dames, Dan Leno, who may never have quite left the theatre on Drury Lane.

So pour yourself something warm, listen closely, and join us beneath the glittering West End. Merry Christmas, and we’ll see you soon in The Big Smoke.

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Chapters

(00:00) Christmas Memories

(02:14) Intro

(03:30) The Story of the Goblins Who Stole a Sexton

(17:28) Christmas Crackers

(21:00) Lewisham Creative Chorus

(30:37) Sean Clark the Mudlark’s Latest Find

(42:15) Pub Quiz: The Three Spirits

(48:51) The Old Nurses Story

(1:04:21) Dr Quack

(1:14:48) Christmas Memories

(1:16:13) The Ghost of a Pantomime Dame

(1:22:16) ‘Merry Christmas Everyone’ sung by Lewisham Creative Chorus

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Credits

Hosted & Executive Produced by Kevin Bennett

Produced & Edited by Alex Graham

Assistant Produced by Adam Wright

Original theme music by Giles Terera, arranged and played by Joseph Atkins

The Old Nurses Story by Elizabeth Gaskell adapted by Cait Roddam Jones and performed by Rachel Pickup

Dr Quack written and performed by Jolyon Coy

Many thanks to our musical guests Thomas Guthrie and the Lewisham Creative Chorus with Outcry Ensemble, Vox Urbane's Vox Genesis programme, Lydia Kenny, Francesca Collyer-Powell, Jessica Anderson, Jess Mollie and Mike Veazey

Welcome to The Big Smoke Variety Show!

This week, we slip into the strange, funny and quietly revealing world of anthropomorphism — the very human habit of seeing minds, motives and meaning everywhere we look.

First, Kevin pulls up a chair with scientist and bestselling author Justin Gregg, whose book Humanish explores why we dress up our dogs, get too attached to inanimate objects, and sometimes find ourselves arguing with ChatGPT. From friendly alligators to fauxnads, Justin explains how attributing human qualities to animals, objects and AIs can make us smarter, kinder — and occasionally a little delusional.

On our Parish Noticeboard, we trade the clamour of the city for the steady rhythm of cut tile and grout at the Hackney Mosaic Project — a place where volunteers piece together hope, community and colour one tiny tile at a time. It’s a gentle reminder that creativity can be a holiday from your own head, and that some of the city’s most moving artwork has a deeper story behind it than you might think.

Then Audio Archives returns with a newly unearthed — and increasingly unhinged — festive radio commercial featuring vanished 80s icon Jay Gladrock. What begins as a simple cereal advert soon descends into chaos, ego, and nut-based wordplay. It may well be the last surviving recording of Gladrock before he disappeared from public life entirely. Listener theories are, as ever, welcome.

Finally, we round things off with a festive Victorian Parlour Game: The Minister’s Cat. Straight from Fezziwig’s Christmas gatherings, this classic game of quick wits and alphabetical adjectives is your guaranteed cure for a post-turkey slump!

So settle in as we wander from curious minds to tiny tiles, from lost legends to lively language — all here in The Big Smoke.

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Links

🧠 Justin Gregg – Website

📘 Humanish by Justin Gregg – Book

🎨 Hackney Mosaic Project – Official Site

📚 Tessa Hunkin’s Hackney Mosaic Project – Book

🍁 Maple Leaf or Make Believe – CBC Video

🍁 Maple Leaf or Make Believe – CBC Article

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Chapters

(00:00) Intro

(01:35) Pub Quiz: Maple Leaf or Make Believe

(02:35) Justin Gregg Interview

(49:24) Parish Notices: Hackney Mosaic Project

(57:05) Audio Archives: Unreleased Commercial

(1:10:49) Victorian Parlour Games

(1:13:00) Live Christmas Show

(1:14:20) Maple Leaf or Make Believe Answers

(1:15:24) Outro

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Credits

Hosted & Executive Produced by Kevin Bennett

Produced & Edited by Alex Graham

Assistant Produced by Adam Wright

Original music by Giles Terera

Music arranged and played by Joseph Atkins

Audio Archives written by Aidan Parker and performed by Jamie Sandersfield, Matthew Nicholson and Cait Roddam Jones