TEXT US A COMMENT!

Men, stop letting the same snake crawl back into your life wearing a new skin. If they tried to destroy your name, your integrity, or your relationships, they forfeited access. Period.

“Never re-friend or re-family a person who tried to destroy your character, your integrity, or your relationships with others. Asnake only sheds its skin to become a bigger snake. if others fall victim and fall away from you because of that...LET THEM! Sooner or later that snake will bite them too.”

This comes down to three words: forgiveness, trust, access.

• Forgiveness is letting go of vengeance. You release it to God.
• Trust is earned. It is built by fruit produced over time.
• Access is proximity. Inner circle. Influence. Information. A seat at the table.

WHAT DOES “TRIED TO DESTROY YOU” LOOKS LIKE:
Here is the simple difference. - Normal Conflict is repairable.
They own what they did. They apologize clearly. They change. They rebuild.

SABOTAGE IS STRATEGIC:
They twist your words.
They leak private info.
They plant doubt in people’s minds.
They recruit others to turn on you.
They frame you as the villain so they can be the victim.
They apologize with tears, then repeat it with new packaging.

A snake sheds its skin to become a bigger snake. That is not repentance. That is an upgrade.

SOTD - Titus 3:10 (ESV)
“As for a person who stirs up division, after warning him once and then twice, have nothing more to do with him.”

THE THREE GATES TEST
Before anyone comes back in, they must pass these three gates...

Gate 1: OWNERSHIP
Do they admit what they did without excuses, blaming, or word games?

Gate 2: FRUIT.
Do you see consistent change over time, not one emotional conversation?

Gate 3: RESTITUTION.
Did they repair what they damaged? Did they correct the lie they spread? Did they clean up the mess they made?

If they fail a gate, they do not get access. They get distanced!

Men, forgiveness sets you free but it does not mean you hand your throat back to the person who tried to cut it.

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• Remember men... Stop trying & start training!
• Top Men's Podcast for 2024... https://podcasts.feedspot.com/mens_podcasts/

TEXT US A COMMENT!

This is the episode I never wanted to do...

Men, grief doesn’t just hurt, it haunts. And if you don’t learn how to carry it like a man, you’ll start bleeding on everyone you love.

WHY IT MATTERS
Because grief you don’t process doesn’t disappear, it leaks into other things.

• It leaks into your tone, parenting, marriage, Job, discipline.

SOTD - Psalm 34:18 (ESV) “The LORD is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.”

HOW NOT TO DEAL WITH GRIEF (The wrong playbook)

Men usually run one of these plays:

1. Numb it
   • booze, weed, porn, scrolling, gaming, binge anything.
   • You’re not healing, you’re sedating.
2. Bury it
   • “I’m good.” “It is what it is.” “I don’t want to talk about it.”
   • That’s not strength. That’s a delay tactic.
3. Outwork it
   • hustle as anesthesia. stay busy so you don’t have to feel.
   • Your schedule becomes your hiding place.
4. Explode it
   • anger, blow-ups, picking fights.
   • You’re not “tough,” you’re untreated.
5. Isolate and go lone wolf
   • Isolation turns grief into a prison.
6. Spiritualize it instead of surrendering it
   • quoting verses while refusing to mourn.
   • God isn’t asking you to fake it, He’s calling you to bring it

TACTICAL APPLICATION:

1) NAME IT OUT LOUD
You can’t lead what you won’t admit.

• Say the loss plainly.
• Say what it took from you.
• Say what you miss.

This is where men stop performing and start healing.

2) BUILD A CONTAINER FOR IT (A grief discipline)
Grief needs a place to go that isn’t your wife and kids catching shrapnel.

• Daily 10: 10 minutes alone, walk, pray, journal, talk out loud to God.
• Weekly check-in: one brother/pastor/counselor “Here’s where I’m at. Here’s what I’m carrying.”
• Body regulation: lift, ruck, run, sweat, not to escape, but to discharge stress and stay grounded.

3) MAKE IT MEANINGFUL WITHOUT MAKING IT YOUR IDENTITY

• You don’t deny the pain.
• You don’t worship the pain.
• You let God shape you through it.

Ask

Support the show

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• Remember men... Stop trying & start training!
• Top Men's Podcast for 2024... https://podcasts.feedspot.com/mens_podcasts/

TEXT US A COMMENT!

In this episode, we expose certainty as a drug that sedates responsibility and delays obedience. We break down the “loophole language” men use to stall their calling, why our culture is addicted to guarantees, and what uncertainty actually does to forge courage, leadership, and faith.

You’ll walk away with a tactical certainty detox: a loophole audit, a 24-hour decision rule, and a simple next-step execution plan to stop negotiating with your future and start moving like a man.

WHY CERTAINTY IS DANGEROUS (What it costs you)
Certainty doesn’t just delay decisions. It delays destiny.

1. It delays obedience.
2. It kills momentum.
3. It rots leadership.
4. It trains cowardice.
5. It steals years.

7 Loophole Phrases (and what they really mean)

1. “I’m praying about it.”
   Translation: “I’m stalling and calling it spiritual.”
2. “I’m waiting for the right timing.”
   Translation: “I want conditions to remove the cost.”
3. “I need to think about it more.”
   Translation: “I’m hoping the pressure goes away.”
4. “I just need more information.”
   Translation: “I don’t want to be responsible if it fails.”
5. “I don’t know what to do.”
   Translation: “I do know. I just don’t want to do it.”
6. “I’m not ready.”
   Translation: “I’m afraid of exposure and discomfort.”
7. “What if it doesn’t work?”
   Translation: “I’d rather stay stuck than risk loss.”

WHY WE NEED UNCERTAINTY (Uncertainty is not the enemy)

1. Faith. You learn trust without controlling the outcome.
2. Courage. You move with fear present, not fear absent.
3. Ownership. You stop blaming “lack of clarity” and start taking responsibility.
4. Adaptation. You learn to correct mid-stride instead of freezing.
5. Maturity. You stop needing guarantees and start needing conviction.

You don’t get a future without uncertainty. You get a future by moving through it.

SOTD: Ecclesiastes 11:4 (ESV)
“He who observes the wind will not sow, and he who regards the clouds will not reap.”

MARCHING ORDERS: This week, kill one loophole sentence.
Pick the area you’ve been “waiting to be sure,” and take the next step within 24 hours.

Support the show

• TDMP SITE: https://dangerousmanpodcast.com/
• Grab some DANGEROUS GEAR in our shop https://dangerousmanpodcast.com/shop/
• Support the show for as little as $3 a month https://www.buzzsprout.com/2080275/supporters/new
• Follow us on X for more shenanigans https://twitter.com/TDMPodcast603
• Follow us on Instagram for extra shenanigans https://www.instagram.com/thedangerousmanpodcast/
• Connect with Matt Fortin & Rory Lawrence
• Email us at: thedangerousmanpodcast@gmail.com
• Remember men... Stop trying & start training!
• Top Men's Podcast for 2024... https://podcasts.feedspot.com/mens_podcasts/