In this heartfelt episode of This Unexpected Life, Carrie M. Holt sits down with her husband, Bruce, to share the often-unspoken perspective of fathers in the world of special needs parenting. Together, they revisit the day they received their son Toby’s diagnosis, the wave of grief that followed, and the heavy burden of guilt Bruce carried for years. With raw honesty, Bruce describes the struggle of wrestling with thoughts he never expected to face, the power of prayer that changed his heart in an instant, and the long journey of learning to forgive himself.

As they reflect on 18 years of parenting, Bruce and Carrie discuss the tensions and tenderness in marriage, the moments of joy that shine through the challenges, and the surprising truth that caregiving can become an act of worship. This conversation is both vulnerable and deeply encouraging—reminding us that even in the darkest valleys, God meets us with grace, hope, and renewal.

Eps. 24; September 16, 2025

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• Get my new resource: 5 Practices For Processing Grief
• Click here if you want to be a guest on the show
• Carrie’s Facebook or Instagram
• Find me on Substack
• My book: The Other Side of Special

*This podcast features honest conversations with special needs parents and faith-filled guests. While I deeply value the stories and insights shared, the views and opinions expressed may not always reflect my own. Any resources listed are shared for reference, not necessarily a personal recommendation. I invite you to listen with spiritual discernment and ask the Holy Spirit to guide you in what you hold onto and set aside.

In part two of this conversation, Carrie M Holt continues her conversation with Breena Holt as she shares the heartbreaking diagnosis of Batten Disease for her son Ezekiel—and the faith and hope that carried her family through his final days. Breena vulnerably unpacks her dreams of God’s glory, the paradox of relief and grief in a terminal diagnosis, and the spiritual battle she faced as Zeke entered heaven.

Together, Carrie and Breena also discuss the raw mom-guilt that special needs mothers carry, how siblings process loss differently, and why God’s faithfulness continues to anchor their family, even years later. This episode is both heartbreaking and profoundly hopeful, reminding us that in the valley of the shadow of death, we are never alone.

Eps. 23; September 9, 2025

If you enjoyed the show, leave a 5-star review!

• Get my new resource: 5 Practices For Processing Grief
• Click here if you want to be a guest on the show
• Carrie’s Facebook or Instagram
• Find me on Substack
• My book: The Other Side of Special

*This podcast features honest conversations with special needs parents and faith-filled guests. While I deeply value the stories and insights shared, the views and opinions expressed may not always reflect my own. Any resources listed are shared for reference, not necessarily a personal recommendation. I invite you to listen with spiritual discernment and ask the Holy Spirit to guide you in what you hold onto and set aside.

In this vulnerable conversation, Carrie sits down with guest Breena Holt to share her family’s journey of raising and ultimately losing her son, Ezekiel, who battled Batten Disease. Breena honestly shares about her anxiety, honest questions about God and suffering, and the dreams God used to prepare her heart for the road ahead.

Together, Carrie and Breena explore the difference between the suffering Scripture promises (persecution for our faith) and the heartbreaking suffering of disease, disability, and death. Breena explains how Ezekiel’s illness brought “chaos” to his brain, and how she came to see that God is not the author of that chaos—the enemy is. Yet, even in the darkest moments, she discovered God’s presence, kindness, and faithfulness, redeeming what was broken.

This episode invites weary, grieving, or questioning parents to cling to the hope of Revelation 21: that one day every tear will be wiped away, and all will be made right. Until then, we live between grace—the cross and resurrection of Jesus—and glory, the day all will be made right again.

Eps. 22; September 22, 2025

If you enjoyed the show, leave a 5-star review!

• Get my new resource: 5 Practices For Processing Grief
• Click here if you want to be a guest on the show
• Carrie’s Facebook or Instagram
• Find me on Substack
• My book: The Other Side of Special

*This podcast features honest conversations with special needs parents and faith-filled guests. While I deeply value the stories and insights shared, the views and opinions expressed may not always reflect my own. Any resources listed are shared for reference, not necessarily a personal recommendation. I invite you to listen with spiritual discernment and ask the Holy Spirit to guide you in what you hold onto and set aside.