People pleasing doesn’t usually feel like a problem at first. It feels like being helpful, generous, and kind. Being easy to be around. Being the one who keeps everything running smoothly.

But over time, it can lead to anxiety, resentment, burnout, and a loss of self.

In this episode of No Alcohol Needed, Julie Miller, Steve Knapp, Mike Coyne, and Amber Fenner unpack how people pleasing actually works, why so many people don’t recognize it in themselves, and what starts to change when you stop organizing your life around other people’s emotions.

This conversation is especially relatable for people who’ve started questioning their relationship with alcohol, but it’s not limited to that. Anyone who feels responsible for keeping everyone else comfortable will recognize themselves here.

What you’ll hear in this episode:

• How people pleasing often starts as a survival skill
• Why it creates anxiety, resentment, and emotional exhaustion
• The connection between people pleasing, perfectionism, and over-apologizing
• Why saying no can feel so threatening
• What changes when you stop living for approval
• How relationships shift when you begin choosing yourself

At No Alcohol Needed (formerly Through the Glass Recovery Podcast) we’re hanging out at the intersection of emotional wellness, personal growth, and living an alcohol-free life.

We talk about emotional intelligence, self-worth, sobriety, and how to build a life you don’t wish you could escape from.

Learn more about the podcast and the work we do: https://noalcoholneeded.net

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Free weekly gathering on Zoom Real conversations about more than just not drinking. https://noalcoholneeded.net/meeting-faqs/

Julie’s writing on sober living and emotional growth: https://createalifesofull.com

In this episode of No Alcohol Needed, Julie Miller and Steve Knapp are joined by Christen Miller and Sean Rollinson for a candid, emotionally honest conversation about overcoming victim mentality and what it really means to take responsibility for your thoughts, emotions, and reactions - without blaming yourself or denying real pain.

This is not a surface-level discussion. The group digs into why victim mentality can feel protective, how blame and shame quietly keep people stuck, and why taking responsibility often feels unfair at first - especially if you’ve actually been hurt.

This episode will challenge the way you think about control, self-worth, and emotional freedom, and it will show you how to take your power back.

• What overcoming victim mentality really looks like in daily life
• Why radical responsibility can feel confronting — and why it matters
• The difference between being harmed and staying stuck
• How blame and shame fuel emotional distress and addiction
• Why anger often hurts us more than the person we’re angry at
• How thoughts shape emotions and drive behavior
• The connection between responsibility, confidence, and self-esteem
• What emotional regulation actually looks like without numbing
• Small, practical ways to start taking responsibility this week

https://noalcoholneeded.net/meet-the-voices/

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Redesign a life without alcohol - with support.

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https://noalcoholneeded.net/meeting-faqs/

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Stories and reflections on rebuilding life after alcohol.

https://createalifesofull.com

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https://noalcoholneeded.net/category/blog/

Most of us have parts of ourselves we don’t like to look at.

The reactions we regret. The thoughts we don’t say out loud. The behaviors driven by shame, fear, or old coping patterns.

In this episode of No Alcohol Needed, Julie Miller and Steve Knapp are joined by Robbie Pike and Matt Shambo for an honest conversation about what it really means to face the “dark side” or shadow self, and why learning to integrate those parts of ourselves is essential for emotional growth.

They’re not trying to make the shadow disappear. They’re talking about understanding where these behaviors came from, recognizing how they once protected you, and learning how compassion makes real change possible.

Together, they explore:

• What people mean when they talk about shadow work
• How shame quietly drives many unhealthy reactions
• Why awareness without compassion can lead to self-punishment
• How to recognize shadow behaviors in real time
• The connection between recovery work and emotional healing
• Why integration leads to freedom, not self-rejection

If you’ve ever felt stuck repeating patterns you don’t fully understand, or ashamed of parts of yourself you wish you could change, this conversation offers perspective, reassurance, and a path forward.

—

https://noalcoholneeded.net/meet-the-voices/

–SOBRIETY SUPPORT & RESOURCES–

WORK WITH US - Personalized private coaching

Redesign a life without alcohol - with support.

https://noalcoholneeded.net/recovery-coaching/

FREE SUPPORT GROUP ON ZOOM

Real conversations. No judgment.

https://noalcoholneeded.net/meeting-faqs/

JULIE’S SOBER LIVING BLOG

Stories and reflections on rebuilding life after alcohol.

https://createalifesofull.com

FULL LIBRARY OF PODCAST EPISODES

Explore every No Alcohol Needed conversation.

https://noalcoholneeded.net/category/blog/