Adventure Fantasy Humor

Imagine you’re the Pandora of myth and legend. The Greek chick with the box. Now imagine it’s your duty (and your curse) to gather up all the evil you set free and put it where it belongs - back into the box you were tricked into opening all those millennia ago. Add to the mix the world’s first rock star, an immortal villainess with a kink for poisons, and a management shakeup in the Underworld. Now imagine your box has been stolen.

Thirteen years ago Oliver's father died in a battle against Red Line, the nasty dragon that plagued Aardland. Oliver has since grown into a very large man with little ambition, earning him a new name: The Lump. When Flynn, a glory seeking adventurer, and Meena, a mysterious foreign girl, arrive with news that Red Line has stirred once again, the Lump finds himself reluctantly embroiled in a quest to defeat the dragon.

Staring down at the culmination of his life's work, Professor Norman Rumble is horrified and unable to comprehend what has happened... How could he have known? The hilarious sequel to the Siam Storm adventure. This time, Stu and Spock team up with Pon to recover the once-again stolen holy relic, though this time it's disappeared for an even stranger and more astonishing reason.

Barry's been patient, but after 27 years of trimming hedges for people he hates, he's had enough. All he wants to do is to find his missing father and to discover his inner ninja. But life’s not done with throwing him curveballs. With talking hedges, samurai ghosts, meddling psychotherapists, and an inexplicably non-linear time pattern conspiring against him, Barry must do battle to unleash the ninja within and rescue his father from an ancient army, a dark sorcerer, and a raging inferno.

Something very strange is going on in Bowling Green, Kentucky. A masked terrorist attacks a local politician and a news reporter at a minor league baseball game. A Gay Pride parade is bombed. A veteran's home is invaded and taken over by new ownership, and every resident that is not Caucasian has suddenly...disappeared.

It's crass gun porn filled with fanboy pandering action movie references. Do you like action movies? Do you like dark, edgy, hard-boiled heroes? Do you like fully automatic weapons blasting guys' heads off? How about product endorsements that are awkwardly placed between depictions of intense violence? Yeah? Then this book is for you!

Horror, Humor, and Heroes is a collection of twelve short stories, one novella, and a preview for my next novel that should contain enough variety to entertain you readers. Sample some of my finest offerings, such as - a guardian wolf fearing the coming of man, a producer willing to do anything to bring the first pay per view live werewolf hunt to the world, and a zombie running for congress.

Zombies and Calculus is the account of Craig Williams, a math professor at a small liberal arts college in New England, who, in the middle of a calculus class, finds himself suddenly confronted by a late-arriving student whose hunger is not for knowledge. As the zombie virus spreads and civilization crumbles, Williams uses calculus to help his small band of survivors defeat the hordes of the undead.

Looking for a story that sparks imagination and encourages thinking? Lunar Cars & Magic Words is filled with clever twists and mishaps, as Albert, a lovable inventor, tests his lunar car on Earth. When the Wise Old Owl steps in to help, children encounter themes of friendship, problem-solving, and a playful introduction to science concepts and set theory, all wrapped in humor and heart.

In a world where vampires and humans coexist on the brink of chaos, a fragile peace teeters against the hunger of the undead. When darkness threatens to swallow humanity, two unlikely heroes emerge to fight back. Quentin—a Southern eccentric armed with a crossbow, psychic abilities, and a sharp tongue—joins forces with Scarlett, a fearless warrior and brilliant inventor whose mastery of combat is matched only by her quick wit. Their bond, forged amid vampire cosplay events and deadly encounters, becomes humanity’s last line of defense against an ancient evil.

A half-woman, half-cockroach fused in a bizarre gardening accident? That would be Mrs Jittery Twitch, dwelling in the shadows of our misdeeds. If in danger, you can call upon her help...all she asks is your soul as payment. But she’s just a legend, so no need to worry. Barry Harris is a 28-year-old man, still living with his dear old mum in a little flat above a hairdresser. His obsession with Star Trek and the martial arts won’t help him when he’s forced out on a date. And nobody knows about the weird string of events that’s about to put everyone’s lives in danger.

Krample is the self-proclaimed evil CEO of Krample Co, a well-renowned toy company in the Jolian system. Each year, Krample sets out on a quest to thwart Galactic Claus and become the official toy provider for Galaxmas. With an increasingly disgruntled board of directors, Krample must take drastic measures to secure the future of his company and defeat Galactic Claus once and for all. Join Krample, his trusted advisor and cookie-baking expert, a hot Kolithian secretary, and a pepperoni/AI framework expert as they set out on a not-so-epic Galaxmas quest.

This audiobook is intended for children of all ages. It is set in 1959, but in a parallel universe, starring Albert, an eternally youthful 77-year-old, and his 7-year-old best friend, Wilber. Join them on their many surreal adventures as Albert seeks to cling onto his youth and find the answer of a lifetime. Three wild days in Albert's world full of imaginative scenery and quirky characters, combined with plenty of good old-fashioned 1950's boyhood charm, will leave you wondering what could possibly happen next.

The world is divided between Asia and the United Continents - two great super powers locked in eternal warfare. But the balance of power is about to shift in Asia’s favor. They have developed a top-secret weapon - the cohesion projector-that could lead to annihilation on an unprecedented scale.... But as far as Lorrilard is concerned, the number one problem with the projector is that it stands in the way of his profits. Can he find a way to subvert the powerful weapon and resume his enterprising exploits?

The time? Tomorrow. Can the president of the United Red States of America and the president of the United Blue States of America come together to stop a giant asteroid before it destroys Earth in one month's time? Who is the mysterious Doctor Apophis? What is the "S.U.R.", and why is the president of the USA determined to defend it at all costs? What the hell is the Canadian army doing in North Dakota, and why does HRH Queen Kate of England want to wage war with the USA? And what is...The Myoshi Effect?

Quiti and the rest of the Hair Suits have just set up the Hair Suite, the embassy of the alien Hair Balls, when they learn they have competition. Alien cyborgs called Chip Monks want to win Earth for themselves. The two species must duel for control. These rivals discover a third alien species that threatens to destroy Earth, and have to join up quickly in order to protect the planet they are both seeking to win. Along the way, they get swept up in a world of intergalactic politics, wormholes, and role-playing.

This paranormal adventure follows a young adventure-seeker and a curmudgeonly ghost bound together in a combative partnership that escalates to the comedic breaking point. Only by reconciling their differences are they able to defeat destructive forces working against them, and uncover the profound connections that weave their fates together.

Every cheap little barbarian movie deserves a sequel. But abiding by the laws of straight-to-video sword and sorcery, the sequel doesn’t always continue the story. They’re crazier, funny, and often far removed from the mythology laid down by the film which preceded them. So, in keeping with this formula comes Sword Dude 2. The continuing adventures of the hero also known as the Dude of Swords. He’s back, by popular demand, fighting, killing, playing it cool, and saving the girl in this phantasmagoric romp into realms fantastic.

The Wonderful World of Linus Bailey existed, until recently, entirely within Linus' head. That was okay until the morning of his tenth birthday, when it all came true. Welsh coal miners singing in the garden, a camel, a headmaster who turned evil and a school that became a castle, these all became the backdrop to the much bigger question: Would Nigel Bailey, his Yorkshire Ninja dad arrive in time for his birthday, or would Linus be trapped down a mine for ever? Immerse yourself in the mind of a ten-year-old British schoolboy as he learns to cope with a brand new world.

When it comes to big dreams and schemes, young Chuck Lambert would give Walter Mitty a run for his money. In fact, Chuck’s biggest dream of all is really out of this world. Because he’s got his eyes on a prize in the sky. Chuck wants to buy a planet of his own.... Madman Murphy, the King of Planetary Realtors, is more than happy to oblige. He’s got a whole galaxy of planets for sale. All Chuck needs is money . . . and a lot of it. Eleven years later, saving every penny he can scrape up, Chuck’s dream comes true. He takes possession and takes off for Planet 19453X...