Comedy Survival

When my best friend and the only person who knows who - and what - I really am gets selected for the Mating Games, I know the only way to save her is to try and win her for myself. All I need to do is navigate three trials while not letting anyone know I'm a woman, or, and this might be even more important, that I have magic. Easy, right? Easier than slaving away for all hours of the day swinging an ax in the mines. Or so I thought. I certainly didn't count on the one man I've longed for, the one man who stirs feelings of femininity and desire within me, to enter the games as well.

Herself a biologist, Julie E. Czerneda has earned a reputation in science fiction circles for her ability to create beautifully crafted, imaginative, yet believably realized alien races. In Survival, the first novel in her new series, Species Imperative, she draws upon this talent to build races, characters, and a universe which will draw listeners into a magnificent tale of interstellar intrigue, as an Earth scientist is caught up in a terrifying interspecies conflict.

After an epic battle, the weapon is lost, but Atlas won’t succumb so easily. He’s vanished with the key to humanity’s survival, and David Bryce is left to fight on his own. Atlas finds himself in the middle of a hornet’s nest, amid an alien people that he can hardly comprehend. But their motivations are clear, and that’s enough to keep him focused on retrieving the prize.

Like most college students, all Callie Norton has worried about for weeks was passing this semester’s finals. After a night out celebrating, she and her friends wake up, sick with way more than the hangover of the century. All too soon, Callie realizes that this is not just a common cold she’s suffering from—and when she wakes up from a coma in a quarantine tent as the sole survivor, lack of food and water aren’t her only problems.

The Zombie Survival Guide is your key to survival against the hordes of undead who may be stalking you right now. Exhaustively comprehensive, this book covers everything you need to know, including how to understand zombie physiology and behavior, the most effective defense tactics and weaponry, ways to outfit your home for a long siege, and how to survive and adapt in any territory or terrain.

When a human team is sent to scout a few hundred light-years in front of the death wave, it encounters a civilization far in advance of our own, a civilization of machine intelligences.These sentient, intelligent machines have existed for eons and have survived earlier "death waves" - gamma-ray bursts from the core of the galaxy. They are totally self-sufficient, completely certain that the death wave cannot harm them, and utterly uninterested in helping to save other civilizations.

Separated by 10 years, 3,000 miles, and the unrelenting stresses of adulthood, best friends Janet and Serena plan a 40th birthday girls’ trip to reconnect. But after a massive crash, they’re the only survivors to wash ashore on an uncharted Caribbean Island. Armed with only the clothes on their backs and zero survival skills, they fight to overcome hunger, thirst, deadly wildlife—and most terrifyingly—decades of accrued resentment. Can they find their way home, or will they kill each other first?

From an absolutely unmissable voice in cozy fantasy, this tale shares the story of fae, folklore, and found family, told by a charismatic lake-dwelling monster with a voice unlike any other. Beneath the still surface of a lake lurks a monster with needle sharp teeth. Hungry and ready to pounce...

Bruce and Mike finally made it home. But the battle for the future has just begun. The Louisiana farm that Bruce and his allies had built to survive the end of the world was everything they could have hoped for — but no one had planned for the endless horde of fast, smart, and ravenous blue zombies who could think, heal, and even reproduce. Now, as they gather an armory of military weaponry from abandoned outposts all across the countryside, Bruce and his growing clan of survivors realize the truth — their compound can be the beginning of a new and rebuilt world.

A new standalone sci-fi novel from Edward Ashton, author of Mickey7 (the inspiration for the major motion picture Mickey 17). “Barrie Kreinik, one of the best narrators around, succeeds in making distinct characters not just of Dalton and Neera, Breaker and some of the aliens, but even of the...

My name is Gary Rendell. I'm an astronaut. When they asked me as a kid what I wanted to be when I grew up, I said, "astronaut, please!" I dreamed astronaut, I worked astronaut, I studied astronaut. I got lucky; when a probe exploring the Oort Cloud found a strange alien rock and an international team of scientists was put together to go and look at it, I made the draw. I got even luckier. When disaster hit and our team was split up, scattered through the endless cold tunnels, I somehow survived. Now I'm lost, and alone, and scared, and there's something horrible in here. Lucky me.

Mild-mannered sheep farmer Albert Stark is fed up with the harsh life of the American frontier, where it seems everything and anything can kill you: Duels at high noon. Barroom brawls. Poisonous snakes. Cholera-infected drinking water. Tumbleweed abrasion. Something called “toe-foot.” Even a trip to the outhouse. Yes, there are a million ways to die in the wild, wild West, and Albert plans to avoid them all. Some people think that makes him a coward. Albert calls it common sense.

Fresh off of a victorious treasure hunt and rescue mission in South America, Addison Cooke just can't seem to steer clear of rogue bandits, pesky booby traps, and secret treasure troves. Addison's aunt and uncle, on the other hand, are none too happy about their habit of attracting kidnappers. When they become pawns in a dangerous gang's plan to steal the most prized possession of the notorious Mongolian leader Genghis Khan, Addison and his friends find themselves once again caught in the middle of a multi-million-dollar international heist.

A one-in-ten-billion natural disaster devastates Chicago. A Jewish comedian, his most devoted fan, and the city’s mayor must struggle to move forward while the world—quite literally—caves beneath their feet. With this polyphonic tale of Chicago-style politics and political correctness, stand-up comedy and Jewish identity, celebrity, drugs, and animal psychology, Levin has constructed a monument to laughter, love, art, and resilience in an age of spectacular loss.

Der Zombie Survival Guide ist der Schlüssel zur erfolgreichen Abwehr von Untoten, die eine ständige Bedrohung für den Menschen darstellen. Mittels umfassender Informationen deckt dieser Überlebensführer das ganze Spektrum möglicher Angriffs- und Abwehrtechniken ab. Er gibt Ratschläge zu zombiesicherem Wohnen, erläutert Physiologie und typische Verhaltensmuster von Zombies und beschreibt die wichtigsten Utensilien im Kampf gegen diese hinterhältigen Gegner.

This might sound funny to you right now, but what if it happens? You would be glad you have listened to this book. Plus, it is possible for you to use some ideas here for real emergencies, like typhoons, tsunami or earthquake. How Zombies Come into Being. You must have seen at least a dozen films depicting zombies eating flesh and taking over an entire metropolis, but, hey, where do zombies originate and why do they enjoy eating brains that much?

We guarantee this is the only tool you need to survive the zombie apocalypse. Okay, that's not really true. But when the SHTF, you're going to want a survival guide that's not just geared toward day-to-day survival. You'll need one that addresses the essential skills for true nourishment of the human spirit.

Kerri Louise is Mean Mommy! With her fearless and hilarious attitude toward modern motherhood, comic Kerri Louise tells all and never holds back. Truthful and funny, Mean Mommy attempts to balance her career in the comedy trenches and stay grounded while raising three boys.

Part alien invasion story, part buddy comedy, and part workplace satire, After The Fall by Edward Ashton, author of Mickey7 (inspiration for the film Mickey 17), asks an important question: would humans really make great pets? Humans must be silent. Humans must be obedient. Humans must be good...

I have a confession. I hate bachelorette parties. A night of awkward dancing, penis-shaped straws and being told “you're next, Kaitlyn!” Even worse: It's hosted at a super swanky Miami club where I stick out like a sore thumb. Couldn’t get any worse, right?