Teen Pirate

Somehow, Allie always managed to attract every sociopath within a 100-click radius. Don't ask her how she did it. She chalked it up to the unlucky curse that had plagued her all her life. And Sloven the Slayer was no different. Luckily, her mama had taught her the advantage of a well-placed kick. After the attempt on her life and her team's betrayal, she tried to go back to her life, to ignore how lonely she was, to forget the nightmares that plagued her and the face of the one man she still wanted despite his lies. But life was never that simple.

Fact 437 - Allie was a piss poor bootlegger. It was laughable that her blackmailers expected her to create a truth serum. If they’d done their homework, they would’ve known her brewing capabilities were nil, she flunked chemistry, and her moonshine was on the toxic side. So for once in her unlucky life, luck was on her side...until she almost blew up the lab. Unfortunately, singed eyebrows were the least of her concern. Fact 543 - Aliens don't understand personal space. Nothing was off limits. If they weren’t asking about her heat cycle, males were sniffing her for compatibility.

C.S. Forester, creator of the beloved Horatio Hornblower series, takes young readers on an exciting adventure to the shores of Tripoli in North Africa. That's where, more than 200 years ago, the United States was threatened by "pirates" who snatched American merchant ships and imprisoned sailors - and the country's young, untested navy took on the task of fighting the pirates in their home waters.

Fact 384: Allie's bad luck knew no bounds. After surviving a pirate attack by the skin of her very unlucky teeth, she believes life will get better. It had to, right? Wrong, dead wrong. Literally dead. Fact 443: Revenge always bites you in the butt. One little prank leaves her as a prime murder suspect and her newfound friends in jail. If she can't prove her innocence, she can kiss what's left of her life goodbye - not that she had much of one to start.

It made complete sense that the girl terrified of flying and aliens would be drafted for colonization of an alien planet. Right? Right? In her mind, she had one choice. Desertion. But again...unlucky. She should've known better. A failed escape attempt leaves her chained to an airship chair with nothing but her bag, a vial of her family's super moonshine, and her anxiety for company.

Newbery Medal winner Armstrong Sperry has such an affinity for life on the high seas that his readers will imagine themselves right beside the bold John Paul Jones, luring enemy craft into danger and engaging them in close combat. Jones, a talented young captain, became an invaluable figure in America's fight for independence when he offered his sailing skills to the Continental Navy.

A ship burns, sinking into the dark sea. There is only one survivor - a child hunted for the magic of her song. Hidden away on an isolated island, Lilette buries her magic deep, convinced it caused the deaths of those she loves. But she can’t run from who she is. And when her secret is revealed, the only thing that can save her is her song. It’s time to rise up and become what she was always meant to be. The most powerful witch ever born.

Here it is! The recording fans have been asking for! A recording that contains the hilarious and completely captivating tale of Dirty Joe, a pirate who steals socks, and his equally odious sister, Stinky Annie, who steals underwear.