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Advice Not Given
- A Guide to Getting Over Yourself
- Narrated by: Mark Epstein MD
- Length: 6 hrs and 12 mins
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Advice Not Given
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Buy it with
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Going to Pieces without Falling Apart
- A Buddhist Perspective on Wholeness
- Written by: Mark Epstein MD
- Narrated by: Patrick Lawlor
- Length: 5 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 17
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 14
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 14
Weaving together the accumulated wisdom of his two worlds - Buddhism and Western psychotherapy - Mark Epstein shows how "the happiness that we seek depends on our ability to balance the ego's need to do with our inherent capacity to be." He encourages us to relax the ever-vigilant mind in order to experience the freedom that comes only from relinquishing control.
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5 out of 5 stars
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excellent
- By Caleb on 2019-01-16
Written by: Mark Epstein MD
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The Zen of Therapy
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- Narrated by: Mark Epstein
- Length: 8 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 5
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 3
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 3
For years, Dr. Mark Epstein kept his beliefs as a Buddhist separate from his work as a psychiatrist. Content to use his training in mindfulness as a private resource, he trusted that the Buddhist influence could, and should, remain invisible. But as he became more forthcoming with his patients about his personal spiritual leanings, he was surprised to learn how many were eager to learn more. The divisions between the psychological, emotional, and the spiritual, he soon realized, were not as distinct as one might think.
Written by: Mark Epstein
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The Trauma of Everyday Life
- Written by: Mark Epstein MD
- Narrated by: Walter Dixon
- Length: 6 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 7
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Performance3.5 out of 5 stars 6
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 6
Trauma does not just happen to a few unlucky people; it is the bedrock of our psychology. Death and illness touch us all, but even the everyday sufferings of loneliness and fear are traumatic. In The Trauma of Everyday Life renowned psychiatrist and author of Thoughts Without a Thinker, Mark Epstein uncovers the transformational potential of trauma, revealing how it can be used for the mind's own development. Western psychology teaches that if we understand the cause of trauma, we might move past it while many drawn to Eastern practices see meditation as a means of rising above, or distancing themselves from, their most difficult emotions.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Buddha sounds human.
- By Kelly Stone on 2019-12-16
Written by: Mark Epstein MD
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10% Happier
- How I Tamed the Voice in My Head, Reduced Stress Without Losing My Edge, and Found a Self-Help That Actually Works
- Written by: Dan Harris
- Narrated by: Dan Harris
- Length: 7 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 410
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 354
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 353
After having a nationally televised panic attack on Good Morning America, Dan Harris knew he had to make some changes. A lifelong nonbeliever, he found himself on a bizarre adventure, involving a disgraced pastor, a mysterious self-help guru, and a gaggle of brain scientists.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Happy I heard this book (with caveats)
- By kd on 2018-02-08
Written by: Dan Harris
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How We Live Is How We Die
- Written by: Pema Chödrön
- Narrated by: Olivia Darnley
- Length: 6 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 9
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 8
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Story5 out of 5 stars 8
As much as we might try to resist, endings happen in every moment—the end of a breath, the end of a day, the end of a relationship, and ultimately the end of life. And accompanying each ending is a beginning, though it may be unclear what the beginning holds. In How We Live Is How We Die, Pema Chödrön shares her wisdom for working with this flow of life—learning to live with ease, joy, and compassion through uncertainty, embracing new beginnings, and ultimately preparing for death with curiosity and openness rather than fear.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Deep wisdom
- By Silla von Brandenstein on 2023-05-12
Written by: Pema Chödrön
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Buddhism Without Beliefs
- A Contemporary Guide to Awakening
- Written by: Stephen Batchelor
- Narrated by: Stephen Batchelor
- Length: 4 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 20
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 17
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 17
Before it was a religion, a culture, or even a system of meditation, what was Buddhism? On Buddhism Without Beliefs, celebrated teacher, translator, and former Buddhist monk Stephen Batchelor takes us back to the first years after the Buddha's awakening to reveal the root insights of Buddhism hidden beneath centuries of history and interpretation.
-
2 out of 5 stars
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Disappointing
- By Robert Peck on 2020-05-03
Written by: Stephen Batchelor
-
Going to Pieces without Falling Apart
- A Buddhist Perspective on Wholeness
- Written by: Mark Epstein MD
- Narrated by: Patrick Lawlor
- Length: 5 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 17
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 14
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 14
Weaving together the accumulated wisdom of his two worlds - Buddhism and Western psychotherapy - Mark Epstein shows how "the happiness that we seek depends on our ability to balance the ego's need to do with our inherent capacity to be." He encourages us to relax the ever-vigilant mind in order to experience the freedom that comes only from relinquishing control.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
excellent
- By Caleb on 2019-01-16
Written by: Mark Epstein MD
-
The Zen of Therapy
- Uncovering a Hidden Kindness in Life
- Written by: Mark Epstein
- Narrated by: Mark Epstein
- Length: 8 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall5 out of 5 stars 5
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 3
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 3
For years, Dr. Mark Epstein kept his beliefs as a Buddhist separate from his work as a psychiatrist. Content to use his training in mindfulness as a private resource, he trusted that the Buddhist influence could, and should, remain invisible. But as he became more forthcoming with his patients about his personal spiritual leanings, he was surprised to learn how many were eager to learn more. The divisions between the psychological, emotional, and the spiritual, he soon realized, were not as distinct as one might think.
Written by: Mark Epstein
-
The Trauma of Everyday Life
- Written by: Mark Epstein MD
- Narrated by: Walter Dixon
- Length: 6 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 7
-
Performance3.5 out of 5 stars 6
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 6
Trauma does not just happen to a few unlucky people; it is the bedrock of our psychology. Death and illness touch us all, but even the everyday sufferings of loneliness and fear are traumatic. In The Trauma of Everyday Life renowned psychiatrist and author of Thoughts Without a Thinker, Mark Epstein uncovers the transformational potential of trauma, revealing how it can be used for the mind's own development. Western psychology teaches that if we understand the cause of trauma, we might move past it while many drawn to Eastern practices see meditation as a means of rising above, or distancing themselves from, their most difficult emotions.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
Buddha sounds human.
- By Kelly Stone on 2019-12-16
Written by: Mark Epstein MD
-
10% Happier
- How I Tamed the Voice in My Head, Reduced Stress Without Losing My Edge, and Found a Self-Help That Actually Works
- Written by: Dan Harris
- Narrated by: Dan Harris
- Length: 7 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 410
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 354
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 353
After having a nationally televised panic attack on Good Morning America, Dan Harris knew he had to make some changes. A lifelong nonbeliever, he found himself on a bizarre adventure, involving a disgraced pastor, a mysterious self-help guru, and a gaggle of brain scientists.
-
4 out of 5 stars
-
Happy I heard this book (with caveats)
- By kd on 2018-02-08
Written by: Dan Harris
-
How We Live Is How We Die
- Written by: Pema Chödrön
- Narrated by: Olivia Darnley
- Length: 6 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 9
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 8
-
Story5 out of 5 stars 8
As much as we might try to resist, endings happen in every moment—the end of a breath, the end of a day, the end of a relationship, and ultimately the end of life. And accompanying each ending is a beginning, though it may be unclear what the beginning holds. In How We Live Is How We Die, Pema Chödrön shares her wisdom for working with this flow of life—learning to live with ease, joy, and compassion through uncertainty, embracing new beginnings, and ultimately preparing for death with curiosity and openness rather than fear.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
Deep wisdom
- By Silla von Brandenstein on 2023-05-12
Written by: Pema Chödrön
-
Buddhism Without Beliefs
- A Contemporary Guide to Awakening
- Written by: Stephen Batchelor
- Narrated by: Stephen Batchelor
- Length: 4 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 20
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 17
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 17
Before it was a religion, a culture, or even a system of meditation, what was Buddhism? On Buddhism Without Beliefs, celebrated teacher, translator, and former Buddhist monk Stephen Batchelor takes us back to the first years after the Buddha's awakening to reveal the root insights of Buddhism hidden beneath centuries of history and interpretation.
-
2 out of 5 stars
-
Disappointing
- By Robert Peck on 2020-05-03
Written by: Stephen Batchelor
Publisher's Summary
"Most people will never find a great psychiatrist or a great Buddhist teacher, but Mark Epstein is both, and the wisdom he imparts in Advice Not Given is an act of generosity and compassion. The book is a tonic for the ailments of our time." (Ann Patchett, New York Times best-selling author of Commonwealth)
Our ego, and its accompanying sense of nagging self-doubt as we work to be bigger, better, smarter, and more in control, is one affliction we all share. And while our ego claims to have our best interests at heart, in its never-ending pursuit of attention and power, it sabotages the very goals it sets to achieve. In Advice Not Given, renowned psychiatrist and author Dr. Mark Epstein presents a how-to guide rooted in two traditions, Buddhism and Western psychotherapy, devoted to maximizing the human potential for living a better life.
Our ego, and its accompanying sense of nagging self-doubt as we work to be bigger, better, smarter, and more in control, is one affliction we all share. And, while our ego claims to have our best interests at heart, in its never-ending pursuit of attention and power, it sabotages the very goals it sets to achieve. In Advice Not Given, Dr. Mark Epstein reveals how Buddhism and Western psychotherapy, two traditions that developed in entirely different times and places and, until recently, had nothing to do with each other, both identify the ego as the limiting factor in our well-being, and both come to the same conclusion: When we give the ego free reign, we suffer; but when it learns to let go, we are free.
With great insight, and in a deeply personal style, Epstein offers listeners a how-to guide that refuses a quick fix, grounded in two traditions devoted to maximizing the human potential for living a better life. Using the Eightfold Path, eight areas of self-reflection that Buddhists believe necessary for enlightenment, as his scaffolding, Epstein looks back productively on his own experience and that of his patients. While the ideas of the Eightfold Path are as old as Buddhism itself, when informed by the sensibility of Western psychotherapy, they become something more: a road map for spiritual and psychological growth, a way of dealing with the intractable problem of the ego. Breaking down the wall between East and West, Epstein brings a Buddhist sensibility to therapy and a therapist's practicality to Buddhism. Speaking clearly and directly, he offers a rethinking of mindfulness that encourages people to be more watchful of their ego, an idea with a strong foothold in Buddhism but now for the first time applied in the context of psychotherapy.
Our ego is at once our biggest obstacle and our greatest hope. We can be at its mercy or we can learn to mold it. Completely unique and practical, Epstein's advice can be used by all - each in his or her own way - and will provide wise counsel in a confusing world. After all, as he says, "Our egos can use all the help they can get."
What the critics say
“Most people will never find a great psychiatrist or a great Buddhist teacher, but Mark Epstein is both, and the wisdom he imparts in Advice Not Given is an act of generosity and compassion. The book is a tonic for the ailments of our time.” (Ann Patchett, New York Times best-selling author of Commonwealth)
“Mark Epstein’s Advice Not Given continues his important, fascinating work in exceptionally lucid language. It also offers its readers a collection of fables, vignettes, and personal revelations with the true capacity to rearrange one’s perspective, even change one’s life. I suspect many of these offerings will stay with me for the long haul, for which I’m very grateful.” (Maggie Nelson, New York Times best-selling author of The Argonauts)
“Epstein’s book of practical suggestions will leave readers educated, inspired, and equipped with new tools for psychological health.” (Publishers Weekly, starred review)
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What listeners say about Advice Not Given
Average Customer RatingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Jacquie
- 2018-02-18
amazing book
This is a wonderfully insightful and easy to 'read' book. it is a perfect blend of psychotherapy and Buddhism.
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2 people found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Adam Davies
- 2023-04-11
Good listen.
I enjoyed this book because of the examples and stories used, also Dr Epstein uses personal examples. I also am very much intrigued with using meditative practices and psychotherapy. So I enjoyed this book. Thank you.
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Overall2 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story1 out of 5 stars
- amanda
- 2019-04-11
This book needs to be Me Too#ed out of existance
I REALLY wanted to like this, disturbing, disturbing book. And the author's voice is hypnotic, however the gentleness of his voice belies the gender violence in his message. He uses female patients as most of his examples and his message is creepy as duck.
For instance, he tells the story of a woman who sought help from a famous male psychiayrist who made her lie naked on a table (at the first appointment), examined her body (can't remember if this was a physical or visual examination but she was there for a mental health problem) and then told her that " your problem is you don't know how to flirt". I really hope she wasn't they're for PTSD from sexual abuse. The author then, rather than using this as an example of the abuse of power in psychiatric relationships, USES THIS AS AN EXAMPLE OF THE IMPORTANCE OF FLIRTING. Seriously, this moment that would have been traumatic and insulting and sexist to most of us (heterosexual men, if you're not getting my point, ask yourselves how you'd feel if a male psychiatrist pulled this stunt on you) as an illustration of the importance of flirting.
In another example a patient (mind you a therapy patient, not a Buddhism student) who works during the day to support herself and her stay-at-home-husband is upset at the husband because he is not doing his share of the labor which is supposed to be the housework. The author's advice (and he seems a little angry with her frankly) is that she should do it, it's not a big deal, so she should do it. She should work to support her unemployed husband, and then come home and do the housework for him, that's seriously the author's advice.
In another example he forgets, FORGETS, that a female therapy client told him about childhood sexual abuse, and then isn't even ashamed of forgetting. I just can't.
There's other stuff, but I think I blocked a lot of it out.
Some of Buddhism is about enduring without judgement or complaint. Accepting defeat and offering up the victory. Having a playful attitude toward life. But there are female Buddhism authors like Pema Chodron and Tara Brach who could address this with us women (of course for some reason they teach it a little different). It shouldn't be coming from a man. and it's seriously bent how much emphasis he puts on this. He could have taught all of these concepts using examples involving men. That he uses women is significant, and telling, and disturbing. He is defending the patriarchy and using his Buddhism book to mansplain his rationale.
Buddhism at its worst had a problem with the values it teaches perpetuating the worst of the inequalities of the status quo. This is that. But it doesn't have to. This man could have used this book to teach MEN to accept defeat and offer up the victory, used the Buddhism to teach men how not to harm women. He just doesn't.
If you want to read some amazing Buddhism, start with Pema Chodron's "When Things Fall Apart". Read Thick Nhat Hanh's books (anything he narrates himself, otherwise you miss out on his amazing sense of humor). Read anything else by Pema Chodron. If you want to hear from a therapist, read Tara Brach. Also, for sure read Radical Dharma (you'll have to buy an actual physical book, but you should).
Don't fall for this man's melodious voice. It's a box of anthrax with pretty wrapping paper on it.
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54 people found this helpful
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Overall2 out of 5 stars
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Performance2 out of 5 stars
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Story3 out of 5 stars
- Jim
- 2018-06-07
An author's personal reflections
I started the book hoping that it would talk more specifically about the relationship / integration between Buddhist practices and Western psychology in practical ways. There are some very good nuggets here and there, but they are scattered among a lot of the author's personal reflections, journey, etc., which, given what I was hoping to hear, was too high an investment for the return. In terms of the narration, the author reads his own book here. While I don't doubt that his voice and manner are excellent in a counseling setting, I found it difficult at times to stay engaged.
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16 people found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
- J. S.
- 2018-10-19
This book can actually change your view
Mark Epstein's view of eight fold path and his translation of the word "sama" as being "equal, just, or balanced" as opposed to "correct" can actually change the outlook of the eight fold path and Buddhism for the beginner. His use of personal experiences to explain each aspect really help to drive things home. There are a lot of things you can miss if you only half listen to this book or start listening with pre conceived notions.
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11 people found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story4 out of 5 stars
- Rowen C
- 2018-01-25
Insight
Mark gives solid life advice in this book. Advice or perspective that allowed me to break free from my own expectations of what meditation is and is not. Reading it, I feel I am becoming a better brother, uncle, lover, son, and much more.
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9 people found this helpful
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Overall3 out of 5 stars
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Performance2 out of 5 stars
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Story3 out of 5 stars
- Jefesita
- 2018-06-21
So What Next?
This book's main theme seemed to be finding yourself using Buddhist principles . The author talked too much about himself. Yes, there were case histories of different people but nothing that I feel the average joe blow could relate to. Left me with feeling ... so after all that now what?
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4 people found this helpful
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Overall3 out of 5 stars
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Performance3 out of 5 stars
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Story4 out of 5 stars
- Gerald Collier
- 2019-04-24
Not a good as I hoped
I got this book because I had done 10% Happier and loved the informal tone. I wanted to continue what I had discovered from that book here and Epstein was recomend. However, I found this book too cerebral for a beginner, I think. I was also disappointed to not find any real practical tips for meditation. Seemed to be more centered on Buddhist beliefs in general. i did get something out the journey though...
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3 people found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Anonymous User
- 2018-05-26
Like a good fríend
That brings about truth, a sense of quiet comfort you want to meet again and again.
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3 people found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Lisa
- 2018-04-02
Touchingly Human, Sensitive, Funny Yet Humane
Where does Advice Not Given rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?
I rarely write reviews but I was moved to write one in this case. I am not sure where I first saw an excerpt that got my attention, and I almost didn't buy since I am not always eager to pick up 'self-help' books, but I am so glad I did. It was definitely not a 'self-help' book. Yet it was informative, gave some great food for thought and the illustrative stories really carried the points he was trying to make. His approach created space for thoughtfulness and consideration... in part because his treatment of the material was very gentle and compassionate. Well worth the listen.
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3 people found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Brad F. Koch
- 2018-02-12
Wonderful
Accessible and brilliant. Highly recommended. Offering clear guidance for how to better relate to our own ego, to each other, and to life itself.
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3 people found this helpful
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Overall4 out of 5 stars
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Performance4 out of 5 stars
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Story4 out of 5 stars
- Nix Pascal
- 2018-01-30
Easy to follow and insightful
I listened to this straight through while busy with other tasks and thoroughly enjoyed it. It was easy to follow and offered much insight.
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3 people found this helpful