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Andrea Vernon and the Corporation for UltraHuman Protection

Written by: Alexander C. Kane
Narrated by: Bahni Turpin
Series: Andrea Vernon, Book 1
Length: 8 hrs and 50 mins
4.5 out of 5 stars (67 ratings)

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Publisher's Summary

Think superheroes are tough? Try having one for a boss, or co-worker. That’s the predicament Andrea Vernon finds herself in as the heroine of Alexander C. Kane’s debut audiobook. Drowning in debt, and forced to move back into her parents’ Queens apartment, Andrea starts looking for a job. Luckily for her, she finds herself recruited—well, really kidnapped—by the Corporation for UltraHuman Protection (C.U.P.), an organization that deploys superheroes. Suddenly Andrea must contend with co-workers who can shoot lightning from their fingertips, face the imminent destruction of humanity, and juggle a fledgling romance with a giant lumberjack. It’s all in a day’s work for the would-be novelist turned superstar secretary.

Audible Hall of Fame narrator Bahni Turpin is perfectly cast as a normal person finding herself in abnormal circumstances. Turpin brings to life an entire cast of quirky characters, along with their heroically funny antics in the cubicle next door. If you’ve ever wondered what a genetically altered rhinoceros sounds like, or needed to take a break from your own office drudgery, this is the comedy for you.
 

©2017 Alexander C. Kane (P)2017 Audible Originals, LLC.
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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Utter hilarity from start to finish

One of the funniest listens I've had in some time! I'm not one to laugh out loud while listening to a book, but this one got me several times.

2 people found this helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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Laugh out loud funny

I’m glad I gave this one a try. Superhero hi-jinx meets office rom-com. The narration is fantastic. Each character comes to life with a distinctive sound. Never dull, this was both funny, exciting, and a great satire of the insurance world. I hope to hear about CUP’s expansion to Europe!!

2 people found this helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

What if 'Welcome to Night Vale' met 'Wilds Cards'?

This story is incredible, but it's the narration that really brings it to life. At one point I really did believe I was listening to a Tiger Man from India conversing with Hasidic Jew made of Diamonds from Space.

That brings me to the headline up there.
If you're familiar with George R.R Martin's 'Wild Cards' series then you'll won't feel too out of place jumping into this version of New York where 'Super-Stuff' just kinda happens.
If you've heard anything from 'Welcome to Night Vale' then you may be familiar with mundane operations based in bizzare worlds (it even has unknowable Upper Managment)

If you don't know what I'm talking about then just know that this is a great story about a boring part of an exciting universe.
But as I've stated before it's really the narrator which brings everything together.
The voices are suitably unique to each character that lends itself greatly to some kind of sense of immersion. (I say 'some kind' because I can only imagine Mrs.O as that Lamb/Sheep lady in Zootopia, which I doubt they were going for)

All-in-all I'd say that recommending this book is easier then dropping an ice cream off the back of a spooked steed.

1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

Super heros and office politics

Andrea becomes an administrative assistant at a corporation that employs super heroes to protect the earth from super villains. She is contractually obligated to not ask questions. The story is light hearted but of course involves a world saving fight at the end. The narrative oscillates between super hero stuff and office management, politics, marketing, sales etc. The performance is very good and engaging and the book is entertaining.

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The Puns, the Puns!

This was a fresh take on the superhero genre. Andrea is smart, funny and commitment shy. She works for a private superhero contractor as an Administrative Assistant. The hilarity starts from the moment not one, but two super heroes break into her apartment to take her to a job interview. Persephone Oh, Andrea's boss is a cliche spouting Georgian who is a steel magnolia. There are so many superhero/supervillan tropes that Alexander C. Kane takes "The Big Axe" to that the novel never fails to surprise and amaze. I loved that there were superheroes of all ethnicities who find representation in this book. Oh, and someone get Ms. Oh a moon base before she gets as mad as a pumpkin the day after Halloween.

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Interesting, out there story!

A little off the beaten track story with humour throughout. Not for everyone, for sure, but worth a listen.

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So much fun!

Here’s an example of how the word on the page coupled with a talented voice can make the story whole. I can’t imagine reading this and enjoying it so much! It’s insane fun where the mundane details of work and a corporation are sent up in the most refreshing way that’s to the author’s insight. Add the narrator’s comic timing, voice work and obvious enthusiasm and the whole thing flies along irresistibly at a breakneck pace! I’m getting the next one!

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    2 out of 5 stars

Not bad but really not my cup of tea.

The book has a gonzo feel to it that has more in common with the Sunday funnies comics than with super hero comics in general.

I found several of the characters particularly grating. The Big Axe talking about The Big Axe in the third person was bad but the southern folksie-isms were worse.

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    1 out of 5 stars
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  • G. Eytcheson
  • 2019-05-24

If Sharknado were a book...

If the movie Sharknado were an audio book, it would be this book. It is as if a group of 8 year old boys got together and wrote down every cool and awesome superhero idea they could think of and there was no one in the group to say "no, that's dumb", but instead they said "yeah, and let's give him hands made of diamonds!" or "he has a big axe, so let's name him The Big Axe!".

The narrator was pretty good, and I pity her for having to read this book at all, much less having to have her name publicly associated with it.

57 people found this helpful

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    1 out of 5 stars
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  • Phx17
  • 2020-04-10

SouthPark + The Office with superheroes - but bad

I can get into oddball comedies about superheroes with quirky powers (The Sidekick Initiative, with superhero The Butterfly King), fresh takes on new genres (Second Hand Curses on fairy tale characters forming a Robin Hood style gang), and so wrong, but so funny fantasy that skewers races, genders, and religions without mercy (A Dirty Job, irreverently turning an average joe into a kind of clueless grim reaper). In sum, I can handle violence, sex, profanity, and off color humor... but only if done well.

This book was not done well. I made it three hours in before I gave up. This book is just an endless series of jokes about super heroes with random powers doing the daily office grind in competing corporations, strung together without meaningful plot or character development. Superhero, sex/anatomy, and accent gags - that’s it.

The tone is all over the place. It’s like the author got his ideas for superpowers by asking his five year old what would be cool (Bronx Bull, Kitchen Sink, Triple Brain) Then, the author goes to his teenager and asks about jokes, whereupon he receives the expected focus on bodily functions (a teleportation power with a diarrhea side effect) and Beavis & Butthead style anatomy/sex jokes (lots of references to the size of penises and things like “Donkey orgies”). Then the author goes to his wife, who urges him to be inclusive and woke, so he creates diversity with a diamond like alien Rabbi, an Asian Lightning Wong, etc.... but only succeeds in creating cringeworthy characters for the narrator to embrace with strong stereotyped accents (every time narrator says “ACHHMed” it’s like she’s going to cough up a hairball).

No depth whatsoever made this such a dull, forgettable listen that I regret paying for this ... even having purchased this super cheap.

35 people found this helpful

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    4 out of 5 stars
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  • M.Jane Wisch
  • 2018-08-07

Unexpected

I took a chance and was surprised . Enjoyed the book made a boring commute fun. Will try another by this author and venue.

21 people found this helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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  • Arthur D. Rich
  • 2017-08-26

A Normal Life in an Abnormal World

Andrea Vernon is an amusing spin on the super-hero genre. The humorous tale explores a perfectly normal office worker who must navigate the mundane world of her bureaucratic job in a company of super-powered government contractors. The story feels like The Incredibles or The Tick meets Office Space or Arrested Development. I found Andrea to be a strangely relatable character as I too have found myself thrown into a job I was ill-prepared for and forced to rise to the occasion. I would gladly recommend this book to anyone who is looking for a good laugh and and an enjoyable story.

126 people found this helpful

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  • Robyn T. Fink
  • 2017-10-05

“Men In Black” meets “Parks and Recreation”

'Andrea Vernon and the Corporation for Ultrahuman Protection' is your typical workplace satire. Typical, that is, if your workplace includes superheroes. You'll meet great characters like Rabbi Diamond (a diamond-skinned alien who crash landed on Earth as an infant and was adopted by an Orthodox Jewish couple), King Tiger (body of a man, head of a tiger, loves three-piece suits), and Inspector Well Actually (his super power is correcting people). It's equal parts corporate comedy, silly superhero puns, and an exciting adventure involving a giant glowing egg. I guarantee you will laugh out loud while listening!

107 people found this helpful

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  • Annelise
  • 2017-10-16

This needs to be a tv series!

This book is entertaining and unique. The Office meets Justice league, set in New York. Bahni Turpin does an amazing job bringing each character to life.
This is a short book that made commuting way better!

20 people found this helpful

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    4 out of 5 stars
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  • Amazon Customer
  • 2018-03-09

I AM SO OVER SUPERHEROS....however

I am done with superheros and zombies, but I got this book due to one reviewer saying it was similar to Good Omens. Well, Good Omens it's not. I will shout for joy when I find another book like Good Omens. But it is a good book. The business side of superhero industry is very funny. I even LOL'd which is super rare for me. I have been on the hunt for books like this and Good Omens for a long time. I'm glad I found it, it's good.

71 people found this helpful

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  • Kenia
  • 2017-09-19

Great Narration!

This was a really funny book & the narrator is everything! The end of the book would have been funny regardless of who was reading, but her voices just made the laughter bubble out of me.

54 people found this helpful

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  • Michelle A Witt
  • 2017-09-05

Great Story

2 things that stand out for me.

1. I am not a sci-fi fan but the cover of this book caught my attention and I had to read it. I am so glad I did. Very funny story and it kept my interest. I cannot tell you how many times I was laughing out loud!

2. I was worried my attention span would not be good with an audible book. I am very happy to say this was not the case. Bahni Turpin does such a great job drawing you in to the characters and the story. She brought them all to life and that was so enjoyable! I feel like I know them all too well.

I look forward to getting this book in hardcopy and will tell others about this good read.

28 people found this helpful

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  • electricianluke
  • 2017-08-25

Fun for the grown up comic fan.

Would you listen to Andrea Vernon and the Corporation for UltraHuman Protection again? Why?

Yes. To try to memorize all of Ms. Oh's colloquialisms.

What other book might you compare Andrea Vernon and the Corporation for UltraHuman Protection to and why?

Neil Gaimen's "Good Omens"
It takes a genre that we are familiar with and pokes holes in it's self seriousness by adding the mundane details and indignities of navigating everyday professional life.

Which character – as performed by Bahni Turpin – was your favorite?

Inspector Well Actually was awful and hilarious.

Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?

The scene with Scott on his way to make the pitch to the Bronx public service commission was hilarious.

Any additional comments?

If your on the fence whether or not this book is worth your credit, just burn the credit. If it seems like something you would be interested in, you will like it.

57 people found this helpful