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Baby's First Book of Seriously F--ked-Up Shit cover art

Baby's First Book of Seriously F--ked-Up Shit

Written by: Robert Devereaux
Narrated by: Edoardo Ballerini
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Publisher's Summary

Lambent Light Publishing presents nine stories of the strange, the gross, and the just plain f--ked up from Robert Devereaux, one of the most original voices in fantastic fiction.

  • “Showdown at Stinking Springs” - A tall-tale faceoff in a dusty town. No guns drawn, just two seductive sex-slingers pitched against each other in a town due to be consumed in a series of libido-whipped firestorms.
  • “Clap If You Believe” - When Alex courts a winged pixie no taller than his index finger, it falls to her normal-sized parents to determine if he’s the right kind of weirdo to properly love and care for their daughter.
  • “Ridi, Bobo” - Clown noir told strictly in mime. A cheating wife, her suspicious husband, two young sons, and a weepy-faced detective spin this tragic tale of the Big Top. 
  • “Lil’ Miss Ultrasound” - A beauty contest for third-trimester fetuses, ferocious competition among their pregnant moms, and a judge with a most peculiar perversion indeed. 
  • “Bucky Goes to Church” - A young teen takes his revenge on a bullying town, only to receive an unexpected visit from God Almighty herself. 
  • “Fructus in Eden” - Suppose Adam and Eve had been forgiven their first transgression. And their second transgression. This Edenic foursome might have been the result. 
  • “One Flesh: A Cautionary Tale” - A savage tale loaded with unspeakable acts as a reincarnated - or so they believe - father-and-son pair spars over the choicest body parts of their widows.
  • “The Slobbering Tongue That Ate the Frightfully Huge Woman” - A story that pays homage to the B-movie schlock shown at '50s and '60s drive-ins. Climax: a human dildo at the Grand Canyon.
  • “Holy Fast, Holy Feast” - Gurus, zombies, and young folk trying to survive in downtown Montreal struggle in this metafictional stew of love, lust, and terror.

Edoardo Ballerini, two-time Audie award winner as best male narrator, lends his considerable talents to these twisted tales of horror and dark fantasy.

©2013 Robert Devereaux (P)2020 Robert Devereaux

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