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Publisher's Summary

Today millions of kids are stuck in a world that doesn't respect, support, or embrace who they really are - these are what Deborah Reber is calling the “differently wired” kids, the one in five children with ADHD, dyslexia, Asperger’s, giftedness, anxiety, sensory processing disorder, and other neurodifferences. Their challenges are many. But for the parents who love them, the challenges are just as hard - struggling to find the right school, the right therapist, the right parenting group while feeling isolated and harboring endless internal doubts about what’s normal, what’s not, and how to handle it all.     

But now there’s hope. Written by Deborah Reber, a best-selling author and mother in the midst of an eye-opening journey with her son who is twice exceptional (he has ADHD, Asperger’s, and is highly gifted), Differently Wired is a how-to, a manifesto, a book of wise advice, and the best kind of been-there, done-that companion.     

On the one hand it’s a book of saying NO, and how it’s time to say no to trying to fit your round-peg kid into society’s square holes, no to educational and social systems that don’t respect your child, no to the anxiety and fear that keep parents stuck. And then it’s a book of YES. By offering 18 paradigm shifts - what she calls “tilts” - Reber shows how to change everything. How to “Get Out of Isolation and Connect.” “Stop Fighting Who Your Child Is and Lean In.” “Let Go of What Others Think.” “Create a World Where Your Child Can Feel Secure.” “Find Your People (and Ditch the Rest).” “Help Your Kids Embrace Self-Discovery.” And through these alternative ways of being, discover how to stay open, pay attention, and become an exceptional parent to your exceptional child.

©2018 Deborah Reber (P)2018 Audible, Inc.

What listeners say about Differently Wired

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Usefull informations

This book contains usefull informations but the story is more about the parents than the autistic child.
I expected more informations to help me understand differently wired children.

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Great resource for parents of quirky kids

If you feel lost or alone because your kid is “that kid” at school or at the playground, I highly recommend reading this book along with all the material available on the TILT Parenting website. Odds are you’ll even learn a little bit more about yourself, after all the apple does not fall far from the tree!

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  • LCP
  • 2018-12-21

Most amazing parenting book I've read.

Parenting, especially parenting children who are differently wired, doesn't come with an instruction manual ... until now. This book won't solve every parenting dilemma, of course, but it will give you a solid place to start your journey with your differently wired child. Debbie provides SO many resources and tips in this book, but, more importantly, she gives parents the peace of mind that they are NOT alone on this wild and wonderful adventure. Moreover, she paves the path for EMBRACING neurodiversity. I wholeheartedly recommend this book to EVERY parent, teacher, coach ... basically anyone who ever interacts with kids.

I also LOVE that the author read her own book ... I so appreciate hearing the author's story in her own voice!

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  • Cara
  • 2021-07-27

Helpful narrative, less than helpful application

I really wanted to like this book and did indeed really resonate with her story as a fellow mother of a 2e kid. I also really appreciated her advice that we as parents need to advocate for our kids and love and nurture them them as they are.

However, I got really tired of hearing the buzz words “your truth” over and over again. While our kids need to know they matter, she seemed to abdicate them from any sort of responsibility. One of my biggest parenting struggles has been differentiating between meltdowns and tantrums. She implies they are all meltdowns.

Worth the read and worth recommending to family members who “don’t get it” but overall I wish she’d gone deeper.

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  • Trudy Owens
  • 2019-01-01

very well thought out but not for everyone

I came to this book hoping to learn how to better reach, teach, understand, and provide for my neurologically different students. This is not that book. This book IS for parents of the neurologically diverse.

I had to give up the book after several hours because the first half or more is a laundry list of the problems facing these parents. This was somewhat eye-opening for me, so that was good. Not until much later does Reber get into the solutions, which seem to be to organize, educate (yourself and others), advocate and be an activist, but you're still on your own. This may be true, but it was depressing for me (and probably is for these parents too) and ultimately not what I was looking for. I do not know how much help this book would actually be for parents of these diverse kids.

It seemed to me that Reber is trying to promote the concept that these increasingly numerous neurological differences (1 in 5 kids) are actually a step forward on the evolutionary path. I accept the possibility, but something in the presentation rubbed me the wrong way. Maybe I am just the type she has to fight so hard against, I don't know.

I am a strong proponent of authors never reading their own material. Reber missed some points of emphasis that another reader might have made, but she does pretty well almost all the time. My biggest gripe may sound petty, but if she hopes to get into public speaking as part of her advocacy, she needs to ditch the voice affectation called glottal, or vocal, fry. This is that unnatural creaky, lowest tone your voice can make that came into fashion among young women more than 10 years ago. Some researchers suggest that this is done to add weight to the words by giving them a man's voice. I don't know if that is true, but I do know that a woman with a message doesn't need a man's voice. This unnatural voice usage usually shows up at the ends of sentences but Reber starts in with it after just a word or two. The more I listened to the book, the more annoying it became.

To sum up, if you are parenting an exceptional child, you might find this book supportive of your struggle, but it is hard to get through if you are not that invested in the topic.

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  • LaChampita
  • 2021-12-31

The Book I needed

I didn't need another book on autism that tells me how to help with Tantrums. Ultimately they all say the same thing. This got down to the core of anxiety and fears as a parent of a differently wire child. It was a great read and exactly what I needed to hear!

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  • Melissa Beaulieu
  • 2020-07-28

Should have purchased sooner!

I have been a follower of Debby Reber's podcast at Tilt Parenting for a while, and love all the content there. After absorbing all the content available on her website I needed more, and this was book was just the thing. I only wish I would have purchased this book sooner. As a mother of two Twice Exceptional kiddos (and I suspect being an undiagnosed 2E person myself) this book truly plays on my heartstrings. I feel more connected, more in tune and more confident in my children and myself. My son has been listening to this audio book as well, and he also is loving it for the relatability. It is truly a must read!

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  • Jolene R.
  • 2019-11-05

Great book!

I really enjoyed this book. It was recommended on a blog where I was reading tips on helping my child to focus at school. This book is a great resource. It really helped me with my perception of what could be going on with my son. I really enjoyed the more positive viewpoints when we are so used to hearing all the negative talk. this gives me hope and possibility. I am excited to continue learning in this direction.

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  • Anonymous User
  • 2019-09-12

enjoyed and took notes

thank you! this was a great listen and I took some good notes and got inspiration to stick up for my 6 year old gifted child even though it's not the "nice" thing to do to stop being passive and fight for his success in the classroom. I am arming myself w the knowledge to help him find success and stop being punished for his boredom. I may start a FB page for gifted parents, or hopefully will find one.

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 2019-02-25

Inspirational

I related so much to Deborah and Asher' s story and found so much inspiration in knowing that tilting my perspective as a parent and leaning in, we could find the right path for our differently wired girl. I highly recommend this book to any parents who are struggling to find the right path for their differently wired child.

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  • Sandra Tudor
  • 2022-07-30

Everyone with a neurodiverse child in their life should read this book!

And as a grandmother of a four-year-old Nuro diverse child I found this book so hopeful and inspiring. Deborah Reber‘s thoughts, vulnerability, research and passion for the subject fills me with excitement for the future of my grandson. One of the things I love so much is this book is not a “how to “ book on all the things you need to do to try to make your child into something he is not. This is a book about acceptance and love for not only the neurodiverse child or children in your life, but for yourself as well. I’m inspired!

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  • Nicole C.
  • 2022-04-26

Highly recommended!

First off, I love that the author read the book herself! You can hear her genuine passion throughout and that made it feel even more relatable for me. While I can't say that I learned anything "new", per se...I definitely felt very understood and like I am not alone in this crazy journey! I finished this book with a fresh wind of encouragement and a replenish "toolbox" of directives to be mindful of with my children. I truly hope parents AND teachers will check this out.