A bad psychology book from a bad psychologist

I don't intend for this review to be mean, but I have to factually say some unkind things about this book.

First, good things about this book: the author reads very well. Good audio quality.

Everything else makes for a very bad book. There are numerous issues with the author's vision, approach and methodology. I can't list all of them here, but I'll start with the most problematic issues:

1/ The author itself doesn't seem like a good psychologist. She pretty much sounds like someone extremely happy to have been able to have taken a step back on life, and who now believes she attained wisdom. While anyone who took two or three steps back can see she still believes in a LOT of fallacies, myths, and globally did not deconstruct well her approach to life.

Many references are made to her dad, and it can be felt many, many times through the book that she still suffers from low self-esteem from their relationship, which is very fine, as long as you're not pretending to not suffer from self-esteem issues. The book kind of read like a whole "See how good I am, dad?". Which is not helped at all by the annoying tendency from almost any self-help book to make their author shine in the brightest possible light.

Similarly, the book holds a position against essentialism of character (i.e. there are no natural winners and losers, you can learn to succeed in life) but at the same time it is clear the author still holds a very essentialist approach. She still uses terms such as "winner" and "loser". Her choice of people to interview for the book also shows quite much a lot about her, i.e. how she buys in into the whole "rich entrepreneurs are just better people" popular american myth.

Simply put, the author stopped her world analysis way too early while being convinced that she now holds the ultimate truth. It is extremely cringe to listen to people like this. I don't think that makes for a good book, nor for a very good psychologist.

2/ The psychology is quite bad. For multiple reasons, but I will just have to quote two huge fallacies that the author commit.

First, her definition of "grit" keeps changing depending on her findings about that value. In the end, what she calls "grit" is actually nothing like the original word. Would you call "gritty" or "perseverant" someone who works a lot on a hobby because they love it so much? That seems like a stretch. But because the data shows that working on what you love makes you successful, the author labelize it as "gritty". Smells like a true scottsman fallacy.

Another huge fallacy the author commits is the survivor fallacy. By interviewing only successful people, she completely fails to nuance her argument. It makes as much sense as interviewing people who got rich playing the lottery, determining they all won the lottery, and therefore recommending that everyone plays the lottery. The author refuse to acknowledge the simple truth that perserverance and passion can - sometimes - lead to bad outcomes, especially when it's badly directed - Oh but there is a chapter about how you have to direct your grit in a smart direction! But without really explaining how. So basically the whole ad-hoc argument works in reverse. In the end, if you were successful, it means you applied the concepts in this book well (so the author is proven right), and if you were not, well you did not apply them well (so the author is proven right again). This is neither good science nor psychology, you cannot establish a theory starting from the conclusions.

There are some good arguments and interesting data in the book. But it's globally an extremely cringe read/listen, and the bulk of the argument often falls flat. It is often inspiring, which can be a good thing, except when it blinds you to the reality that the author just is not exposing a very good argument.

You can listen to it, but you should never takes what the author says at face value. There are some interesting parts, such as the "growth mindset" if you're not familiar with that already, althought I did not find the explanations for this great concept (which doesn't come from this author) to be particularly stellar.

For an alternative, I recommend "Atomic habits", which is way more grounded in reality and which presents a way better argument leading to actual changes to make you a happier person.

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5 people found this helpful

Un peu longuet

Le livre et les idées sont intéressantes mais alors qu'est-ce que c'est long! Sinon, le livre est lu par l'auteur, qui a une voix agréable.

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1 person found this helpful

Inspiring but lack of practical tools

Good book with inspiring stories but I would have loved to have more practical tools or concepts that can be applied in everyday life. For instance like the "one hard thing" that Angela and her family has.

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1 person found this helpful

A bit lackluster

It was very interesting but started going in circles at the halfway mark. I would’ve preferred less examples and more tips on how to train one’s grit. It also doesn’t really address the limits of thinking through the prism of grit without taking into account one’s possible toxic environment and hindering life experiences.

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great book

i recommend the book, it is well documented and very useful for parents and teachers.

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One of the best books I've read

A perfect balance of studies, research, and stories that aren't dramatized. An excellent piece on what I takes to achieve great things in life. A sound guide that should be shared.

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