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  • How Can I Get Through to You? Reconnecting Men and Women

  • Written by: Terrence Real
  • Narrated by: Terrence Real
  • Length: 5 hrs
  • 4.6 out of 5 stars (25 ratings)

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How Can I Get Through to You? Reconnecting Men and Women

Written by: Terrence Real
Narrated by: Terrence Real
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Publisher's Summary

Why is love between men and women so difficult? In this groundbreaking new book, best selling author Terrence Real analyzes the crisis in intimate relations, a crisis that has lasted more than a generation, yielding divorce rates of 40 to 50 percent. Our culture prepares us to fall in love, but it does not give us the skills we need to stay in love. Here Real offers a radical new vision of love and the practical tools with which to achieve it.

The current crisis is a product of changing gender roles, Real explains. In the past 30 years, women's roles have changed radically and men's have not. For the first time, adult women are asking their partners to access the very skills - emotional sensitivity, expressiveness, responsibility - that most men have had stamped out of them as boys. Patriarchal culture does not raise boys to be intimate; it raises them to be competitive performers. At the same time, girls are taught to be compliant and accommodating. The result is that men feel bewildered and unappreciated while women feel unheard and resentful. Conventional therapy, which reinforces "traditional" male roles, has failed. The demand for intimacy in marriage must be met with new skills.

Real draws on myth, literature, film, and heartrending stories of the men and women he treats to illustrate his compelling analysis. Breaking taboos about love, marriage, and passion, Real not only reconstructs gender roles but also shows that patriarchy's idealized model of love is impossibly flawed. He teaches partners to replace it with a love that acknowledges imperfections, and he then provides five Core Relational Skills designed to help every couple reach their full potential. Innovative, powerful, and eminently helpful, How Can I Get Through to You? is the book that every couple has been waiting for - and our culture needs.

©2002 Terrence Real, All Rights Reserved (P)2002 Simon & Schuster Inc., SOUND IDEAS Is an Imprint of Simon & Schuster Audio Division, Simon & Schuster Inc.

What listeners say about How Can I Get Through to You? Reconnecting Men and Women

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Honest, Kind, & Necessary

Thank you. I need these types of book on my life to help me (and US) trudge the road to happy destiny.

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Excellent

Whether or not you agree with Real's specific model, his work is provocative. Envisioning a plain on which men and women rest side by side as equals in the world may be unlikely, but making this a reality in our closest intimate relationships is a necessity. Secure attachment is the foundation of personal, familial, and generational health.

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repetitive message

this book keeps relayin the same, generic message and does not offer any helpful or practical, applicable suggestions.

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another great read

another one of those I did not want to stop listening till it was finished!

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