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  • It Didn't Start with You

  • How Inherited Family Trauma Shapes Who We Are and How to End the Cycle
  • Written by: Mark Wolynn
  • Narrated by: Mark Wolynn
  • Length: 8 hrs and 16 mins
  • 4.4 out of 5 stars (203 ratings)

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It Didn't Start with You

Written by: Mark Wolynn
Narrated by: Mark Wolynn
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Publisher's Summary

A groundbreaking approach to transforming traumatic legacies passed down in families over generations, by an acclaimed expert in the field.

Depression. Anxiety. Chronic Pain. Phobias. Obsessive thoughts. The evidence is compelling: the roots of these difficulties may not reside in our immediate life experiences or in chemical imbalances in our brains - but in the lives of our parents, grandparents, and even great-grandparents. The latest scientific research, now making headlines, supports what many have long intuited: that traumatic experience can be passed down through generations.

It Didn't Start with You builds on the work of leading experts in post-traumatic stress, including Mount Sinai School of Medicine neuroscientist Rachel Yehuda and psychiatrist Bessel van der Kolk, author of The Body Keeps the Score. Even if the person who suffered the original trauma has died or the story has been forgotten or silenced, memory and feelings can live on. These emotional legacies are often hidden, encoded in everything from gene expression to everyday language, and they play a far greater role in our emotional and physical health than has ever before been understood.

As a pioneer in the field of inherited family trauma, Mark Wolynn has worked with individuals and groups on a therapeutic level for over 20 years. It Didn't Start with You offers a pragmatic and prescriptive guide to his method, the Core Language Approach. Diagnostic self-inventories provide a way to uncover the fears and anxieties conveyed through everyday words, behaviors, and physical symptoms. Techniques for developing a genogram or extended family tree create a map of experiences going back through the generations. And visualization, active imagination, and direct dialogue create pathways to reconnection, integration, and reclaiming life and health. It Didn't Start With You is a transformative approach to resolving longstanding difficulties that, in many cases, traditional therapy, drugs, or other interventions have not had the capacity to touch.

PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.

©2016 Mark Wolynn (P)2016 Penguin Audio

What the critics say

"Mark Wolynn does a masterful job of illuminating the ways in which our ancestors' unresolved suffering, often unknown to us, disables us and binds us painfully to them. He gives us the tools and skills - an approach that combines understanding, imaginative dialogues, and compassionate reconnection - to free and heal ourselves." (James S. Gordon, MD, author of Unstuck: Your Guide to the Seven-Stage Journey out of Depression)
" It Didn't Start with You takes us a big step forward, advancing the fields of trauma therapy, mindfulness applications, and human understanding. It is a bold, creative, and compassionate work." (Sharon Salzberg, author of Lovingkindness and Real Happiness)
"This groundbreaking book offers a compelling understanding of inherited trauma and fresh, powerful tools for relieving its suffering. Mark Wolynn is a wise and trustworthy guide on the journey toward healing." (Tara Brach, PhD, author of Radical Acceptance and True Refuge)

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Let the healing in

This book is full of amazing tools and insights. Saving you a life less fulfilling than could be.

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Very deep and helpful

Listening to this book led to much deep reflection on patterns in my family and in my life . I embraced it fully and I have changed. I have made many notes and the process of my journey continues.

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Very interesting

I loved this book and learned so much from it. I think everyone needs to know this information presented in this book. Interesting and not boring and informative. I would definitely recommend.

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  • 2023-01-27

Great book!

Super insightful, a transformative look into how your yesterday can inform your today. A must read for those on a journey of healing.

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A must read

This book generates a lot of reflections, questions, and a lot of ah-ha moments. You will recognize people around you before recognizing yourself.... The old saying  “I see her mother/father in her/in him” takes all its sense once we reflect on inter-generational events.
This book is not meant to be an excuse, or to give permission to put blame on others, but an attempt to understand the root cause of our own behaviours so we can deal with it. Be prepared to work on yourself and take your time going through the material.
May you find an answer to your questions.

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Great book

I kept getting sleepy while listening, but it's dense with great information. I highly recommend!

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Thought provoking

Marks book so aligns with the principles in Internal Family Systems and the Legacy Burdens we are often unconscious of. Great listen!

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amazing book. it was so important for my healing.

well written and amazing. I was able to find my peace and end my anxiety. amazing. couldn't recommend it more ❤️

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light at the end of the ptsd tunnel

I just started this book not long ago but i already find it helping. the accompanying PDF and doing the visualizations is key. highly recommended if you have mysterious intense childhood trauma and resulting unhealthy/disconnected behaviours. that's what I am working through! Thank you Mark Wolynn for writing this fantastic book!

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Brilliant

Absolutely brilliant, Such a new and unique approach to trauma and healing. Highly recommend this book

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