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  • It's Not Okay

  • Turning Heartbreak into Happily Never After
  • Written by: Andi Dorfman
  • Narrated by: Andi Dorfman
  • Length: 9 hrs and 18 mins
  • 4.3 out of 5 stars (63 ratings)

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It's Not Okay

Written by: Andi Dorfman
Narrated by: Andi Dorfman
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Publisher's Summary

Andi Dorfman, the beloved finalist of season 18 of The Bachelor who infamously rejected Juan Pablo and went on to star on season 10 of The Bachelorette, dishes about what it's like to live out a love story - and its collapse - in front of the cameras, offering hard-won advice for moving on after a break-up, public or not.

Andi Dorfman, star of The Bachelor and The Bachelorette, talks candidly about what it's like to be courted by 25 handsome single men in this juicy insider's peek at dating - and breaking up - on national TV. She shares entertaining and heartfelt stories about her fellow Bachelor alums - many of who are still close friends - comes clean about calling out bachelor number 18, Juan Pablo, for bad behavior, and reflects on her personal challenges and uplifting experiences in love that she hopes will help you get through your own break-ups with grace and style!

©2016 Andi Dorfman (P)2016 Random House Audio

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What listeners say about It's Not Okay

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Loved this book!!!

Andi is such a fantastic narrator!!! Wow!
I didn’t want this book to end!!
I thoroughly enjoyed every second of it!
I highly recommend!
She is so honest and vulnerable and real!
I have listened to both her books and they both are Great!!
Thank you Andi!!

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  • Elise Stanislav
  • 2016-09-02

Don't waste your time

You're better than this Andi Dorfman. I'm not going to lie, I had high expectations for this book. I've been a fan of the Bachelor/Bachelorette series for quite some time, and I was always a fan of Andi's. However this book shed a lot of light on the person she really is. She came off very shallow, narcissistic, and overly dramatic. Full of cliche lines, designer clothing name drops, and predictable writing, this book has very little substance. 8 plus hours of her literally complaining about an ex, one who really doesn't need anymore attention than he already gets. Sorry Andi, I'm no longer a fan. Come back to reality; there are much bigger things in life than a guy you knew for less than a year.

19 people found this helpful

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  • Nicole
  • 2016-05-19

"The feminist in me"...

Would you recommend this book to a friend? Why or why not?

Look-- if you're a girl, able to afford expensive brand name clothes and accessories, enjoy self-deprecation with your girlfriends, and think that feminism means having a dirty mouth and disagreeing with a man.....then you might love this book! Or basically, if you enjoy everything about Legally Blonde because I feel like she and Elle Woods are interchangeable characters after listening to this.

However, if you're looking for the inside scoop on The Bachelor/ette or seeking any true insight of dealing with heartbreak, then I'd say this book's not for you. Drowning yourself in wine, defining your happiness by the size of your jeans, and criticizing men to feel better about yourself just isn't the way to go. I know she speaks to more things than that but you really have to have a similar personality to hers to enjoy it.

What was most disappointing about Andi Dorfman’s story?

Just how shallow it was. Andi herself said several times that "Am I shallow? Maybe." But really, the answer is absolutely. I feel slightly bad criticizing her especially because she put herself out there to be vulnerable and publicly exposed. However, it's just not a great a book.

I should have known better... but I wanted to give the Bachelorette Turned Writer category a chance since I actually enjoy the show quite a bit.

What do you think the narrator could have done better?

She did a fine job narrating... but I realized, as much as I enjoyed her on the show, she's just not someone I'd be drawn to in any other setting.

Was It's Not Okay worth the listening time?

Again, it depends-- are you generally shallow or not? For me no. For others with similar tastes, style, agendas as an Elle Wood type gal, it might be awesome for you.

15 people found this helpful

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  • Erin E Bilbrey
  • 2016-05-24

A good read if you want to listen to highschool mean girl prattle.

This book is not flattering to her. Interesting bits about "The Show" aside, she basically whines and complains. And constantly drops brand names and the websites she buys them from. Was she paid for this? I lost count on the number of times a designer name was mentioned in the first chapter. Over all just yucky.

13 people found this helpful

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  • Leahmgordon
  • 2016-05-21

Disappointed

As a long time 'Bachelor' fan I bought this audio book well in advance of the release date. To be clear, I am a childless, spouse-less female who is 10 years older than Andi, but I am also very educated and feel that I have accomplished a thing or two in my life. Sadly, Andi does not seem to know what she doesn't know, and instead of feeling empowered as a doctoral degree prepared single woman who has been jilted in my lifetime by an undeserving-of-me man, as a result of listening to Andi go on and on about the imperative need for a man, I now have a complex about not having found a perfect relationship to complete me. I also have grave concerns about Andi's alcohol consumption, which was one of the other ongoing themes of the text. I finished this scary missive very begrudgingly, only because I kept hoping for a dramatic finish that never came. skip this and read/ listen to Courtney Robertson's book about her 'Bachelor' experience if you want a juicy read that won't make you want to off yourself.

11 people found this helpful

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  • Is
  • 2016-08-13

Immature

This book is disappointing. You want to feel bad for her, but her immaturity and the vulgar language prevent you from doing so. The decisions she makes are so poor, you wonder about her sanity. In addition, she never takes responsibility for anything she does so it is hard to trust anything she says. This is a book about an interesting topic, but told in a vulgar and immature way.

10 people found this helpful

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  • Kayla
  • 2016-08-05

It's Not Okay, It's Terrible

Would you try another book from Andi Dorfman and/or Andi Dorfman?

Absolutely not. Five minutes into the book I realized that despite really liking her on the show, and enjoying her social media presence, that may have been creative editing and curation because her writing shows a completely different side to her that was really unflattering.

What could Andi Dorfman have done to make this a more enjoyable book for you?

Lose the name dropping of brands and constant complaining. During the first chapter she claimed that she wishes she got a pair of heels for every single man she had broken up with so that she could at least drown her sorrow in a great closet, then went on only a few minutes later to complain about having to wear heels every night on the show. I feel like every comment was just as shallow and contradictory as this and left me feeling depressed for her.

How could the performance have been better?

Her actual narration was technically fine, but the content of the book didn't help. Her voice slowly became really hard to continue to listen to and it was just very dry and bitter.

If you could play editor, what scene or scenes would you have cut from It's Not Okay?

I think I would have just tried a different approach other than the "bitter broken hearted girl drinking wine and talking about clothes" and would have added more of what fans of the show are really antsy to hear. Courtney Robertson's book is more of what I was expecting, but it is VERY different.

7 people found this helpful

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  • Pamela A Cairns Gwinnup
  • 2016-05-20

Snoooooooze

So boring!!! She never talks about the show, but instead about mindless details on her life, and nothing even interesting at that. At least I now know she hated gymnastics as a kid and wears a size 4 at Lululemon....don't read this!!!! Especially don't listen while driving. You will fall asleep.

7 people found this helpful

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  • Emily
  • 2016-06-07

Endless self-indulgent whining

Andi is my favorite bachelorette so I bought this as soon as I saw it. It was good to hear her voice again but I soon realized that this wasn't going to be the guilty pleasure I thought it would be. Written in a bogus self-help style, when she is the last person to take advice from, it offers very little in the way of bachelor /ette interest. The better book is I Didn't Come Here to Make Freiends by TV villainess Courtney Robertson. she turns out to be much more like able than the self deluded Dorfman. Who knew?

5 people found this helpful

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  • Cayla
  • 2016-12-05

I don't need her advice

This book wasn’t for you, but who do you think might enjoy it more?

Curious Bachelor/Bachelorette fans.

What about Andi Dorfman’s performance did you like?

Obviously it's her story so she did a good job performing

Any additional comments?

I don't think her advice is for the wise. I get it that her ex was really bad but I think she sinks to the same level/a level lower just in writing this book. That guy will never be able to live this down because there will always be a book out there about the awful things he did during this one season of his life. Also don't appreciate the coarse language. I listened out of curiosity because I love watching the bachelorette/bachelor & I just wondered what happened between Josh & Andy. But I'm not proud that I listened to this.

4 people found this helpful

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  • PAction
  • 2016-09-12

Complain, complain! Not worth it!

I began to read this because I am a fan of the Bachelor but after I read this I realized this show gave AndIe Dorfman a chance and after hearing her constant overuse of "F-u-c-k" (which she used constantly). I decided that her harsh personality was NOT my style. She is bold, accusing, slandering and frankly immature in her not so worldly views of what was an obvious Mia-matched pair. On my way! Reason I finished it in the end was to see if #26 actually did anything wrong... And no not anymore than she did herself. Name calling, and mind games. Both guilty!!!

I think it takes 2 to make or break a relationship work and she had an opportunity to tell her side of one story & #25 & #26 get to clean up her mess!

3 people found this helpful