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Noir

A Novel
Written by: Christopher Moore
Narrated by: Johnny Heller
Length: 9 hrs and 3 mins
Categories: Comedy, Satire
4.5 out of 5 stars (45 ratings)

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Publisher's Summary

The absurdly outrageous, sarcastically satiric, and always entertaining New York Times best-selling author Christopher Moore returns in finest madcap form with this zany noir set on the mean streets of post-World War II San Francisco, and featuring a diverse cast of characters, including a hapless bartender; his Chinese sidekick; a doll with sharp angles and dangerous curves; a tight-lipped air force general; a wisecracking waif; Petey, a black mamba; and many more.

San Francisco. Summer, 1947. A dame walks into a saloon....

It's not every afternoon that an enigmatic, comely blonde named Stilton (like the cheese) walks into the scruffy gin joint where Sammy "Two Toes" Tiffin tends bar. It's love at first sight, but before Sammy can make his move, an air force general named Remy arrives with some urgent business. 'Cause when you need something done, Sammy is the guy to go to; he's got the connections on the street.

Meanwhile, a suspicious flying object has been spotted up the Pacific coast in Washington State near Mount Rainer, followed by a mysterious plane crash in a distant patch of desert in New Mexico that goes by the name Roswell. But the real weirdness is happening on the streets of the City by the Bay.

When one of Sammy's schemes goes south and the Cheese mysteriously vanishes, Sammy is forced to contend with his own dark secrets - and more than a few strange goings-on - if he wants to find his girl.

Think Raymond Chandler meets Damon Runyon with more than a dash of Bugs Bunny and the Looney Tunes All Stars. It's all very, very Noir. It's all very, very Christopher Moore.

©2018 Christopher Moore (P)2018 HarperCollins Publishers

What the critics say

"Narrator Johnny Heller nails the wry tones and rhythmic pacing of the working mugs, corrupt cops, streetwise urchins, and tough dames who people Christopher Moore's novel, which the author calls 'perky noir.'" (AudioFile)

What members say

Average Customer Ratings

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Reviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.

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  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Great story, ok voice acting

I was afraid to get another Moore book after reading the first 100 pages of The Serpent of Venice, which, imho, was very childish and relied too much on the use of 'fornication stick' to poorly add comedic effect. This is far from the case in Noir. Superbly written, great characters and humour, faster pacing than some of his other novels to great effect. The voice actor does an amazing 'wise guy' and 'indignant rich snob ' but utterly fails in doing an oriental, black or female persona. Most female characters sounded like higher pitched wise guys. But dont let this deter you from getting the audiobook. Although I was slightly confused when he was switching characters in the beginning, by act 2 I was able to recognise each character because his acting, however inept to do females and oriental characters, was at least consistent. 5/7 I would listen again.

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

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    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

Moore fun😊

As always, Moore is entertaining as f@#$. 😊
Voice delivery was spot on. Only reason I knock off a star is because I've read Lamb and Fool, which are both even better. 😂

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    3 out of 5 stars
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average

ok book, with a fun setting and a good narration, but marred by a surprisingly predictable plot with a terribly coincidence filled resolution. Would not read again.

0 of 1 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Perfect timepiece novel with the narration to match

This novel is well written with lots of funny parts and innuendos. It is for a mature audience since there is swearing and derogatory language due to the year it takes place.
I would say it’s a great book for men as my husband really enjoyed listening to it on our long drive.
Listening to books like this really makes the time pass quickly.

0 of 1 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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Christopher Moore!

it's Christopher Moore! of course it's Golden! the story had lots of humour and wit (oh, the wit!) all wrapped up in a tight plot that is ever intriguing and interesting! I highly recommend!

0 of 1 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Chris this was stellar as usual

Very interesting as usual. Crazy things come out of no where. Had me grinning like a goof on the train to work

0 of 1 people found this review helpful

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  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
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    3 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
  • Maggie May
  • 2018-04-18

A Laugh Riot, Inconsistently Delivered

Christopher Moore is a favorite of mine and I really was looking forward to Noir.
Don't mistake me, I did enjoy it (there's a 'but' coming), but...

The book is written in two POVs. The Sammy POV chapters were delightful and everything you'd expect if you'd ever heard Johnny Heller narrate before.

The others?
I could a hear a vague impression of Bogart as the other POV, but it seemed half-hearted and inconsistent.
Throughout, the characters' voices sometimes waned and it became hard to tell who was talking.

There were one-liners and rejoinders that made me giggle and snort out loud so, overall, I'd recommend it. I did sometimes long for Fisher Stevens though.

25 of 28 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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  • Deborah
  • 2018-04-30

Perfection!

Hey, there, Mr. Moore. I hope you read your reviews because I’m tipping my hat to this startlingly original, bizarre, laugh out loud funny (as in both “ha, ha” and “what the hell did I just read”) novel. I’m already a fan, but even having had the delight of some of your earlier novels I wasn’t prepared for this experience. Wowza! Never slowed down, never got boring, loaded with lovable and original characters...what more do people want?! Geez. My advice: BUY this sucker, people!

18 of 20 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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  • Saturna
  • 2018-05-09

Literary Rasmatazz!

Sammy Two-toes , The Cheese, and gang had me laughing throughout my listen. LOVED the bonus history on the background of the area, people, and Noir literature.

5 of 5 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
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    3 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
  • MD
  • 2018-05-11

Glad I stuck with it

I almost...almost returned the book because I was hating the narrator’s style. I found myself going back and listening to a chapter twice because I had no clue of what had happened.

The main reason I stuck with it was because the reviews were high and I love Christopher Moore’s books. Finally, around 50% if the story I became comfortable with his narrative style and realized it had to be done that way to fit the story. I made peace with it.

I’m glad I did. The story is as crazy and funny as I wanted it to be. All lose ends were tied and I looked the characters in the story.

Moore doesn’t disappoint!

16 of 18 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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  • Ashley DeLaGarza
  • 2018-05-09

LOL

I love Christopher Moore’s writing. He manages to entwine comedy, emotional resonance, and whatever it is he has decided to research into a story that is smart, fun to read and even funnier to listen to. Do ya’ self a favor, kid, and pick up Noir!

4 of 4 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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  • Elang
  • 2018-05-04

Noir, a very enjoyable book

I loved the narration of this book, very well done, and it made me laugh out loud in places..I like that he kept the words from that era and used them. the story line was fun to. I will listen again, just so I can hear the narrator.

4 of 4 people found this review helpful

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    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars
  • Leonard
  • 2018-04-23

A good solid story

Would you listen to Noir again? Why?

Probably not. It's an OK story but it wasn't Moore's best work.

Which character – as performed by Johnny Heller – was your favorite?

The snake. The Cagny voice was interesting.

Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?

Not really. It just didn't pull me in like some of Moore's other work.

Any additional comments?

Worth the credit and the listen but Moore has much better work out there.

9 of 10 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
  • A. Carpenter
  • 2018-04-27

"Bite!Bite!Bite!"

Entertaining book, Entertaining narrator! I am a Christopher Moore fan, start to finish. This book takes you back to a much simpler time, a much simpler world. But things get a bit complicated for our new friend Sammy. You should not hesitate for one minute to join Sammy on this roller coaster ride. This is one of will definitely leave you wanting more of Moore!

7 of 8 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
  • michael
  • 2018-04-20

I love this book

I just finished listening to Noir. I am a Christopher Moore fan already and I knew I’d enjoy it. He really spun a great tale here that had me staying up way too late. It’s a wonderful story. Right up there with Sacre Bleu(just about my favorite book of all time).
The narrator was great. His voice and performance made me feel like I was there.
Thank you Christopher Moore! What’s next?

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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  • Brian
  • 2018-04-18

Amazing!

The narration is amazing, his description of post war San Francisco is engrossing and the story is vintage Moore.

6 of 7 people found this review helpful