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Sh-t My Dad Says

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Sh-t My Dad Says

Written by: Justin Halpern
Narrated by: Sean Schemmel
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About this listen

After being dumped by his longtime girlfriend, 28-year-old Justin Halpern found himself living at home with his 73-year-old dad. Sam Halpern, who is “like Socrates, but angrier, and with worse hair,” has never minced words, and when Justin moved back home, he began to record all the ridiculous things his dad said to him:

“That woman was sexy...Out of your league? Son, let women figure out why they won’t screw you. Don’t do it for them.”

“Do people your age know how to comb their hair? It looks like two squirrels crawled on their heads and started fucking.”

“The worst thing you can be is a liar...Okay, fine, yes, the worst thing you can be is a Nazi, but then number two is liar. Nazi one, liar two.”

More than a million people now follow Mr. Halpern’s philosophical musings on Twitter, and in this book, his son weaves a brilliantly funny, touching coming-of-age memoir around the best of his quotes.

An all-American story that unfolds on the Little League field, in Denny’s, during excruciating family road trips, and, most frequently, in the Halperns’ kitchen over bowls of Grape-Nuts, Sh-t My Dad Says is a chaotic, hilarious, true portrait of a father-son relationship from a major new comic voice.

©2010 Justin Halpern (P)2010 HarperCollins Publishers Fatherhood Parenting & Families Relationships Funny Witty Biography

What the critics say

“If you’re wondering if there is a real man behind the quotes on Twitter, the answer is a definite and laugh-out-loud yes.” (Christian Lander, New York Times best-selling author of Stuff White People Like)

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this was a fantastic book. worth every penny and more. highly recommed this book. you will enjoy it

this book had me laughing my head off. finished it in one sitting and thought about starting it over

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had me laughing and reflecting on things from my own life. would definitely suggest the book

great book

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This hole book is worth the listen. And then again and again. I wish he'd put more out. Things your own father would say. But it takes a story like this to bring those memories back. Thanks for letting me remeber my dad the way I did.

A must

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