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Publisher's Summary

After his father died on 9/11 in the World Trade Center, nine-year-old Matthew John Bocchi began an obsessive quest to find out exactly how he died. He researched video tapes, pictures, blogs, anything that could potentially answer the question looming in his mind: Was his father one of the jumpers? 

In the first memoir told by a child of 9/11, Matt intimately delves into the psychological and emotional torment that ensued after his father's death. With heartbreaking vulnerability, he details how his incessant quest resulted in a devastating act of violence that stripped his innocence as a young man. As Matt spirals down a bottomless pit of drug abuse, he willfully risks his life in search of the next high - all in an attempt to forget his past.

Now at 28 years old and sober, he recounts his unique story - one full of heartbreak and despair, grief and uncertainty, but most importantly, happiness and hope. The lesson he teaches us is clear but intricate: No matter how far you fall, you can always rise again. No matter how far you stray, you can always find your way home. And no matter how wide you sway, you can always pick up the pieces and stand tall.

©2020 Matthew John Bocchi (P)2020 HighBridge, a division of Recorded Books

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  • DBC3Mom
  • 2020-09-10

Unbelievable courage after destruction

What an amazing memoir from a brave young man! Thank you for your story and for sharing your innermost feelings and experiences; the crushing heartbreak of losing your father in the 9/11 attacks, sexual assault by a trusted relative and subsequent drug abuse. You are a survivor and I hope this book helps many
more young adolescents out there who are suffering through the hell you were able to escape. God be with you, thank you Matthew John Bocchi.

7 people found this helpful

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  • Mary mw
  • 2020-10-02

amazing

Hope carrying on..a true testimony that no one can take our hope away.. God bless all the casualties of 9/11. including family left behind. that children who lost a parent can can turn a tragedy into Hope for future generations

2 people found this helpful

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  • jennifer de sousa
  • 2020-09-12

A wonderfully put together book

Wow I absolutely loved this book listened from beginning to end all day great tribute to your dad he would have been so proud!!!!

2 people found this helpful

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  • Jaclyn DellaTorre
  • 2021-01-18

Amazing story

This is heartbreaking and captivating and a triumph story all in one. We all remember where we were on 9/11 hearing it from the perspective of a child of one of the victims is such a soul wrenching experience. Hearing Matt’s struggles and how he over comes them we’re amazing.

1 person found this helpful

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 2021-08-05

Incredible

This was an amazing book and story. Extremely well written and thought out. Would recommend to everyone.

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  • Shanonymous
  • 2021-03-08

Insightful, Honest, Emotional, Indispensable Book

This is SO not just a book about 9/11. It is incredibly much more than that. It is revelatory in its trigger stacking of inescapable events leading to such an internal case of PTSD (undiagnosed in book, just my perception).
The narration was spot-on; the narrator emoted ideally as if he was, indeed, Matt.

I see numerous people writing reviews stating they'd have "liked" the book better had it omitted the descriptive nature of the abuse suffered by Matt and..... **ONE SPOILER AHEAD*.... seriously, just one *SPOILER* in parenthesis - here it is; (poyentiallyhisbrothers). OKAY, OK, SPOILER OVER!! **

However, it was not only necessary, but intended to make the reader/listener uncomfortable - because it's REAL. If you can't handle reading about it, just imagine having lived through it! While it was difficult to stomach, it was even more imperative to reveal. It's not "designed" for the benefit of creating a more digestible "story;" it's Matt's actual experience. It begs to be exposed, and I suspect it may even help several listeners determine whether abuse they had suffered at the hands of family or other elder was/is, in fact, abuse. Or at least helped them consider their own unique situation, and ponder at what point they'd discover that releasing their pent-up ire or discomfort would help them overcome demons that they'd internalized - demons by which they didn't need to be burdened, in order to face their own difficulty lives - finally certain that they are not at fault for "lacking control."

Anyway, just my $0.02: Read this book.

It is not only bound to enable one to envision 9/11 from the perspective of a familial survivor, but also to free the listener of any pain onto which they may be grasping - pain which may be keeping them in a holding pattern of insanity (assuming insanity is defined as 'repeating the same behavior yet expecting different results").

A must-read.

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  • Granny
  • 2020-09-30

Not as good as expected

Too much detail in the sexual section. More than I needed to hear. But I learned a lot about how hard it is to recover from drug addiction.

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  • GA Classroom Gift Card
  • 2020-09-23

A Learning Experience

Wow. I actually learned from this very gritty, raw revelation of 9/11 families and their efforts to deal with the carnage thrust upon their family.

I learned there were body parts discovered in the rubble. This is both intriguing and deplorable since families were told what body parts had been recovered.

I learned what the life of an addict truly is like. He tells of the desperation to get high and how he goes about it with all the gory details.

I learned the devastation of child molestation. How it destroys a child’s innocence. He tells of how it destroyed his family as well, despite it all being true.

I learned what it’s like to rebound from a devastating life circumstance. He acknowledges he is always on a path to recovery but if he can recover anyone can.

Thank you for writing this book!

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  • Melissa Maloney
  • 2020-09-19

Powerful Memoir

An incredible journey of pain and suffering. It brought back so many memories of that awful day.. I can’t imagine the grief Matt and his family felt that day and continue to feel.
I DIDN’T WANT TO PUT THIS BOOK DOWN!

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  • Beth Baranoski
  • 2020-09-16

All I can say is wow!

I heard Matthew speak on a NY radio station and downloaded the book immediately. And I was not disappointed. It took me all of four days to finish. I cried through much of it and it gave me chills.