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The Mother of All Decisions

A Memoir of Mother Loss, Legacy, and Adopting Kids in Midlife

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What is legacy, and how will I leave one?

Betsy Armstrong asks herself this question after her forty-six-year-old mother dies with a list of regrets and her stepfather completely disinherits her. Alone, Betsy sets about building a life of no regrets: becoming a marathon runner and Ironman triathlete, quitting a cushy corporate job to lead a life of service, and overcoming a crippling fear of commitment to marry. Still, she’s always running from the grief she can’t escape. As Betsy’s forty-seventh birthday approaches, she finally confronts her losses and begins reflecting on the one thing she’d never considered: children.

Inspired by a friend’s adoption, Betsy and her husband, Doug, choose that path but face daunting obstacles—a failed adoption, a Russian courtroom drama, and a medical crisis in a tiny Russian town seven time zones away from Moscow. As the outcome of the adoption waxes and wanes, Betsy is forced to make the biggest decision of her life: How far will she go to become a mother?

©2025 Betsy Armstrong (P)2025 SheWrites Press
Développement personnel Perte et deuil Relations Éducation des enfants Russie Adoption
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