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  • The Origins of You

  • How Breaking Family Patterns Can Liberate the Way We Live and Love
  • Written by: Vienna Pharaon
  • Narrated by: Vienna Pharaon
  • Length: 8 hrs and 32 mins
  • 5.0 out of 5 stars (5 ratings)

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The Origins of You

Written by: Vienna Pharaon
Narrated by: Vienna Pharaon
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Publisher's Summary

From licensed therapist and popular Instagram relationship expert Vienna Pharaon (@mindfulmft, +631K followers) comes a profound guide to understanding and overcoming wounds from your Family of Origin—the foundation of how we relate to others, ourselves, and the world around us.

None of us had a perfect childhood; we are all carrying around behaviors that don’t serve us—and may in fact be hurting us. But it doesn’t have to be that way, says licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Vienna Pharaon. Our past might create our patterns, but we can change those patterns for the better...with the right tools.

In The Origins of You, Pharaon has unlocked a healing process to help us understand our Family of Origin—the family and framework we grew up within—and examine what worked (and didn’t) in that system. Certain dysfunctions (or “wounds”) in that Family of Origin will manifest in our adult behaviors in surprising ways, from work challenges to interpersonal struggles. But the good news: armed with the knowledge about our past, we can actually rewire our programming to meaningfully improve our relationships and our lives in the future.

It doesn’t matter whether you’ve been in therapy for decades, or whether therapy isn’t for you. It doesn’t matter if you have loads of memories from childhood, or struggle to remember anything at all. All that matters is your willingness to look inside yourself, and your determination to find a new way forward. Complete with guided introspection, personal experiences, client stories, frameworks for having difficult conversations, and worksheets to complement each chapter, The Origins of You will teach you how your family can both build you up and break you down...and how you can heal yourself for good.

©2023 Vienna Pharaon (P)2023 Penguin Audio

What the critics say

The Origins of You does a brilliant job of striking the balance of acknowledging the pain of the past without getting lost in blame. As you reflect on growing up in your family, you’ll have countless aha moments, opportunity for self-discovery, and a path forward for ending unhealthy patterns in your life and relationships. This book is the book that everyone in your family should read.”Julianne Hough, Emmy Award Winner, Dancer, Actor and Entrepreneur 

"The Origins of You is a powerful guide to know ourselves and change our relationships. Vienna has provided the knowledge we need to deeply improve our lives. This book is for anyone who is serious about personal growth and is ready for a big change."–Yung Pueblo, author of Clarity and Connection

"I can say the following with great confidence: Vienna Pharaon has outdone herself. And, as someone who has known her excellence and passion for years, this is saying a lot! In The Origins of You, Vienna guides us, with her kind heart and clear eyes, to make connections between our past and our present. Because insight is necessary but not sufficient, Vienna goes further, helping us heal our wounds and create new possibilities for cultivating self-love and healthy relationships in our lives today. The Origins of You is a book that I will recommend without hesitation to my clients, students, family, and friends."–Alexandra H. Solomon, PhD, licensed clinical psychologist at The Family Institute at Northwestern University, faculty at Northwestern University, author of Loving Bravely and Taking Sexy Back, host of Reimagining Love

What listeners say about The Origins of You

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Life Changjng!

I recommend this for every human on this planet! The way Vienna walks through each wound with such clarity allows you to quickly identify what resonates with you... then you can start to do the necessary work.
So absolutely, beautifully written!

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  • Jas
  • 2023-03-01

Enlightening !!

Could not stop soaking it all... was obsessed with this book. Very easy to understand. So many l great lessons and discoveries. A MUST read for understanding of yourself!!

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10/10!

Beautifully eye opening and a clear perspective on why we are the way we are and why we act the way we do. So thankful I gave the time to listen. Not to mention Vienna’s self narration of her book is the sweet cherry on top.

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 2023-03-24

Like a mirror

Beautifully written and spoken. I saw myself and am going to have to sit with this book awhile. Thank you for your heart to heal.

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  • HNB4513
  • 2023-03-10

One of the best books I’ve ever read in this genre

As a self help junkie, I’ve read many many books and this one is different in a good way. She takes a complicated issue of what makes us who we are and why we do/feel/think the way we do and helps you pinpoint EXACTLY what the “wound” is. It’s the first time I’ve read something and had a realization and everything clicked. Now that I realize what my wound is I can concentrate on healing it. I’m assuming you can have some or all of them but there is one that will really stand out to you.
Thank you, for sharing your work with the world!

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  • Dr. Sherri
  • 2023-03-05

Highly Recommended

I love this book, I also shed many tears along the way. If you are looking for what holds you back, trips you up, sabotages you, keeps you in never ending arguments with partners and circling in old patterns in any relationship, pick up this book. Vienna is brilliant, compassionate and deeply insightful as she expertly walks you through your journey while creating a safe space for you to explore some old deep wounding patterns. Sharing her own journey and stories as examples brings this book to life. I believe this book is most important for all to pick up now that will surely help to create a better world.
Dr. G

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  • Joshua Pratt
  • 2023-02-26

Best self development book so far

Not only does the author give you great insight into what we react the way we do, she does it in a way that is easy to digest.

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  • Natalie Santana
  • 2023-02-26

Everyone needs to read this book

Whether you’re in a relationship or working on your own personal growth, this book is for you. Wow, and like Vienna says, ooofff. Soul work is hard work, and this book helped give language to parts of me I didn’t realize were still wounded. The narration was superb, I felt like I was in the room with her. Thank you for writing this book.

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  • Jackie O
  • 2023-02-25

This book is amazing, love it!

This book gets right to the heart of so many things that affect relationships throughout life. It provides insight into what is and also offers steps to improve. Childhood traumas May not go away but we can keep them from affecting our interactions with others for the rest of our life. Great job Vienna.

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  • Anonymous User
  • 2023-02-24

So good, I’m listening again

This book came at a time when I needed it most, and Vienna’s work deeply resonated with me. Thank you, Vienna, for helping us to identify and heal wounds so that we can experience healthy relationships.

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  • NH3246
  • 2023-02-24

An instant staple

As a licensed couple and family therapist, myself; and as the second reviewer of this audiobook; let me be among the first to declare this book an instant a staple in our field. Vienna’s way of synthesizing attachment, family systems, inner child work, and more is so clear and accessible, that I’ll be recommending this book to literally everyone. On top of it, I could hear Vienna’s warmth, kindness, and empathy throughout the reading. Congrats to you, the listener, for choosing a real masterpiece.

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 2023-02-24

Wonderful

Just started today and definitely feels like I have gone deeper than months of therapy.