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Wired for Love

How Understanding Your Partner's Brain and Attachment Style Can Help You Defuse Conflict and Build a Secure Relationship
Written by: Stan Tatkin PsyD MFT
Narrated by: Michael Hinton
Length: 7 hrs and 37 mins
4.5 out of 5 stars (25 ratings)

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Publisher's Summary

"What the heck is my partner thinking?" is a common refrain in romantic relationships and with good reason. Every person is wired for love differently, with different habits, needs, and reactions to conflict. The good news is that most people's minds work in predictable ways and respond well to security, attachment, and rituals, making it possible to actually neurologically prime the brain for greater love and fewer conflicts.

Wired for Love is an innovative guide to understanding your partner's brain and enjoying a romantic relationship built on love and trust. Synthesizing research findings drawn from neuroscience, attachment theory, and emotion regulation, this audiobook presents 10 guiding principles that can improve any relationship.

©2011 Stan Tatkin (P)2015 Tantor

What the critics say

"A marvelous resource." (Rick Hanson, PhD, author of Buddha's Brain)

What members say

Average Customer Ratings

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One of the better relationship audio books

Really enjoyed this audio book. Yes, sometimes the little skits/examples were cheesy, but they accurate to real relationships and really helped! I wish there was more in depth talk about attachment styles (i.e., islands, waves or anchors). Great source of information. My partner is a therapist and listened with me once and commented that this book offered great insight.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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mind-blowing!

I thought my problems were unique! Turns out they're not, and I am soso grateful for these profoundly helpful insights!

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Accessible and Helpful

As someone looking to be a couples therapist, this was helpful information and accessibly written

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interesting approach - but dripping with cheese

I do like the concept. But I swear - if I hear the words 'couple bubble' one more time I might well throw up. So much cheese in the stories.

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Struggling with a relationship good tips here

Could have used my last relationship but now have more tools going forward. A favourite was the science backing info shared about how we are naturally wired and challenges this brings to a relationship.

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I wish that I read this when I was younger...

This book started off a bit slow, amybe t was because it was my first audiobook? It took a bit of time but I really got in to it and learned a lot! I will be listening to this again for sure!

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unbearably monotone narrator

The subject matter is a bit dry to begin with, but the narrator is unbearable. I'm pretty sure sawing my arm off with a spoon would be easier than engaging and staying awake through more than a chapter at a time.

0 of 1 people found this review helpful

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  • JESSICA
  • 2016-07-09

Excellent book and based on science

What did you love best about Wired for Love?

Loved this book, plan to listen to it again. I love how the author incorporates major attachment theorists as well as recent research on interpersonal neurobiology. Is written in a way that people not in the psychology field can understand the concepts. The book also has a really great narrator. Have recommended the book to patients.

9 of 9 people found this review helpful

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  • Maker
  • 2018-04-08

No PDF = 1 star

Any audio book that has exercises but the production team cannot be bothered to create and add a PDF of those exercises for listeners, is to me, and in my opinion should be to you, a one star showing. In fact you’ve already written it and printed it. Greedy and not showing up for the people.who paid you for your work. That aside this would have been a 4 or 5 star review.

26 of 28 people found this review helpful

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  • Seth Patterson
  • 2016-08-30

This book saved my relationship

If you always thought that the 'men are from Mars and women are from Venus" books were hokie and based on a lot of subjective opinions then this is the book for you! based on a lot of research and science of the brain the author very clearly and in layman's terms lays out how the brain is literally wired for love and why we do the things we do in relationships.

6 of 6 people found this review helpful

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  • JONI FUNK
  • 2015-11-28

Review: Wired for Love

Finally, a book on making relationships work that is based on science and not standard marriage counseling BS.

5 of 5 people found this review helpful

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  • Jeffrey Potts
  • 2016-04-10

Game changer

If you really want lasting, positive results, listen and follow the instructions herein. I've listened to this book more times than any other. It's a great companion and ally for my ambassadors.

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

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  • clothing addict
  • 2016-01-05

well worth the time

this book cut through the fluff and provided direct advice on how to approach and how to improve relationships.
the suggestions were logical and can be used on both romantic and non romantic relationships.

3 of 3 people found this review helpful

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 2016-08-07

Excellent Book for Successful Relationship!

Loved it! Great book to read as a couple if you want to have a successful relationship. simply said, we don't come with instruction manuals. Very important to understand how each person is designed and how our brains are wired... and why we are the way we are. I now have a deeper appreciation of my mate, a wave, as well as better understanding of myself, the island. Just wish it gave better direction for exact ways to overcome some of the underlying battles an island faces.

5 of 6 people found this review helpful

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  • EL BUILDER
  • 2016-03-21

great perspective

This is a great book with a fresh and enlightening perspective on relationship issues and remedies.

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

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  • Franc-Eric
  • 2018-09-06

Good narration horrible scientific term pronunciation

Sits a gold boom that has a lot of useful info. However, the narrator (and the recording crew) had no clue how to pronounce scientific terms. It was SO BAD as to completely distract from the points being made/info being conveyed.
Re-record those sections where brain science is discussed.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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  • Carrie S. Rohde
  • 2017-07-25

Saved my relationship

I cannot recommend this book enough. As a recently divorced person still trying to determine what went wrong and facing similar struggles in a new relationship, this helped guide me to a place of new hope and more fulfilling relationship.

It is practical, easy to understand, and easy to implement.

Thank you!

1 of 1 people found this review helpful