Have you ever been accused of being a problem simply because you brought up a problem? In healthy relationships, it is essential that couples feel safe and are on the same page. It is normal to want your relationship to grow, and to wonder where the line is when it comes to bringing things to your partner's attention that you would like to change. However, there are red flags you need to be aware of particularly if you struggle with fawning, people pleasing, insecure attachment and tend to be the codependent partner in relationships.

In this episode, Lisa A. Romano Codependency Expert and Breakthrough Life Coach, helps us get clear about some communication guidelines that can help us make clear, logical, and fair decsions about our relationships.

• Does your partner accuse you of being the only problem simply because you want to talk about a problem?
• Are they passive-aggressive, and do they punish you for bringing up an issue you'd like to work out?
• Do they deny a problem exists at all, making it impossible for you to experience any movement forward in your relationship or resolution?
• Are you being gaslit, devalued, or ignored for talking about a real issue?

Consider these red flags, and also ask yourself:

• Does my partner have the willingness to listen?
• Are they capable of real change?
• Do they want to work on the relationship?

Before walking away or making any major life decisions, getting clear about your partner's behaviors, intentions, and level of willingness to discuss, change, or work on marital issues, allows you to act on your own behalf with confidence rather than codependently.

Ready to Conquer the Inner Child Wounds that Keep You Repeating Codependency?

Click below to learn more about The 12 Week Breakthrough Coaching Program—a trauma-informed, neuroscience-based coaching program created specifically for adult children of narcissistic, neglectful, or emotionally immature caregivers, who are ready to ascend the chains of the past.

Inside the program, you'll be guided through:

• Brain retraining techniques rooted in neuroscience
• Inner child healing and self-concept reorganization
• Neuroscience Backed Journaling prompts and assessments to increase self-awareness
• Tools to stop subconscious self-abandonment and start living from your true self
• Embrace shadow work from a higher state of consciousness to experience integration

This method has helped thousands heal from complex trauma and break toxic generational patterns, with tools to rewire limiting beliefs and build authentic self-worth.

👉 Learn more: here

#CodependencyRecovery #InnerChildHealing #NarcissisticParent #EmotionalNeglect #TraumaInformedHealing #ComplexTrauma #SelfAbandonment #NeuroscienceBasedHealing

Adult children of alcoholics, and those raised in narcissistic, toxic, neglectful and unpredictable homes, who decide to dive into self growth, self help and emotional healing, inevitably learn that they cannot unsee what they see now that they have awakened to the truth of their toxic family dynamics. This can be a distressing time for someone who has identified themselves as a caretaker, rescuer, people pleaser and who has felt responsible for maintaining family relationships, at all costs, and even at the expense of their mental, emotional, physical and spiritual health.

It is bittersweet to awaken to the truth of a toxic family system, and to be confronted by the fact that just because you can see the truth, it does not imply the people you love, who you have been enmeshed with and you have tried to save, fix or rescue, will want to see what you see.

In this episode, Lisa A. Romano, opens up about the emotional challenges of a healing adult child who struggles with abandonment trauma, codependency, and the fear of disconnection, who fawns to keep toxic family dynamics and unhealthy friendships afloat when they discover that they must let go of those they love.

In this episode, you will learn:

✨How to get more comfortable with accepting the uncomfortable reality of having to let someone you love go.

✨How codependency pushes God's love out and idolizes fear instead.

✨What you need to know about making a spiritually aligned decision when needing to end a toxic relationship with a loved one, family or friend.

✨Easy to recall Biblical Scriptures that reinforce the need for healthy boundaries when any relationship fills your heart with fear vs God's love.

Lisa's 12 Week Breakthrough Program is a neuroscience-based roadmap to help you gently rewire subconscious patterns, regulate your nervous system, and return home to your authentic self.

👉 Begin your journey: https://www.lisaaromano.com/12-wbcp

#HealingJourney #SpiritualAwakening #InnerConnection #TraumaRecovery #NeuroscienceHealing #SelfDiscovery #YouAreEnough #LisaARomanoPodcast #PurposeWithin #toxicfamily #adultchildrenofalcoholics #lettinggo #innerchildhealing #toxicfamilysystems #codependencyrecovery #lisaaromano #mentalhealthpodcast #healingjourney #selfhelppodcast

Codependency is an umbrella term used to describe a broad spectrum of emotional, mental and behavioral, subconscious, and automatic trauma responses developed in early childhood as an adaptation to chronic, inescapable stress. While over-functioning as a small child, to avoid rejection, the child's nervous system learns to scan their environment for potential threats. This scanning is called hypervigilance, and it also exiles the inner child into an abyss.

Children of toxic, dysfunctional parents, families, and circumstances are denied the compassionate adult, whose role is to mentor, teach, and guide a child in a way that nurtures a positive sense of self. The very basics of healthy human interraction are not modeled.

A child who has learned they must scan their environment must:

• Use their conscious waking hours scanning their parents' facial expressions, moods, and tones--while this is occurring, a child is learning how to morph and adapt, rather than explore the inner self, their inner child, their inner landscape
• Abandoning the self, including their innate needs, wants, emotions, and right to be authentic, to avoid further emotional neglect, abuse, bullying, or rejection—while this survival response was useful during childhood, the adult child eventually learns that they often don't know what they want or need. This can be a frustrating experience in therapy and relationships.

If you are codependent, you may have felt frustrated in therapy when asked, "What do you need" What do you want?" Codependents do not know what they need.

Codependency is built on self-abandonment.

Many codependents grew up in environments where their emotions were dismissed, mocked, punished, or ignored. Carl Jung would say their inner child—what he called the "Divine Child"—was exiled.

So when asked:

• "What do you feel?"

• "What do you want?"

• "What do you need?"

…they genuinely do not know.

This creates enormous frustration in therapy, because the inner world feels foreign, inaccessible, or even dangerous. The codependent has learned to trust external authority over inner intuition.

Reconnecting with the inner self requires time, patience, and the slow dismantling of shame.

Therapy asks them to return to a Self they have never been allowed to meet.

The journey back home must be slow, steady, and compassionate; otherwise, therapy can sometimes cause more harm than good and lead to a codependent person trying to please the therapist, thereby reenacting a facet of their adaptation survival response.

Begin Your Healing Journey:

Lisa introduces her signature 12 Week Breakthrough Method—a trauma-informed, neuroscience-based coaching program created specifically for adult children of narcissistic, neglectful, or emotionally immature caregivers.

Inside the program, you'll be guided through:

• Brain retraining techniques rooted in neuroscience
• Inner child healing and self-concept reorganization
• Neuroscience Backed Journaling prompts and assessments to increase self-awareness
• Tools to stop subconscious self-abandonment and start living from your true self
• Embrace shadow work from a higher state of consciousness to experience integration

This method has helped thousands heal from complex trauma and break toxic generational patterns, with tools to rewire limiting beliefs and build authentic self-worth.

👉 Learn more: here

#CodependencyRecovery #InnerChildHealing #NarcissisticParent #EmotionalNeglect #TraumaInformedHealing #ComplexTrauma #SelfAbandonment #NeuroscienceBasedHealing