In today’s Q&A episode, I am answering two powerful parenting questions about teens who are anxious, withdrawn, or pushing parents away.

Exploring how to support a 14-year-old who feels intense anxiety entering stores or public places, and why this “spotlight stage” is such a normal part of teen development. Listen in to hear me share how tools like the CALM Technique, predictability, rehearsal, and sensory anchors can reduce anticipatory fear and help anxious teens feel more regulated.

We then look at how to communicate with a 15-year-old who shuts down or becomes easily irritated, and why teens often push away the feeling of being small rather than the parent themselves. I offer practical strategies like side-door conversations, low-pressure moments of connection, a warm neutral tone, and the 5:2 ratio to keep communication open and relationship-focused.

This episode is a reassuring guide for any parent navigating anxious teens, withdrawn teens, or the normal developmental challenges of adolescence reminding you that connection and co-regulation are the bridge back to closeness.

Jennifer's Takeaways:

• Q&A on Helping a 14-Year-Old with Anxiety (00:01)
• Strategies for Managing Anxiety in Public Places (04:46)
• Connecting with Teenagers: Side Door Conversations (09:05)
• Building Connection Through Proximity and Moments (15:13)
• Resources and Final Thoughts (18:12)

Meet Jennifer Kolari

Jennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.

Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.

Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.

Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.

One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

Phones and AI aren’t going anywhere, so the goal isn’t to ban them, but to help our kids integrate them wisely. In this episode, we’ll explore how constant connectivity impacts a child’s ability to focus, plan, regulate emotions, and problem-solve. We’ll look at why kids and teens are especially vulnerable to the “instant relief” loop that phones provide, and how AI can both support and hinder their growing brains.

Most importantly, we’ll talk about what parents can do: how to set boundaries that actually stick, how to preserve core executive functioning skills, and how to help your child build the resilience they’ll need in a world where technology is always within reach.

Jennifer's Takeaways:

• Impact of Cell Phones and AI on Kids' Focus and Problem-Solving Skills (00:00)
• Challenges of Multitasking with Multiple Screens (02:46)
• Balancing AI Use with Critical Thinking Skills (03:50)
• The Role of Boredom in Developing Creativity (05:47)
• Teaching Kids to Use AI as a Coach, Not a Crutch (07:05)
• The Future of AI in Education and Parenting (08:09)

Meet Jennifer Kolari

Jennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.

Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.

Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.

Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.

One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

One of the hardest moments for parents is when the child who used to tell you everything, who they sat with at lunch, who their friends were, what made them laugh suddenly starts saying less. The silence can feel alarming. Many parents immediately wonder: Are they hiding something? Did I do something wrong? Are they okay?

But what if the quiet isn’t rejection? What if it’s part of growing up and becoming themselves?

In this episode, we explore the difference between privacy and secrecy, how to recognize each, and why understanding this distinction can completely transform your relationship with your tween or teen. You’ll learn how to stay connected without crowding them, support their independence without losing emotional closeness, and navigate the shift from childlike openness to adolescent boundaries with more confidence and less fear.

Jennifer's Takeaways:

• Understanding the Difference Between Privacy and Secrecy (00:00)
• The Role of Privacy in Teen Development (02:51)
• Balancing Parental Reactions and Teen Privacy (03:15)
• Handling Secrets and Alignment in Teens (05:28)
• Practical Tips for Parents on Managing Privacy (07:22)
• The Importance of Connection in Parenting (09:33)

Meet Jennifer Kolari

Jennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.

Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.

Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.

Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.

One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

When your child’s emotions, reactions, and struggles all feel bigger than you can handle, it can be exhausting. But there’s one thing that truly changes everything: connection.

In this episode, we’ll explore how deep, genuine connection helps regulate a child’s nervous system, reduces explosive moments, and strengthens emotional safety. Because when kids feel seen, understood, and safe, even their most intense storms begin to settle.

Jennifer's Takeaways:

• Understanding ADHD and Its Impact on Parenting (00:00)
• The Role of Skills vs. Medication in ADHD Management (02:44)
• Applying the Calm Technique for ADHD Kids (04:39)
• Handling Doom Piles and Overwhelm (07:49)
• Reframing ADHD Strengths and Balancing Empathy with Limits (14:27)
• The Importance of Connection and Regulation in Parenting (16:48)
• Medication and Its Role in ADHD Management (19:12)
• Conclusion and Resources for Parents (22:32)

Meet Jennifer Kolari

Jennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.

Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.

Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.

Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.

One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

Even the closest families move through seasons of connection.

There are times when everyone feels in sync, laughing easily, sharing space, and understanding each other without words. And then there are moments when it feels like you’re speaking different languages, missing each other’s cues, or simply running on separate frequencies.

In this episode, we’ll explore why those quieter or more distant seasons happen and how to keep your family’s love steady through them. You’ll learn what causes those natural fluctuations in closeness, how to recognize when it’s just a temporary rhythm versus something deeper, and practical ways to reconnect with calm and compassion.

Because real closeness isn’t about being perfectly attuned all the time, it’s about staying anchored in love, even when connection feels thin.

Jennifer's Takeaways:

• Family Closeness and Relationship Dynamics (00:00)
• Understanding and Managing Emotional Reactions (03:31)
• Self-Reflection and Identifying Personal Triggers (07:27)
• The Power of Interpretation and Control in Relationships (08:28)

Meet Jennifer Kolari

Jennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.

Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.

Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.

Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.

One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

Boredom, it’s uncomfortable, it’s annoying, and it often sends us scrambling for solutions. But what if boredom isn’t something to fix… what if it’s actually something to embrace?

In this episode, we’ll explore why boredom isn’t the enemy. In fact, it’s one of the most valuable emotional states for children. Boredom helps develop creativity, problem-solving, and emotional resilience, all essential skills for healthy development.

In this week's episode you’ll learn how to shift your perspective, handle your own discomfort when your child complains, and create the space for boredom to do what it’s meant to: spark imagination and inner resourcefulness.

Jennifer's Takeaways:

• Understanding the Importance of Boredom (00:00)
• The Role of Boredom in Child Development (02:03)
• Imagination and Boredom in Adolescents (04:05)
• Handling Boredom in Children (07:18)
• Strategies for Managing Boredom (08:38)
• Practical Tips for Parents (11:59)

Meet Jennifer Kolari

Jennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.

Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.

Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.

Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.

One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

Every family has its own rhythm. Some love cooking together, some bond over board games and some, believe it or not, enjoy arguing for fun. To them, debating ideas and challenging each other isn’t conflict; it’s connection.

But what feels like playful banter to one person can feel like chaos, criticism, or even emotional danger to another. So how do you know when spirited debate crosses the line? And how do you create a home where everyone feels heard and safe, whether they love to spar or prefer peace and quiet?

In this episode, we’ll explore why some families naturally fall into patterns of “recreational arguing,” what emotional needs this dynamic can meet, and how to find the right balance between healthy expression and emotional safety.

Jennifer's Takeaways:

• Recreational Arguing in Families (00:00)
• Neuroscience Behind Recreational Arguing (01:43)
• Balancing Fun Debates with Emotional Safety (03:39)
• Teaching Kids Awareness and Respect (06:00)
• Managing Intense Family Interactions (07:38)

Meet Jennifer Kolari

Jennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.

Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.

Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.

Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.

One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).

Have you ever looked down at your phone to find a flood of messages, ten, twenty, even thirty texts from your child all in a row? Sometimes it’s about something small, like wanting a snack or permission for a new game. Other times, it’s a full emotional storm, with your child texting in distress, upset, or desperate for reassurance.

It can feel overwhelming. You’re torn between exhaustion and worry; afraid to miss an important message, but frustrated by the constant notifications.

In this episode, we’ll unpack why kids do this, what emotional and neurological factors might be driving the behavior, and how to respond with calm, clarity, and love. You’ll learn practical ways to set healthy boundaries while helping your child build emotional regulation and resilience.

Jennifer's Takeaways:

• Understanding the Problem of Constant Texting from Kids (00:00)
• Factors Contributing to Kids' Urgent Texting (01:28)
• Behavioral and Neurological Aspects of Urgent Texting (03:36)
• Parental Reactions and Emotional Triggers (06:03)
• Strategies for Managing Kids' Urgent Texting (07:17)
• Practical Tips for Teaching Kids to Wait (09:42)
• Reflecting on Personal Triggers and Modeling Calm (13:37)

Meet Jennifer Kolari

Jennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in the US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.

Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.

Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.

Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.

One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).