Why do the same moments bring one person joy and another person pain? And how can we stop letting those differences destroy our relationships?

In this powerful episode, Glenn, Phyllis, and Tera unpack a transformative truth: we all enter the same situations with completely different backstories, and those differences create conflict faster than anything else—especially during the holidays.

Tera shares a vulnerable story about feeling hurt by Glenn's teasing, only to discover they have polar opposite beliefs about what jokes mean. Glenn grew up believing you only joke about things that aren't true, while Tera learned that every joke contains truth. Same behavior. Completely different experiences.

Glenn and Phyllis walk through real-life examples—from music preferences to days off—showing how our childhood experiences shape what brings us joy or pain today. They share practical tools for conveying your experience without attacking your partner, and how to create curiosity instead of conflict.

In this episode, you'll discover:

• Why the holidays amplify relational disconnection (and how to navigate family gatherings without losing yourself)
• The simple phrase that stops emotional flooding before it creates an "emotional dam"
• How one couple discovered why the husband's day off was his most dysregulated day of the week
• Why saying "I felt hurt" is completely different than "that hurt me"
• The secret to making space for both people's experiences without anyone being "wrong"
• How to recognize when you're losing your identity and what to do about it

Featured Story: A client discovers his day off triggers fear because he doesn't know his worth outside of work—and the powerful moment when he finds himself through the Core Emotion Wheel.

This episode will transform how you approach conflict, whether it's with your spouse, your kids, your coworkers, or your extended family. Because the goal isn't to change what you like or agree on everything—it's to see each other.

Resources mentioned:

• Get the Core Emotion Wheel: www.connectioncodes.co/podcast
• Book a Connection Codes Coach: https://connectioncodes.co/coaches

Programs referenced:

• Clarity Reset (for identity work and emotion processing): https://www.connectioncodes.co/clarity-reset
• Foundations Masterclass: https://www.connectioncodes.co/foundations
• Late Night Program: https://www.connectioncodes.co/late-night

What if the real problem isn't being alone, but feeling alone when someone's standing right in front of you?

In this powerful conversation, we're diving deep into one of the most misunderstood emotions: loneliness. Dr. Glenn and Phyllis just returned from an incredible journey through Europe, and they're sharing fresh insights about what loneliness actually is, why it's so damaging to our health, and most importantly—what actually helps.

Here's what might surprise you: the solution to loneliness isn't being around more people. In fact, you can feel most lonely in a crowded room, at a family dinner, or even lying next to your spouse.

This episode will help you understand why relational absence is far more painful than geographical absence, and how the "still face" we give each other—even unintentionally—creates chronic pain that affects our marriages, parenting, and overall wellbeing.

You'll hear a jaw-dropping story about a dad who went home from a Connection Codes event and used one simple tool (the "ooh") to transform his child's middle-of-the-night meltdowns from 45 minutes of chaos to 2 minutes of connection. This is the power of being emotionally present instead of just physically present.

Key Topics:

- Why loneliness is more damaging to your health than smoking a pack of cigarettes a day

- The difference between geographical absence and relational absence

- How the "still face experiment" reveals what we're all experiencing in our relationships

- Why going to a hotel alone can feel better than being home with your family

- The chronic loneliness of modern parenting and partnership

- How to identify loneliness when it's hiding beneath anger and frustration

- What your brain actually needs when loneliness fires (hint: it's not a crowd)

- Practical tools to move from isolation to genuine connection

This episode is for you if:

- You feel exhausted doing everything by yourself even though people are around

- You'd rather be alone than feel alone with your family

- You're experiencing chronic irritation and don't know why

- You want to stop the cycle of loneliness in your home

- You're ready to understand what your emotions are actually telling you

The Connection Codes aren't just theory—they're tools that work immediately when you implement them. Whether you're a parent trying to connect with your kids, a spouse feeling disconnected, or someone navigating the holiday season with a deep sense of isolation, this episode will give you clarity and actionable steps forward.

Resources Mentioned:

- The Still Face Experiment- Connection Codes events in Europe

- Cincinnati event testimonials

- Upcoming 2026 events

Ready to go deeper?

Get the Core Emotion Wheel - The foundational tool for processing emotions and creating connection www.connectioncodes.co/podcast

Book a Connection Codes Certified Coach - Work one-on-one with someone trained in these tools https://connectioncodes.co/coaches

Want to bring Connection Codes to your church, business, or organization? Email us! We're booking events for 2026 and would love to come to your community.

Keywords: loneliness, emotional health, mental health, marriage communication, parenting tools, emotional regulation, connection, isolation, relationship advice, family therapy, chronic loneliness, emotional intelligence, still face experiment, authentic vulnerability, emotional presence, marriage help, parenting struggles, mental wellness, emotional awareness, relational connection

Episode Description:What if one vulnerable conversation could completely transform your marriage? Dan Purcell, marriage intimacy coach and creator of the Intimately Us app, shares the pivotal moment when a friend's honesty about his sex life turned Dan's world upside down—and ultimately changed the trajectory of his marriage and career.In this raw and honest conversation, Dan opens up about growing up in a conservative environment where sex was taboo, the anxiety that carried into his marriage, and the courage it took to have a five-hour vulnerable conversation with his wife at 9 PM that didn't end until 2 AM. What emerged wasn't just better sex—it was better communication, better parenting, and a completely different level of connection.Glenn and Phyllis explore with Dan the common barriers that keep couples from experiencing rich intimacy, the danger of viewing yourself as superior to your spouse, and why solving sexual problems requires "second-order change"—not just redecorating the kitchen, but remodeling it entirely.

Key Topics:- Mental health and emotional vulnerability in marriage- Breaking through sexual shame and conservative upbringings- The courage required for authentic conversations about intimacy- Desire discrepancy and what really causes it- How superiority thinking destroys sexual connection- Moving from transactional to transformational intimacy- The power of one vulnerable conversation to change everything- Creating play and creativity in your sex life- Leadership development through emotional honesty

What You'll Learn:- Why most couples miss on authentic connection (even when they think they're doing fine)- How to have the scary conversation that could transform your marriage- The real reason behind sexual desire discrepancy (hint: it's not about being too busy)- Why solution-oriented approaches often backfire in intimacy- How to move from wearing masks to true vulnerability with your spouse- Practical tools and games to bring playfulness back to foreplay

About Our Guest: Dan Purcell is a marriage intimacy coach who helps couples create deeper sexual and emotional connection. After a career-changing conversation eight years ago, he developed the Intimately Us app and now coaches couples full-time, helping them experience breakthrough moments in their marriages.

Get your free resources: getyourmarriageon.com/connection-codes

- 100 Creative Ways to Initiate Sex guide

- 101 Ways to Have Sex guide

- Jump Start Guide (books, articles, podcasts, frameworks)

Get Your Free Core Emotion Wheel: www.connectioncodes.co/podcast

Ready to Transform Your Marriage? Book a Connection Codes certified coach: https://connectioncodes.co/coaches