There's a myth about the ending of relationships: fire, heat, arguments, affairs.

But only about a quarter of divorces occur because of an affair. Half of couples stay together after one of them strays.

The reality is that something more depressing is taking place: the slow, sad decline of once-decent relationships into disappointment and loneliness. 1 in 10 are stuck in what they describe as loveless marriages. 15% of people wish they'd married someone else. An even bigger percentage describe being in sexless relationships.

Why do we end up making each other so unhappy? What goes wrong? How do you identify if you're in one of those relationships, and what should you do about it?

Big topics for Matt and Graham to consider in this episode of Crazy In Love.

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So much of the complexity of relationship advice can be simplified into four words (or five, if you're being pedantic): Don't Be A Jerk.

Of course, the reality is a bit more complex than that.

Matt and Graham talk in today's episode mainly about the single biggest killer of relationships: contempt. What is it? How does it develop in relationships? How can you see it when it's present? And how do you work your way back towards respecting and liking each other when contempt is present?

The Psychology Today blogpost discussed in today's episode is available here.

You've probably heard of it: the Three-Hour Evening.

It’s the latest couples’ hack and involves splitting the evening into chunks – including an hour without phones.

What's not to like? Do your chores, have some couples' time, have some alone time. Perfect.

But who are these mysterious people with young children who have THREE HOURS of time every evening to fill? And, joking aside, even if you only have one hour, does it make sense to split it in the way the Three-Hour Evening suggests?

Matt and Graham dive in, and find that there are some surprisingly useful nuggets of truth here....