It’s 1983. You’re a dumb kid who wants a weird doll. Your parents have been blinded by capitalistic rage. Some kids got what they wanted. Some adults got hurt. Some people made a buttload of money. It was THE CABBAGE PATCH KIDS RIOTS.

Steve and Justin take a trip back in time to explore the moment when all of America lost its mind over a doll that looked like a dimple had a baby: the Cabbage Patch Kid.

Was there any good reason for the violence and greed that overtook Christmas of 1983 besides the doll being “so dang cute”? It doesn’t seem like it. But the deep, weird, and often creepy lore of the dolls themselves is enough to make you ask what was in the water in the early ’80s.

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Check out more from Justin here: justindodd.rocks

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HO HO HO! The holidays are upon us, and the boys are cooking up a holiday feast of disasters, starting with 1985’s holiday miss, Santa Claus: The Movie.

Steve and Justin head to the North Pole to figure out if it’s even possible to tell a straightforward Santa origin story. The lore is messy, the rules are obtuse, and the magic would drive a man to madness.

But the real question is: how can you spend this much money, build sets this big, create special effects this good, have John Lithgow chew the scenery this hard… and it’s still SOOOOO BORING???

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Check out more from Justin here: justindodd.rocks

Check out more from Steve here: stevejhward.com

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In the heyday of ’90s adult-themed television, gritty cop shows were everywhere, but legendary TV producer Steven Bochco was the only one brave enough to ask, “What if they also sing?”

ABC’s COP ROCK is a see-it-to-believe-it Disasterpiece and easily Justin and Steve’s new favorite TV show. Join the boys as they reopen the cold case of the greatest tonal mismatch ever put on prime-time TV. Experience the whiplash of jumping from a tough-as-nails police procedural to some of the goofiest musical numbers they’ve ever seen, alongside some of the saddest songs ever put in a musical.

There are a lot of “how?” questions when it comes to COP ROCK, but the big one for us is: WHY DOESN’T EVERYONE KNOW ABOUT THIS??

Check out all of COP ROCK here!

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Check out more from Justin here: justindodd.rocks

Check out more from Steve here: stevejhward.com

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