We're talking all about intellectual intimacy—what I like to call “brain bonding" in this episode. We spend so much time talking about emotional connection and physical intimacy in marriage, but let me tell you a secret: connecting through ideas, learning, curiosity, and thought-provoking conversations can completely change the game in your relationship.

I open up about a time I was really vulnerable in my own marriage and how an intellectual connection outside of my relationship showed me just how powerful “brain bonding” can be—both for good and for potential danger if it isn’t happening at home. I want to help you experience this kind of closeness with your spouse and see them in a whole new light.

In This Episode

• What Is Intellectual Intimacy?
  I explain how intellectual intimacy is about the closeness that comes from sharing thoughts, dreams, and conversations.
• Brain Bonding Quiz (Interactive Exercise):
  I walk you through a quiz to help you and your spouse see where you stand in this area right now. It’s a simple scoring system that gives you a snapshot of your current “brain bond.”
• Why Intellectual Intimacy Matters:
  If you’ve ever felt bored or stuck in your marriage, you’re not alone! I share why keeping curiosity and deep conversations alive is crucial for staying connected and avoiding dangerous disconnects.
• Barriers to Intellectual Intimacy:
  We talk about the common things that get in the way—like not even knowing this kind of connection mattered, feeling intimidated, etc.
• How to Build Intellectual Intimacy:
• • Ask better questions. Move past “how was your day?” and get curious about your spouse’s thoughts and experiences.
  • Learn something together. Whether it’s reading, listening to a podcast, or learning about a new topic, do it as a team.
  • Debate respectfully. It’s okay to see things differently—what matters is how you talk about it.
  • And more
• Your Homework:
  At the end of the episode, I challenge you to:
• • Pick a Rebuilding Us podcast episode (or a YouTube video I’ve done!) and listen separately, then come together and talk about it.
  • Ask your spouse one thoughtful, below-the-surface question this week.

Resources & Links

• Join My Group Coaching Community: danache.com/covenantconnections
• Podcast Show Notes and More: danashay.com/podcast
• Also listen to Ep. 364 - Chemistry or Intimacy?
• Get your FREE Intimacy Guide: for interactive tools to assess your intimacy

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Tony and Alisa DiLorenzo of One Extraordinary Marriage are here to help us improve our sexual intimacy! If you're ready to transform your marriage and reignite the passion, join me and this legendary duo for a candid and hope-filled conversation on sexual intimacy, healing, and how a chance "sex challenge" changed everything in their marriage.

In this episode, you’ll discover:

• What REALLY builds intimacy in the bedroom (it’s not just about sex!)
• The difference between physical and sexual intimacy
• How Tony & Alisa’s famous 60-Day Sex Challenge changed their marriage—and led to a worldwide movement
• How to talk honestly about your bedroom struggles and why authenticity is the secret sauce
• Tips for being present, not perfect, in your sex life
• What to do if your marriage is going through a “sexless” phase
  …and so much more!

Plus, don’t miss my real-life advice for working through resentment, getting intentional about connection, and building a marriage legacy that lasts for generations. This episode will bless couples at every stage, from newlyweds to marriage vets!

Resources Mentioned in this Episode:

Find out your strongest intimacy pillar at onextraordinarymarriage.com/quiz.

Purchase the 6 Pillars of Intimacy book

Download my FREE Intimacy Series guide here.

Learn more about my marriage group "Covenant Connections" here.

Follow Dana Che on the socials!

Instagram

Facebook

YouTube

Like the show? Be sure to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW the podcast! Then, give it a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ rating and leave a great review!

Support the show: https://danache.com/donations/support-the-show/

Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.

Emotional intimacy is a cornerstone you can’t ignore if you’re on a journey to deeper, more authentic relationships—whether in your marriage, friendships, or even workplace. We're joined in this episode by psychotherapist and author Jessica Baum to discuss attachment styles. This is a goldmine for anyone who craves real connection or wonders why emotional closeness sometimes feels out of reach.

Let’s dig into the episode’s biggest insights, actionable takeaways, and why understanding your attachment style might be the key to transforming your relationships for good.

Key Takeaways:

• What is Emotional Intimacy?

• Intro to Attachment Theory

• Can You Change Your Attachment Style

• Intensity vs. Intimacy

• The Importance of Emotional Presence

Resources Mentioned:

Jessica's Free "Attachment Blueprint" and link to her new book: SAFE.

Dana Che's Free Intimacy Series Guide to create more intimacy in your relationships.

Follow Dana Che on the socials!

Instagram

Facebook

YouTube

Like the show? Be sure to SUBSCRIBE/FOLLOW the podcast! Then, give it a ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ rating and leave a great review!

Support the show: https://danache.com/donations/support-the-show/

Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.