Big goals are exciting - and they are also where most people freeze. In this episode, we unpack why “perfect planning” is often just disguised avoidance, and why clarity rarely arrives before you move. Instead, clarity is local: you only get it after you take the next step.

We introduce the Fogged Bridge metaphor for real change: you cannot see the full path, the planks do not appear all at once, and uncertainty is not a problem to solve - it is the medium you move through. Whether you are trying to eat healthier, train consistently, build a business, or finally start a creative project, the same principle applies: big aims don’t require big starts. They require the next small step.

We also challenge the willpower narrative. Self-demands often create rebellion, procrastination, and anxiety. The alternative is negotiation - lowering the friction, shrinking the ask, and building momentum through repeatable wins (like making one healthy snack, doing one minute of stillness, showing up for the next class). Along the way, we explore why New Year’s resolutions fail, how your “why” determines your direction, and why every “wrong step” still produces the clarity you need for the next right one.

On this episode of SHL, Ryan and MJ had the pleasure to sit down and chat with Alysha Gebo about IFS (internal Family Systems) and how this way to thinking and relating to one's own mind can be transformative. Compared and analyzed against a new model of thought, Nested Observed Window, this discussion introduces both of these concepts on a surface level.

These models can be used to unlock perspective and self-understanding!

In this special episode of SHL, we've compiled a number of clips that were either pre-recording discussions, bloopers, or otherwise!

Thanks so much for all the support, and we hope you enjoy a little behind-the-scenes look! Video is recommended for this episode!