At this Sunday Morning Café gathering, Dr. Tom Wagner explores how everyday gratitude practices cultivate resilience—especially during the holidays. Framed by personal “foundational stories” and research insights, Tom introduces the idea of doing intentional “beauty checks,” a practice of stopping to notice and savor what’s good even in hard moments. The evening blends music, guided reflection, small-group sharing, and a contemplative “sacred breathing” exercise inspired by the Ignatian Examen and somatic psychotherapy. Together, participants form a pop-up community that remembers loved ones, celebrates life, and practices showing up for one another with authenticity, curiosity, and care.

Key Takeaways

• Gratitude leads to resilience: Decades of psychology and resilience research link simple, repeatable gratitude practices to deeper well-being.
• Do “Beauty Checks”: In stress, hunt the good stuff—intentionally look for small, specific moments of beauty and savor them. This “defiant positivity” fuels strength in storms, not by denying pain but by noticing light within it.
• You don’t have to be grateful for everything: Some experiences simply hurt. But even in the hard, there is often something to notice, receive, or savor that helps you take the next step.
• Stories shape us: Personal and family stories become lenses for meaning. Retelling them across seasons of life reveals new layers—and can become reliable sources of courage and perspective.
• Community is medicine: When we share honestly (and listen with curiosity instead of advice), we become “rainy day people” for each other. Ordinary kindness changes outcomes.

Reflection Questions

• Tell the story of a challenging time that you have been through…. What did you learn from that time? What were some practices that got you through? Was there a person, or people who were a blessing to you during that time? Looking back, what was something you learned about yourself during that challenging period?
• Tell the story of a challenge you are facing right now. Is there any wisdom you picked up in past difficult times that you can use in this situation?
• Gordon Lightfoot, that great singer/songwriter from days gone by, wrote a song entitled, “Rainy Day People.” That song describes people who come closer when times get harder. When and where have you been a rainy day friend for somebody?

Resources & Links

• Join us live for the 2/15 SMC Event on relationships – whether you’re single or in a couple, this one’s for you!: https://www.tomwagnerspeaker.com/events
• SMC events honor that what is deepest within us is most universal between us. Your gift helps create space for reflection, connection, and belonging — donate here: https://gofund.me/8cb4f9463
 100% of donations are dedicated to the cost associated with bringing SMC events to more people, more often.
• Celia – featured musician: https://www.celiaisrock.com/

Stay Connected with Dr. Tom Wagner & the SMC Community

• Sign up for Dr. Tom’s newsletter: tomwagnerspeaker.com/contact
• Website: tomwagnerspeaker.com
• Blog: tomwagnerspeaker.com/blog
• Facebook: facebook.com/DrTomWagner
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drtomwagner
• LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/dr-tom-wagner

Join Dr. Tom Wagner at the September Sunday Morning Cafe event, a gathering where adults of all ages explore connection, reflection, and personal growth. In this episode, Dr. Tom and his daughter Annalise Wagner introduce the topic “Courageous Conversations.” Attendees share candid stories about family dynamics, the challenges of difficult relationships, and the importance of staying true to oneself. Through heartfelt reflections, guided meditation, and live music, participants experience moments of collective resonance, love, and healing, while discovering practical approaches for navigating life’s interpersonal complexities.

Key Takeaways

• Authenticity is essential: staying true to who you are allows you to continue showing love, even when others don’t reciprocate.
• Difficult relationships require both strategy and self-compassion—sometimes loving from a distance or surrounding others with positive intent is the healthiest approach.
• Emotional honesty, including anger or sadness, can be a tool for effective and courageous communication.
• Mindful practices such as meditation and breath awareness cultivate inner peace and connection with others.
• Music and shared experiences create a collective resonance that strengthens community bonds.
• Supporting and participating in meaningful communal events fosters a sense of belonging, healing, and purpose.

Reflection Questions

• Briefly write the story of a difficult conversation that turned out really well, maybe even better than you had anticipated that it would go. What were the elements of that conversation that led to such a great outcome?
• Briefly write the story of a hard conversation that did not go well. What did you learn from that experience? What would you do differently if you could do it over again?
• Is there a hard conversation that you need to have with someone? If you have been putting it off, why do you think you’ve been avoiding it? What kind of support would you need to have that conversation?

Resources & Links

• Join us live for the SMC Event on 11/2, “Navigating Thanksgiving with Grace and Gratitude”: https://www.tomwagnerspeaker.com/events
• Interested in helping Sunday Morning Café grow—through financial support or other ways? We’d love to hear from you: contact@tomwagnerspeaker.com.
• Lynn O’Brien – featured musician: https://www.lynnobrien.love/

Stay Connected with Dr. Tom Wagner & the SMC Community

• Sign up for Dr. Tom’s newsletter: tomwagnerspeaker.com/contact
• Website: tomwagnerspeaker.com
• Blog: tomwagnerspeaker.com/blog
• Facebook: facebook.com/DrTomWagner
• LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/dr-tom-wagner

Join Dr. Tom Wagner as he reflects on his journey through South Africa, sharing encounters with remarkable individuals whose names carry stories of patience, resilience, and quiet courage. In this episode, you’ll hear how listening attentively to another’s story—and allowing yourself to be known—can open the door to deeper connection.

Key Takeaways

• Every name carries a story—taking the time to know it is an act of courage and connection.
• Vulnerability and openness foster authentic relationships.
• Slowing down to connect with others is a countercultural yet essential antidote to loneliness.
• Even quiet courage—simply showing up, paying attention, and being present—can have profound impact.
• Courageous conversations aren’t just about big topics—they can happen in everyday interactions when we engage sincerely.
• Reflection, storytelling, and attentive listening help cultivate deeper connection with self and others.

Reflection Questions

• Do you attempt this form of courage in some way, shape, or form? When you do it, what is your technique? If you don’t do it, would you be willing to experiment with such behavior?
• Who do you know who is particularly good at listening to a story and asking good questions that draw out the storyteller? How do they do that?
• Who do you know that tells a good story? What makes them a good storyteller?
• Have you ever resolved to hang in there with someone who is a miserable storyteller as a way of honoring them despite their skills? What helped you do that?
• When was the last time you connected with someone who has a radically different political orientation from yours? Were you able to get deep enough to make contact with your common humanity?

Resources & Links

• Join us for the next Sunday Morning Cafe Event on 9/21: https://www.tomwagnerspeaker.com/events

Stay Connected with Dr. Tom Wagner & the SMC Community

• Sign up for Dr. Tom’s newsletter: tomwagnerspeaker.com/contact
• Website: tomwagnerspeaker.com
• Blog: tomwagnerspeaker.com/blog
• Facebook: facebook.com/DrTomWagner
• LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/dr-tom-wagner