This episode breaks down the major misconceptions about ADHD treatment and clarifies what decades of research, major clinical guidelines, and leading experts actually recommend. Ryan and Mike explain why weekly talk therapy is not an evidence-based treatment for ADHD, why parent training and environmental structure are consistently shown to improve outcomes, and how parents can make informed decisions without getting pulled into common myths.

Find Mike @ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.grownowadhd.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ & on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠IG⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
Find Ryan @ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.adhddude.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ & on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Youtube

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[00:00:00] Start
[00:02:21] What clinical guidelines actually recommend
[00:05:27] Dr. Barkley’s research on effective ADHD treatments
[00:09:11] Evidence on CBT, DBT, and play therapy
[00:19:21] Why office-based therapy doesn’t translate to real-world behavior
[00:22:29] Rumination and how talk-heavy approaches can backfire
[00:31:19] Treatments with the strongest evidence (medication, parent training)⁠⁠⁠

Citations:

1. AAP Guideline (Parent Training + Medication as First-Line)Wolraich, M. L., et al. (2019). Clinical practice guideline for ADHD in children and adolescents. Pediatrics, 144(4), e20192528.

2. AACAP Treatment Parameter (Medication + Behavioral)Pliszka, S. R., & AACAP Work Group. (2007). Practice parameter for ADHD. JAACAP, 46(7), 894–921.

3. Barkley: ADHD as Performance DisorderBarkley, R. A. (2012). Executive functions. Guilford Press.Barkley, R. A. (2015). ADHD: Handbook for diagnosis and treatment (4th ed.). Guilford Press.

4. CBT Evidence (Adolescents/Adults, Not Young Children)Safren, S. A., et al. (2010). CBT vs relaxation for adults with ADHD. JAMA, 304(8), 875–880.Solanto, M. V. (2011). CBT for adult ADHD. Guilford Press.Langberg, J. M., et al. (2008). Organization skills intervention for adolescents. JCCP, 76(6), 967–982.

5. DBT-Informed (Pilot Trials, Emotion Dysregulation)Murray, D. W., et al. (2022). DBT skills group for adolescents with ADHD. J Attention Disorders, 26(11), 1421–1430.

6. Play Therapy (Insufficient Evidence)Hassan, R. A., & Shaker, N. S. (2014). CBPT for ADHD symptoms. Int J Psychology & Behavioral Sciences, 4(6), 221–229.

7. EF Skills: Experience-Based, Not Language-BasedBarkley, R. A. (2012). Executive functions. Guilford Press.

8. Rumination and ADHDOstojic, D., et al. (2021). Mind wandering and rumination in youth with ADHD. J Abnormal Child Psychology, 49, 1203–1216.Seymour, K. E., et al. (2014). Emotion regulation mediates ADHD-depression relationship. J Abnormal Child Psychology, 42, 611–621.

9. Time Blindness/Temporal ProcessingToplak, M. E., & Tannock, R. (2005). Time perception deficits in ADHD. J Abnormal Child Psychology, 33(5), 639–654.Barkley, R. A., et al. (2008). ADHD in adults: What the science says. Guilford Press.

10. Parent Behavior Training (Evidence-Based)Chronis, A. M., et al. (2006). Evidence-based treatments for children with ADHD. Clinical Psychology Review, 26(4), 486–502.Evans, S. W., et al. (2014). Evidence-based treatments for ADHD. JCCAP, 43(4), 527–551.

11. Medication as First-LineFaraone, S. V., et al. (2021). Stimulant effectiveness and safety. World Psychiatry, 20(3), 314–329.Swanson, J. M., et al. (2017). MTA study long-term outcomes. JAACAP, 56(3), 228–240.

This is part 2 of "Your Child Is Not Your Co-Parent". Ryan and Mike continue examining why popular “gentle” and heavy emotional-validation parenting approaches often backfire for kids with ADHD. They break down the research, explain the leadership needs of ADHD brains, and outline why overtalking, overprocessing, and overnegotiating increase dysregulation rather than calming it.

Find Mike @ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.grownowadhd.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ & on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠IG⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
Find Ryan @ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.adhddude.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ & on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Youtube⁠⁠⁠

{{chapters}}
[00:00:00] Start
[00:00:46] Rise of emotional-validation parenting
[00:01:58] Why emotional processing overwhelms ADHD brains
[00:02:48] ADHD kids’ need for clear leadership and hierarchy
[00:05:20] How “armchair therapy” increases dysregulation
[00:07:07] Why too much talking makes tasks feel bigger
[00:08:29] Non-hierarchical relationships and rising anxiety
[00:10:08] Impact of inconsistent leadership
[00:12:26] Comfort-zone parenting and avoidance
[00:13:58] The “four D’s” and building flexibility
[00:15:48] How avoidance worsens anxiety and rigidity
[00:17:13] How guidance—not rescue—builds confidence
[00:18:16] Three core takeaways for ADHD parents

Citations:

Baumrind, D. (1991). The influence of parenting style on adolescent competence and substance use. Journal of Early Adolescence, 11(1), 56–95.

Chronis-Tuscano, A., et al. (2011). Parenting behavior and child conduct problems in children with ADHD. Journal of Clinical Child and Adolescent Psychology, 40(1), 44–57.

Evans, S. W., Owens, J. S., & Bunford, N. (2014). Evidence based psychosocial treatments for children and adolescents with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. Journal of Clinical Child and Adolescent Psychology, 43(4), 527–551.

Johnston, C., & Mash, E. J. (2001). Families of children with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. Journal of Clinical Child Psychology, 30(4), 479–495.

Ma, I., van Duijvenvoorde, A. C. K., & Scheres, A. (2020). Cognitive rigidity in ADHD. Journal of Attention Disorders, 24(5), 707–718.

Steinberg, L. (2001). We know some things: Parent adolescent relationships in retrospect and prospect. Journal of Research on Adolescence, 11(1), 1–19.

In this first half of a two-part episode, Ryan and Mike break down why many modern parenting approaches—especially those centered on constant negotiation and seeking a child’s input for every decision—backfire for kids with ADHD. They outline how clear leadership, predictable structure, and authoritative (not authoritarian) parenting create emotional safety, reduce conflict, and support executive functioning.

Find Mike @ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.grownowadhd.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ & on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠IG⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
Find Ryan @ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠www.adhddude.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ & on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Youtube⁠⁠⁠

{{chapters}}
[00:00:00] Start
[00:00:41] What “co-parenting” your child means
[00:03:14] Authoritative parenting overview
[00:04:13] Research: structure supports regulation
[00:07:42] Research: clarity improves social functioning
[00:09:40] Routines, EF, and independence
[00:12:00] Why negotiation backfires
[00:16:10] Cognitive rigidity & too many choices
[00:19:00] Inconsistent expectations worsen symptoms

Citations:

Baumrind, D. (1991). The influence of parenting style on adolescent competence and substance use. Journal of Early Adolescence, 11(1), 56–95.

Chronis-Tuscano, A., et al. (2011). Parenting behavior and child conduct problems in children with ADHD. Journal of Clinical Child and Adolescent Psychology, 40(1), 44–57.

Evans, S. W., Owens, J. S., & Bunford, N. (2014). Evidence based psychosocial treatments for children and adolescents with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. Journal of Clinical Child and Adolescent Psychology, 43(4), 527–551.

Johnston, C., & Mash, E. J. (2001). Families of children with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. Journal of Clinical Child Psychology, 30(4), 479–495.

Ma, I., van Duijvenvoorde, A. C. K., & Scheres, A. (2020). Cognitive rigidity in ADHD. Journal of Attention Disorders, 24(5), 707–718.

Steinberg, L. (2001). We know some things: Parent adolescent relationships in retrospect and prospect. Journal of Research on Adolescence, 11(1), 1–19.