You've heard me say it before: feedback too early in your writing process is useless at best and derailing at worst. But at some point, feedback from readers you trust becomes absolutely critical.

In this episode, I'm sharing two concrete examples from my memoir You Might Feel a Little Pressure—one story I was resistant to cutting and one I almost cut but didn't. Both taught me something important about when feedback matters, how many people you need to hear from before making big decisions, and why reasonable people can disagree about what belongs in your book.

If you've ever gotten conflicting feedback or weren't sure whether to take someone's advice, this episode is for you.

Love the show? Share it with a fellow writer or leave a review! For more resources, visit thebookincubator.com.

Let's connect! Come say hi on Instagram: @book.incubator

Happy writing! — Mary

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RESOURCES:

+ Learn my Four Notebooks Method & get your free template: http://bit.ly/3wGmMTc

+ A Novel in 52 Prompts - A scene-by-scene blueprint for writing your novel: https://www.thebookincubator.com/novel-in-52-prompts

+ Ready to write your dream book? Apply for The Book Incubator in just 5 minutes with no obligation to enroll and get my free 60-minute training HOW TO WRITE YOUR DREAM BOOK WITH A FULL-TIME JOB (AND A LIFE): https://bit.ly/3wEwrJQ

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Hi, I'm Mary!

I'm the author of the novels When You Read This (Indie Next Pick and “Best Book of 2019” by Good Housekeeping), Privilege (Today.com “Best Summer Read”), and Palm Beach (New York Post “Best Book of 2021” and “like a sandy beach, equal parts beautiful and uncomfortable” according to the Associated Press). My memoir, You Might Feel A Little Pressure, was released by Third Rail Press in 2025.

My books have been published in 13 countries, and I've written for the New York Times, The Atlantic, Slate, and more. I founded an MFA-alternative, The Book Incubator, which has now helped hundreds of writers finish their books over 12 months and continues supporting them through publication (yes, forever!).

When I’m not writing, I’m probably building a fort with my 7-year-old son Finn or bathing with an overpriced Lush bath bomb. I live in Dallas, where I spend my free time trying to domesticate a stubborn tabby and shamelessly watching reality TV.

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Social:

+ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/book.incubator

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#writingtips #bookwriting #writer #authortube

Ever get feedback that makes your stomach drop? Like when someone says "I don't know what your book is about" or "I didn't relate to this character"—and suddenly you're convinced you need three months to fix it? Here's the truth: most "big" feedback requires WAY less work than it sounds like. Sometimes it's one paragraph. Sometimes it's literally one sentence.

In this episode, I share a story about a writer who got devastating feedback—and how we fixed the entire problem with about 12 words. Then I break down why feedback feels so overwhelming and what it actually takes to implement it.

You'll learn:

• Why feedback packaged in generalizations feels bigger than it is • The actual writing required to fix common "big" issues • How to assess what feedback really means in terms of work • Why figuring out character motivation in fiction is SO different than in real life • Concrete time estimates for common feedback (from "3 minutes" to "a few weeks")

Download the free Feedback Reality Check Guide: https://prodigious-inventor-6525.kit.com/c778014a10 This spreadsheet shows you the actual estimated time commitment for 7 common pieces of "feels big" feedback.

Love the show? Share it with a fellow writer or leave a review! For more resources, visit thebookincubator.com.

Let's connect! Come say hi on Instagram: @book.incubator ( / book.incubator )

Happy writing! — Mary

========================

RESOURCES:

Learn my Four Notebooks Method & get your free template: http://bit.ly/3wGmMTc

A Novel in 52 Prompts - A scene-by-scene blueprint for writing your novel: https://www.thebookincubator.com/novel-in-52-prompts

Ready to write your dream book? Apply for The Book Incubator in just 5 minutes with no obligation to enroll and get my free 60-minute training HOW TO WRITE YOUR DREAM BOOK WITH A FULL-TIME JOB (AND A LIFE): https://bit.ly/3wEwrJQ

In this Season 10 premiere of The First Draft Club, I'm sharing about times when I've encountered "expert" advice that sounded smart but felt wrong—and why I now think trusting that feeling is one of the most important skills you can develop as a writer.

You'll learn: • Why impressive credentials don't always mean good advice • The problem with "show don't tell" and other condescending writing rules • How to recognize when advice will empower you vs. make you feel small • Why your gut instinct is more valuable than you think (especially as a beginner) • The difference between advice that sounds smart and advice that actually helps you write

If you've ever felt paralyzed by writing advice that made you feel like you'll never get it "right," this episode is for you. It's time to trust yourself.

Love the show? Share it with a fellow writer or leave a review! For more resources, visit thebookincubator.com.

Let's connect! Come say hi on Instagram: @book.incubator ( / book.incubator )

Happy writing! — Mary

========================

RESOURCES:

Learn my Four Notebooks Method & get your free template: http://bit.ly/3wGmMTc

A Novel in 52 Prompts - A scene-by-scene blueprint for writing your novel: https://www.thebookincubator.com/nove...

Ready to write your dream book? Apply for The Book Incubator in just 5 minutes with no obligation to enroll and get my free 60-minute training HOW TO WRITE YOUR DREAM BOOK WITH A FULL-TIME JOB (AND A LIFE): https://bit.ly/3wEwrJQ