You've heard me say it before: feedback too early in your writing process is useless at best and derailing at worst. But at some point, feedback from readers you trust becomes absolutely critical.

In this episode, I'm sharing two concrete examples from my memoir You Might Feel a Little Pressure—one story I was resistant to cutting and one I almost cut but didn't. Both taught me something important about when feedback matters, how many people you need to hear from before making big decisions, and why reasonable people can disagree about what belongs in your book.

If you've ever gotten conflicting feedback or weren't sure whether to take someone's advice, this episode is for you.

Love the show? Share it with a fellow writer or leave a review! For more resources, visit thebookincubator.com.

Let's connect! Come say hi on Instagram: @book.incubator

Happy writing! — Mary

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RESOURCES:

+ Learn my Four Notebooks Method & get your free template: http://bit.ly/3wGmMTc

+ A Novel in 52 Prompts - A scene-by-scene blueprint for writing your novel: https://www.thebookincubator.com/novel-in-52-prompts

+ Ready to write your dream book? Apply for The Book Incubator in just 5 minutes with no obligation to enroll and get my free 60-minute training HOW TO WRITE YOUR DREAM BOOK WITH A FULL-TIME JOB (AND A LIFE): https://bit.ly/3wEwrJQ

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Hi, I'm Mary!

I'm the author of the novels When You Read This (Indie Next Pick and “Best Book of 2019” by Good Housekeeping), Privilege (Today.com “Best Summer Read”), and Palm Beach (New York Post “Best Book of 2021” and “like a sandy beach, equal parts beautiful and uncomfortable” according to the Associated Press). My memoir, You Might Feel A Little Pressure, was released by Third Rail Press in 2025.

My books have been published in 13 countries, and I've written for the New York Times, The Atlantic, Slate, and more. I founded an MFA-alternative, The Book Incubator, which has now helped hundreds of writers finish their books over 12 months and continues supporting them through publication (yes, forever!).

When I’m not writing, I’m probably building a fort with my 7-year-old son Finn or bathing with an overpriced Lush bath bomb. I live in Dallas, where I spend my free time trying to domesticate a stubborn tabby and shamelessly watching reality TV.

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Social:

+ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/book.incubator

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#writingtips #bookwriting #writer #authortube

Ever get feedback that makes your stomach drop? Like when someone says "I don't know what your book is about" or "I didn't relate to this character"—and suddenly you're convinced you need three months to fix it? Here's the truth: most "big" feedback requires WAY less work than it sounds like. Sometimes it's one paragraph. Sometimes it's literally one sentence.

In this episode, I share a story about a writer who got devastating feedback—and how we fixed the entire problem with about 12 words. Then I break down why feedback feels so overwhelming and what it actually takes to implement it.

You'll learn:

• Why feedback packaged in generalizations feels bigger than it is • The actual writing required to fix common "big" issues • How to assess what feedback really means in terms of work • Why figuring out character motivation in fiction is SO different than in real life • Concrete time estimates for common feedback (from "3 minutes" to "a few weeks")

Download the free Feedback Reality Check Guide: https://prodigious-inventor-6525.kit.com/c778014a10 This spreadsheet shows you the actual estimated time commitment for 7 common pieces of "feels big" feedback.

Love the show? Share it with a fellow writer or leave a review! For more resources, visit thebookincubator.com.

Let's connect! Come say hi on Instagram: @book.incubator ( / book.incubator )

Happy writing! — Mary

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RESOURCES:

Learn my Four Notebooks Method & get your free template: http://bit.ly/3wGmMTc

A Novel in 52 Prompts - A scene-by-scene blueprint for writing your novel: https://www.thebookincubator.com/novel-in-52-prompts

Ready to write your dream book? Apply for The Book Incubator in just 5 minutes with no obligation to enroll and get my free 60-minute training HOW TO WRITE YOUR DREAM BOOK WITH A FULL-TIME JOB (AND A LIFE): https://bit.ly/3wEwrJQ

In this Season 10 premiere of The First Draft Club, I'm sharing about times when I've encountered "expert" advice that sounded smart but felt wrong—and why I now think trusting that feeling is one of the most important skills you can develop as a writer.

You'll learn: • Why impressive credentials don't always mean good advice • The problem with "show don't tell" and other condescending writing rules • How to recognize when advice will empower you vs. make you feel small • Why your gut instinct is more valuable than you think (especially as a beginner) • The difference between advice that sounds smart and advice that actually helps you write

If you've ever felt paralyzed by writing advice that made you feel like you'll never get it "right," this episode is for you. It's time to trust yourself.

Love the show? Share it with a fellow writer or leave a review! For more resources, visit thebookincubator.com.

Let's connect! Come say hi on Instagram: @book.incubator ( / book.incubator )

Happy writing! — Mary

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RESOURCES:

Learn my Four Notebooks Method & get your free template: http://bit.ly/3wGmMTc

A Novel in 52 Prompts - A scene-by-scene blueprint for writing your novel: https://www.thebookincubator.com/nove...

Ready to write your dream book? Apply for The Book Incubator in just 5 minutes with no obligation to enroll and get my free 60-minute training HOW TO WRITE YOUR DREAM BOOK WITH A FULL-TIME JOB (AND A LIFE): https://bit.ly/3wEwrJQ

Tired of being told you're either an "outliner" or a "pantser"? In this episode, Mary introduces a revolutionary new framework that recognizes writers exist on a spectrum—not just at two extremes.

Based on years of teaching novelists through The Book Incubator™, she reveals five distinct writer types that help you find your perfect writing process.

From her own journey discovering that neither pantsing nor outlining worked for her (leading to 13 rewrites over six years!), Mary developed this new typology that helps writers identify their ideal level of planning versus creative freedom.

If you've ever felt like existing writing advice doesn't fit your natural creative process, this episode will help you discover where you fall on the spectrum and how to optimize your approach for the best possible writing experience.

🎧 What you’ll learn:

✅ Why the outliner vs. pantser binary doesn't serve most writers ✅ The five distinct novelist types and what each needs to succeed ✅ How to identify your writer type based on what "lights you up" ✅ Why having a "Big Question" is crucial for every writer type ✅ The tools each type uses ✅ How to move along the spectrum as your needs change ✅ Why finding the right process dramatically increases your chances of finishing your book

RESOURCES MENTIONED • The Book Incubator™ Program: https://www.thebookincubator.com/

• The Four Notebooks Method - full training available after application & acceptance to The Book Incubator: https://maryadkinswriter.com/podcast/the-four-notebooks-method

• Podcast episode about A Novel in 52 Prompts PLUS the first 3 prompts free: https://open.spotify.com/episode/34hNY3NH794fg6fNumO4wo?si=mmq4XjA5SBC9VTm1EK3Yjw

• A Novel in 52 Prompts: https://www.thebookincubator.com/novel-in-52-prompts

• Take the Five Novelist Types Assessment: https://writertypes.thebookincubator.com/

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Love the show? Share it with a fellow writer or leave a review! For more resources, visit thebookincubator.com.

Let’s connect! Come say hi on Instagram: @book.incubator (https://www.instagram.com/book.incubator/)

Happy writing! — Mary

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I’m Mary Adkins, author with HarperCollins and book writing coach (for novels and memoirs). I’m so glad you found me!

+ Learn my Four Notebooks Method & get your free template: http://bit.ly/3wGmMTc

+ Ready to write your dream book? Apply for my program The Book Incubator in just 5 minutes with no obligation to enroll and get my free 60-minute training HOW TO WRITE YOUR DREAM BOOK WITH A FULL-TIME JOB (AND A LIFE):

https://bit.ly/3wEwrJQ

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Mary Adkins is a recovered lawyer, mom to a goofy kid, novelist, and writing coach.

She moved from the hectic world of corporate law into novel-writing…and has published 3 novels (and counting!) with HarperCollins.

During her career transition, she learned a whole bunch of stuff about what works and what doesn’t when it comes to writing, revising, landing an agent, and getting published. She created www.thebookincubator.com to help aspiring writers on their journey.

Want to improve your craft, get your book done, and—most importantly—make it FUN again?

Learn more about The Book Incubator™ at https://www.thebookincubator.com/

Sometimes the best creative advice comes from the most unexpected teachers. In this episode, Mary shares three powerful insights about artistic confidence and creative decision-making—learned from watching her 7-year-old son navigate art ownership and musical performance.

If you've ever found yourself seeking permission for creative choices or writing by committee instead of trusting your vision, this episode offers a refreshing perspective on artistic ownership and creative confidence.

🎧 What You'll Learn: ✅ Why treating art as conversation (not sacred object) transforms your creative process ✅ How to develop the confidence to make creative decisions without seeking permission ✅ The difference between artistic confidence and writing by committee ✅ The power of pure trust in your creative vision

Want more? Apply for The Book Incubator: https://www.thebookincubator.com/ Follow on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/book.incubator/ Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@maryadkins

Love this episode? Subscribe to First Draft Club and leave us a review! Your support helps other writers discover the show.

How do you motivate yourself to work toward big, overwhelming goals when gratification feels impossibly far away? In this episode, Mary shares her summer reality check: facing an entire house to organize, French lessons to restart, and a secret new watercolor hobby—all while running a business and raising a kid.

Drawing from her experience writing five books, Mary reveals the counter-intuitive secret to achieving long-term goals. She shares how she went from writing zero short stories to publishing her first novel, why she's skipping watercolor exercises to paint portraits, and what her French tutor taught her about the futility of "homework."

If you've ever felt overwhelmed by the sheer scope of your writing goals, this episode offers a refreshing perspective on how to stay motivated when the finish line is nowhere in sight.

🎧 What you’ll learn:

✅ Why willpower alone isn't enough for long-term goals ✅ The mindset shift that makes big projects sustainable ✅ How to find motivation when gratification is months away ✅ Why skipping the "basics" might be exactly what you need ✅ How to let your mood guide your writing choices ✅ The overlap between "hard" and "fun" in creative work ✅ Real strategies for staying excited about your writing process

Want more? Apply for The Book Incubator: https://www.thebookincubator.com/ Follow on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/book.incubator/ Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@maryadkins

Love this episode? Subscribe to First Draft Club and leave us a review! Your support helps other writers discover the show.

Ever started researching for your novel only to get so overwhelmed by everything you learned that you couldn't write at all? In this episode, Mary introduces the "marginalia method"—a simple but powerful technique that prevents research overwhelm while making the process more fun and efficient.

Mary breaks down the two common research traps writers fall into: research overwhelm (feeling paralyzed by too much information) and research fanaticism (trying to include everything you've learned). She then shares her practical solution that keeps research manageable and actionable.

If you've ever felt stuck because your research made your story feel too complex, or if you want to make your research process more productive, this episode will give you a game-changing tool.

🎧 What you'll learn:

✅ Why starting with a "Big Question" is crucial for novel success ✅ The two research traps that stop writers from finishing their books ✅ How the marginalia method prevents research overwhelm ✅ Why constraints actually make you more creative, not less ✅ How to make research feel like a treasure hunt instead of homework ✅ The practical steps for implementing this method today

Want more? Apply for The Book Incubator: https://www.thebookincubator.com/ Follow on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/book.incubator/ Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@maryadkins

Love this episode? Subscribe to First Draft Club and leave us a review! Your support helps other writers discover the show.

What happens when a bestselling author annotates her own 25-year-old novel? In this episode, Mary shares what she discovered reading Ann Patchett's newly annotated edition of "Bel Canto"—and why it taught her something crucial about how we treat our past creative work and ourselves.

Ann Patchett's handwritten notes in the margins revealed something unexpected: even successful authors can be too hard on their younger selves.

Mary breaks down the three types of annotations Patchett made and shares a personal story about memoir feedback that changed how she thinks about self-compassion in writing.

If you've ever cringed at your old writing or been too critical of your past creative work, this episode offers a mindset shift that every writer needs to hear.

Want more? Apply for The Book Incubator: https://www.thebookincubator.com/ Follow on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/book.incubator/ Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@maryadkins

Love this episode? Subscribe to First Draft Club and leave us a review! Your support helps other writers discover the show.