A half-hour- long (plus a bit) Ha'penny Horror 'Hursday minisode IN WHICH —

0:02:48: THE BLACK BAND; OR, THE COMPANIONS OF MIDNIGHT; IN WHICH —:

• The scene cuts back to Lady Edith Merton, now a prisoner in her boudoir and guarded by a trio of burly madhouse matrons. Then she is awakened in the middle of the night for a secret journey to MacLomond Castle, which is to be her own private asylum in Scotland. It’s a damp, gloomy place with watchtowers and a moat. Such surroundings might drive her mad for real, except for one thing — at one of the railroad stations along the way, someone sent her a telegram containing the single word “hope.” Who could have sent it? And why?

Join host Finn J.D. John. for a half-hour-long spree through the darkest and loathliest stories seen on the streets of early-Victorian London! Grab a flicker of blue ruin, switch off your mirror neurons, and let's go!

GLOSSARY OF FLASH TERMS USED IN THIS EPISODE:

• BULLY ROCKS: Thugs at the service of a brothel madam.
• COLLEGIATES: Penitentiary prisoners.
• KNIGHTS OF THE BRUSH AND MOON: Drunken fellows wandering amok in meadows and ditches, trying to stagger home.
• FLATS: Innocent, not-too-smart persons who are duped by "sharps." In other words, suckers.
• BUMS: Bailiffs.
• CRAPPING COVES: Pronounced "crêpe-ing," it means hangmen, who cause the widows of the criminals they execute to wear crêpe in mourning.
• THE OLD STONE JUG: Newgate Prison, or prisons in general.
• PADDINGTON FAIR: Execution day at Tyburn Tree gallows, which was located in Paddington parish.

A "spicy" (-ish) Tuesday Twopenny Torrid minisode IN WHICH —

0:01:45: ROSE MORTIMER; or, THE BALLET-GIRL'S REVENGE, Ch. 8, IN WHICH —:

• We return to the estate of Count Lerno. The Count has invited a young man named Edgar Deville to his estate for a week’s debauchery; then he has to run to town for a few days, leaving Edgar at the house. Make yourself at home, the Count tells him; but, do not enter the blocked-off portion of the house. Do you think young Edgar will be able to resist the temptation to investigate? And what will be the consequence if he does? We shall see …

0:15:40: TWO SALACIOUS SALOON SONGS:

• "Venus and the Devil; or, The Fiery Tail!" which was a jocular song about the alleged Satanic origins of venereal disease;
• "The Fresh-water Cods." A cock-and-hen-club song about a pair of skinnydipping maidens, and their adventures with a pair of strange-looking fish sticking up out of the water, which turned out to be attached to a pair of local young men ...

0:22:10: THREE DIRTY JOKES ... followed by ...

0:26:40: TWO CLEAN JOKES.

Join host Corinthian Finn, a.k.a. Finn J.D. John, for a half-hour-long spree through the scandal-sheets and story papers of old London! Grab a decanter and top off your glass, unload your stumps, and let's go!

GLOSSARY OF FLASH TERMS USED IN THIS EPISODE:

• ACADEMICIANS: Bordello girls
• COLLEGIATES: Penitentiary prisoners
• KNIGHTS OF THE BRUSH AND MOON: Drunken fellows wandering amok in meadows and ditches, trying to stagger home.

• CHICKSTERS: Flamboyant ladies, often prostitutes
• LADYBIRDS: Another term for chicksters
• BULLY ROCKS: Brothel muscle men
• ABBESS: Brothel madam
• MOTHER H: A famous abbess from the 1830s
• BOLT THE MOON: Fly by night
• BEAKS: Magistrates and judges

Episode 13 of Season Three! — A Sunday-evening full episode (released a few hours early) IN WHICH —

01:50: MYSTERIES OF LONDON, Ch. 8:

• In which: “Mr. Walter Sydney”’s real name is, we learn, Eliza. She comes to her meeting with Mr. Stephens hoping for more information about what his plans are. She is worried that maybe her powers are being used for some kind of evil … well … are they?

19:20: TERRIFIC REGISTER ARTICLE:

• Lady Beresford's childhood friend, Lord Tyrone, appeared at her bedside one night. He had just died, and had appeared to her to warn her, so that she could avoid the fate that lay before her — to marry a cruel man and die young in childbirth. But would she have the strength to change her destiny?

35:45: THE VAMPYRE, by Dr. John Polidori (Part 2 of 3):

• IN WHICH: Our hero, Mr. Aubrey, falls in love with the lovely Greek maiden Ianthe, as he ranges around ancient Greece studying the ruins and antiquities. But when she begs him to be back before sunset from a visit that takes him through a certain forest thicket, and he’s distracted and runs a bit late, he has no idea what terrible things will result …

PLUS —

• We explore a "broadside ballad" published in 1850: "The Answer to the Wife's Dream" and "Woodman, Spare That Tree" ...

• We learn a few more Victorian "dad jokes" from good old Joe Miller!

Join host Finn J.D. John. for a one-hour-long spree through the scandal-sheets and story papers of old London! Grab a flicker of blue ruin, unload your stumps, and let's go!

EPISODE ART is from The Vampyre, and shows the search party finding the body of the vampyre's fair victim.

GLOSSARY OF FLASH TERMS USED IN THIS EPISODE:

• Knowing cards: What we might today call "smart cookies" — people who are sharp and on the ball.
• Lawful blankets: Legally married spouses.
• Knights of the Brush and Moon: Drunken fellows wandering amok by moonlight in fields and ditches, trying to stagger home.
• Lambskin Men: Judges.

• Pike off: Run away
• Red waistcoat: Uniform apparel of the Bow-street Runners, an early London police force replaced by the New Model Police (who dressed in blue rather than red) in 1839.
• Rum te tum with the chill off: Most emphatically excellent.