Have you ever asked yourself, “If he really loved us, why won’t he stop drinking?”

You’re not alone. So many Christian wives live in this painful confusion—trying to love, pray, and reason their way through addiction, only to feel rejected, unloved and unseen.

In this episode of Wife on the Rocks, we unpack the truth about the addicted brain and why love alone can’t undo addiction. You’ll hear:

✅ Why addiction hijacks the brain’s survival system—and why it’s not a matter of willpower or love. ✅ How logic and heartfelt pleas fall short when the brain is controlled by substance dependence. ✅ Why advice from people who don’t understand addiction often hurts more than it helps. ✅ A personal story of the naive stage of early addiction and how we think we can snap them out of it, but realizing that his addiction is stronger than we think. ✅ What it means to pray for your husband’s eyes to be opened by God in His timing.

Understanding this doesn’t make it easier—but it helped me stop taking the pain personally. There is always hope, because God is still working behind the scenes in ways you can’t see.

IT IS NOT TOO LATE! Join the Holiday Survival Course, created for wives of alcoholics who want to identify the options you have in situations, set boundaries with grace, and focus on God’s presence in the midst of the chaos. Special Holiday Course, BUT the tools you learn are applied year-long! 👉 https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/holiday-survival-course

📩 Have a question you’d like answered in a future episode? Want to share anything with me? Email hello@wifeontherocks.com.

Have you ever found yourself drawn into a heated or emotional conversation with your husband after he’s been drinking—only to regret it the next day when he doesn’t remember, denies it happened, or twists your words? In this episode of Wife on the Rocks, we’ll talk about why refusing to engage in conversation when alcohol is involved is not cold or controlling—it’s wise, protective, and biblical. Learn about the ONE boundary that I had to set in our home when addiction was taking over everything! Come along on this journey where co-dependency develops boundaries to deal with alcoholism in a way that can protect in the hard moments of gaslighting and conversations that spiral quickly!

You’ll learn:

• Why alcohol changes how people hear and process words.
• The logic behind disengaging (you wouldn’t debate with someone who’s not in their right mind).
• Why engaging feels like betraying yourself—and how to stop.
• What to do instead of arguing or trying to reason.
• How faith and boundaries can coexist without shame or guilt.

If you’ve ever felt stuck between silence and chaos, desiring to have a close relationship rooted in healthy communication, but instead wind up in an argument that goes nowhere, this episode will help you choose peace—and know that walking away doesn’t mean giving up. It is an essential boundary at times to protect your heart.

👉 Join the Holiday Survival Course to learn practical ways to navigate this season.

https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/holiday-survival-course

We are not helpless in this cycle, although it often feels that way, there are many things that we can be doing to walk in peace TODAY. Everything that I talk about on the Podcast and SO MUCH MORE!! The best part is that I am teaching LIVE for these 5 weeks and with interactive components, you can reach out for help and support as we go along! At the end of the 5 weeks you will have worked through the common traps this time of year and have built a plan specific for your family that you can rely on any day of the year!

It is like having the podcast (and me) in your pocket. Encouragement for 5 weeks straight!! Wrapped in beautiful paper and tied with a bow. A GIFT for YOU this Christmas!!

1) Guarding your mind from Gaslighting and walking in Truth

2) Recognize unhealthy patterns and how to break them

3) Parenting Challenges, A Child’s Perspective, Traditions and Scheduling

4) Boundaries that WORK for YOUR family

5) Protecting your mind from the mental spiral on the hard days

Don’t walk this path alone again! Find support, connection, and hope as we navigate the unpredicatability together, build a road map that works for your family, and have a plan designed especially for YOU in the moments that are too painful for words. Get your Hot Cocoa and snuggly blanket and let’s talk about how this year could look different!

Course begins in ONE Week on October 21st. Click here for full details and to grab your seat!!

https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/holiday-survival-course

👉 Need personalized support? Book a 1:1 coaching session or send your questions to hello@wifeontherocks.com. There are a few spots left before Thanksgiving!

Have you ever walked away from a conversation with your husband and thought, “Am I crazy?” You’re not. You may be experiencing gaslighting—one of the most confusing and painful behaviors that often shows up in alcoholic marriages.

In this episode of Wife on the Rocks, we’re going back to the basics. You’ll learn what gaslighting really is, how it makes you doubt your memory and emotions, and why it leaves you feeling like you can’t trust yourself.

We’ll talk about: ✅ How alcohol and denial fuel gaslighting in relationships ✅ Common gaslighting phrases and how they twist reality ✅ Why the constant confusion is not your fault ✅ How to start reclaiming your peace and confidence through truth and faith

If you’ve ever questioned your own sanity because of the chaos around you, this episode will help you breathe again and find peace through God’s truth.

✨ Ready to find peace through the holidays? Join my Holiday Survival Course, a 5-week experience BEGINNING OCTOBER 21 designed to help wives of alcoholics stay grounded, set boundaries with grace, and walk in peace this holiday season. You DO NOT have to walk through it this year alone!! I want to dive deeper with you and share with you what I have learned that has helped me to survive the most beautiful.......and sometimes the most painful part of the year for our family ♥

👉https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/1hrcoachingsession

Has your husband quit drinking, but the chaos, anger, or dysfunction in your home hasn’t gone away? Many Christian wives find themselves asking: “If he’s not drinking, why doesn’t life feel better?” Sobriety and recovery are not the same thing, and understanding the difference can bring clarity, peace, and direction.

In this episode of Wife on the Rocks, we’ll talk about:

• Why simply stopping alcohol isn’t the same as living in recovery.

• Common patterns of “dry drunk” behavior and how they impact the family.

• What real transformation looks like beyond putting down the bottle.

• Encouragement from Scripture

If you’ve been questioning whether your husband’s sobriety is real—or wondering why things still feel broken—this episode will help you spot the difference and anchor your hope in the One who truly restores.

👉 Submit any questions to https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/1hrcoachingsession

👉Come Hang Out With Me For The Holiday Survival Course LIVE October 2025

https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/holiday-survival-course

✨ Dreaming of a picture-perfect holiday, only to feel the weight of alcohol seeping into the season instead? You’re not alone. That’s why I created the Holiday Survival Course — a 5-week live small group where we’ll work together on building a thoughtful plan to help you navigate the holidays with more stability, peace, and faith.

I can’t promise everything will go smoothly — but I can give you tools to steady yourself in the unpredictability, protect your peace, and keep your heart anchored in Christ when things get hard.

We’ll meet on Zoom Tuesdays, October 21 through November 18, wrapping up just before Thanksgiving. Space is limited.

👉 Reserve your seat here: https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/holiday-survival-course

Does your husband push back when you mention Al-Anon—or accuse it of being “husband bashing”? You’re not alone. Many Christian wives long for support but feel trapped when their spouse doesn’t approve. In this episode of Wife on the Rocks, we’ll talk honestly about the struggle of wanting help with addiction and alcoholism while facing resistance at home.

You’ll hear:

• Why secrecy feels like lying, but sometimes becomes survival when you need support.

• The truth about what Al-Anon really is (and isn’t).

• Online meeting options through the Al-Anon app and other accessible resources.

• Alternative programs and supports that can meet the same needs.

• How coaching or courses (like my upcoming fall program) can give you faith-based support without secrecy.

You don’t have to choose between honoring your marriage and getting the help you need. The gaslighting of him saying that there isn't an issue in the first place and trying to make that make sense with what you are experiencing.......This conversation will help you sort through your options and move forward in wisdom and peace.

👉 Submit your questions for future episodes at https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/1hrcoachingsession

Curious about the fall course I am opening - Holiday Survival Course- email me to check out details and get on the waiting list! hello@wifeontherocks.com

Are you ever unsure if your actions are helping your alcoholic husband—or actually enabling him? Many Christian wives fall into codependent patterns without realizing it, believing they are loving, protecting, or supporting their spouse. But what feels like care can quietly fuel addiction and rob you of peace.

In this episode of Wife on the Rocks, we’ll explore what codependency really is, how to recognize enabling behaviors, and compare the dictionary definition with my personal definition. Together, we’ll look at the common patterns wives fall into, why they don’t work, and what I am in charge of compared to what I am not.

You’ll hear:

• The difference between helping and enabling in addiction.

• Common enabling behaviors like monitoring, covering, or rescuing—and why they backfire.

• The emotional toll of codependency (guilt, exhaustion, dysfunction).

• How to grieve what you hoped for in marriage while feeling guilty for not continuing the cycle.

• Simple first steps to begin breaking free from enabling patterns. Ask yourself this question.

If you’ve ever thought, “Am I helping him or just making things worse?”, this episode will bring clarity and hope for your journey as a Christian wife walking through addiction.

👉 Submit your questions for a future episode at hello@wifeontherocks.com.

👉 Want personalized support? My fall 1:1 coaching sessions are now open. Book directly here: https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/1hrcoachingsession

When you’re married to an alcoholic, it feels almost impossible not to keep watch over his drinking. Maybe you’ve counted bottles, checked the liquor cabinet, or tracked every sip at dinner—hoping that if you could just measure the problem, you could somehow control it.

In this episode, we’ll talk about why monitoring an alcoholic’s drinking doesn’t work and how it keeps you trapped in a cycle of anxiety, hypervigilance, and codependency. Addiction hijacks the brain, and no amount of checking or policing can make your husband choose sobriety. His recovery is his responsibility—not yours.

You’ll learn:

• Why watching his every move fuels your fear instead of giving peace.
• How addiction and alcoholism shift accountability away from him when you try to manage it.
• The emotional cost of living like a detective in your own home.
• What it looks like to release control and reclaim your peace in Christ.

If you’ve ever thought, “Maybe if I just keep track, I can get ahead of this,” this episode will show you a healthier way forward. Your husband’s sobriety is not your responsibility—but your peace, your healing, and your walk with God are.

📩 Do you have a question you’d like me to cover on a future episode? Email me at hello@wifeontherocks.com.

📅 Want to go deeper? My one-on-one coaching sessions are open now. Book here → (Temporarily unavailable. Email the above address and we will set a time:)

When gaslighting leaves you questioning your reality and your worth, it’s easy to spiral into anger, defensiveness, or despair. As wives, we long for our husbands to meet our emotional needs, but the truth is—no spouse can carry that weight fully. And when addiction and gaslighting are present, the gap feels even bigger than we ever imagined.

In this episode, I share how I’ve learned to regulate my emotions in the face of hurtful, confusing words. You’ll hear:

• Why it’s dangerous to seek validation from a spouse who cannot give it.

• Practical ways to counteract gaslighting without losing your peace.

• How knowing who I am in Christ steadies me when my marriage feels like less than I ever expected.

• Why Galatians 5:22 reminds me that the Holy Spirit equips me with self-control—even when I’m tempted to lash back in anger.

If you’ve ever thought, “I didn’t sign up for this—I expected so much more,” this episode will give you encouragement and practical tools to hold your ground in truth and respond with Spirit-led self-control.

📩 Do you have a question you’d like me to cover in a future episode, or a testimony of what God is doing in your life? Does your husband have a question for my husband? We are working on building our next interviews! Email me at https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/1hrcoachingsession